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Numbers 30 (vows and the man's authority)

Lila

Member
Female
It is quite startling to me how much authority and responsibility is put on the man as per Numbers 30. I was even wondering how is it fair towards the MAN, surely it must be quite "hard" on him?
Or do men following Yahwe not find it hard to have that much "burden" on their shoulders? Perhaps they were designed to cope with that much responsibility?

It simply is slightly over my head to grasp the fact that man is easily capable of having that much authority over the decisions of the woman and not crumble under the pressure. When thinking about it form my point of view, I certainly would.
 
I appreciate your view of this. I think that observation is a lot of reason why so many men embrace feminism and abdicate their roles because it is sobering and even frightening at times. Many more men try to make women submit without having to take responsibility themselves. On top of that, it runs so counter to our culture that they worry about being called abusive, manipulating or controlling.

There are passages that talk about husbands and fathers being held responsible for their wives and daughters' sin. It's not all privilege and sex with sister wives for patriarchs. Thank you for getting that.

To be honest though, my forays into this area have been far scarier in the run up then in the execution. Once you accept how deep your authority and responsibility run you either get strong or get out.
 
Thanks for your comment, that makes sense.

ZecAustin said:
...Once you accept how deep your authority and responsibility run you either get strong or get out.

I guess that's only fair enough to be either fully in or out. It's just too serious to hang around and do a bit of both...
 
Some days I am all "I've got this".

Some days I don't know if I can do it.

The rest of the days, I know that I cannot.
Not without help from the Almighty. Walking the walk is not easy and walking it well is nigh unto impossible.
 
Good work recognising that side of it. Too many people focus on "rights" while ignoring "responsibiities" - and this is a symptom of our secular culture today, where everything is about so-called "rights" while everyone expects the government to take all the "responsibilities"... But I digress.

The rights a man gains in marriage do not really "compensate" for the responsibilities he is taking on. Marriage is a very serious matter. And this is why so many men today won't commit to it, they have casual sexual relationships to try and snatch the odd taste of the fun bits of marriage while avoiding the responsibility of it.

Yet people then turn around and say that it is polygynous men who are just thinking of sex...

At least there are still real women who understand, and real men who are willing to take on these responsibilities, whatever the world might say about them.
 
It's actually reflected in the military as well. A service member is held responsible for and will suffer punishment for the actions of their dependents. The dependents can also have consequences, but the service member holds ultimate responsibility.


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The burden of this, which I more or less follow (whenever it comes up), is exceedingly light for me. I've been blessed to have been given a wife whose decisions are not difficult to manage. It isn't difficult to be a Numbers 30 man to a Proverbs 31 wife. And whenever I do exercise my 'veto power', it's as much of a blessing to her as it is to me; because it usually hinges around forbidding her to do something she really didn't want to for someone who was flagrantly taking advantage of her. 86ing those actions benefits me because I don't have to try to console her afterwards, and benefits her because she has a legitimate out. (Sorry! I can't be there next week, hubby said no!)

It does occasionally make me the bad guy, but as it protects my sanity and hers, a villain I must be!

If my wife was running around doing this all the time, or made a habit of intentionally volunteering herself for things, knowing I was going to bail her out.... That would be more burdensome. I see it as no less a responsibility than working for a living, though, so I wouldn't have too much to complain about even under those circumstances. Sometimes work is lame. Sometimes the wife needs to be reined in.

I'll take that over childbirth any day.
 
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