I thought that I would do a quick study of verses in the Bible concerning men's and women's roles in the subject of patriarchy. I listed the verses I looked at and then wrote how we as a family applied them.
Ephesians 5:20, 22-30 New International Version (NIV)
20 always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.
Instructions for Christian Households
22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body.
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Genesis 18:19 New International Version (NIV)
19 For I have chosen him, so that he will direct his children and his household after him to keep the way of the Lord by doing what is right and just, so that the Lord will bring about for Abraham what he has promised him.”
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Gen 3:16-20
16 To the woman he said,
“I will make your pains in childbearing very severe;
with painful labor you will give birth to children.
Your desire will be for your husband,
and he will rule over you.”
17 To Adam he said, “Because you listened to your wife and ate fruit from the tree about which I commanded you, ‘You must not eat from it,’
“Cursed is the ground because of you;
through painful toil you will eat food from it
all the days of your life.
18
It will produce thorns and thistles for you,
and you will eat the plants of the field.
19
By the sweat of your brow
you will eat your food
until you return to the ground,
since from it you were taken;
for dust you are
and to dust you will return.”
20 Adam named his wife Eve, because she would become the mother of all the living.
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Titus 2:1-5
2 You, however, must teach what is appropriate to sound doctrine. 2 Teach the older men to be temperate, worthy of respect, self-controlled, and sound in faith, in love and in endurance.
3 Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. 4 Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, 5 to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.
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Colossians 1:9-12 New International Version (NIV)
9 For this reason, since the day we heard about you, we have not stopped praying for you. We continually ask God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives,[a] 10 so that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, 11 being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, 12 and giving joyful thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of his holy people in the kingdom of light.
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1 Corinthians 11:3 New International Version (NIV)
3 But I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.
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Genesis 2:24 New International Version (NIV)
24 That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.
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1 Timothy 3:2-5 New International Version (NIV)
2 Now the overseer is to be above reproach, faithful to his wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, 3 not given to drunkenness, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. 4 He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him, and he must do so in a manner worthy of full respect. 5 (If anyone does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of God’s church?)
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Colossians 3:19 New International Version (NIV)
19 Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.
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1 Peter 3:1-2 New International Version (NIV)
3 Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, 2 when they see the purity and reverence of your lives.
==========================================================================
Titus 2:3-5 New International Version (NIV)
3 Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. 4 Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, 5 to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.
==========================================================================
1 Timothy 2:11-14 New International Version (NIV)
11 A woman should learn in quietness and full submission. 12 I do not permit a woman to teach or to assume authority over a man; she must be quiet. 13 For Adam was formed first, then Eve. 14 And Adam was not the one deceived; it was the woman who was deceived and became a sinner.
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Colossians 3:18 New International Version (NIV)
18 Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.
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In our family, Ron is the leader, the husband, the answerer to God for our actions. The buck stops with him, and he bears the brunt of our actions before God. He takes his role seriously and wants to present us to God as the beautiful daughters God gave into his keeping.
As in all govts., organizations, companies, ships, etc., there must be one leader. God set the husband as that leader of the home. Jesus is the leader of the husband, and God the leader of Jesus. There are always advisors to the leaders (i.e. board of directors, XO on ships, vice presidents, board of elders in churches, wives to husbands) but in all cases, the leader makes the final decisions.
Consider Adam, Noah, Abraham, Jacob, Moses, David, Solomon, and Jesus. All made the final decisions.
Our family is no different. True, all Christians are equal in God's eyes, but all have different roles in His Kingdom. We are married women and thus our roles are different than that of our husband, different, but important in God's eyes. Thus in our family dynamics we as women offer our suggestions, but accept the decisions of our husband as that which God has given him. As a family, we are all under God's umbrella which is over the husband's umbrella which is over the wife.
Here are the lyrics of a song from 'The King and I', as sung by the first wife. I feel the same way about Ron.
Something Wonderful
This is a man who thinks with his heart,
His heart is not always wise.
This is a man who stumbles and falls,
But this is a man who tries.
This is a man you'll forgive and forgive,
And help protect, as long as you live...
He will not always say
What you would have him say,
But now and then he'll do
Something
Wonderful.
He has a thousand dreams
That won't come true,
You know that he believes in them
And that's enough for you.
You'll always go along,
Defend him where he's wrong
And tell him, when he's strong
He is
Wonderful
He'll always
Need your love
And so he'll get your love.
A man who needs your love
Can be
Wonderful.
She'll always go along
Defend him when he's wrong
And tell him when he's strong
He is wonderful.
He'll always need her love
And so he'll get her love
A man who needs your love
Can be wonderful.
Ephesians 5:20, 22-30 New International Version (NIV)
20 always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.
Instructions for Christian Households
22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body.
=====================================================================
Genesis 18:19 New International Version (NIV)
19 For I have chosen him, so that he will direct his children and his household after him to keep the way of the Lord by doing what is right and just, so that the Lord will bring about for Abraham what he has promised him.”
=================================================
Gen 3:16-20
16 To the woman he said,
“I will make your pains in childbearing very severe;
with painful labor you will give birth to children.
Your desire will be for your husband,
and he will rule over you.”
17 To Adam he said, “Because you listened to your wife and ate fruit from the tree about which I commanded you, ‘You must not eat from it,’
“Cursed is the ground because of you;
through painful toil you will eat food from it
all the days of your life.
18
It will produce thorns and thistles for you,
and you will eat the plants of the field.
19
By the sweat of your brow
you will eat your food
until you return to the ground,
since from it you were taken;
for dust you are
and to dust you will return.”
20 Adam named his wife Eve, because she would become the mother of all the living.
================================================================
Titus 2:1-5
2 You, however, must teach what is appropriate to sound doctrine. 2 Teach the older men to be temperate, worthy of respect, self-controlled, and sound in faith, in love and in endurance.
3 Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. 4 Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, 5 to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.
==========================================================================
Colossians 1:9-12 New International Version (NIV)
9 For this reason, since the day we heard about you, we have not stopped praying for you. We continually ask God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives,[a] 10 so that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, 11 being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, 12 and giving joyful thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of his holy people in the kingdom of light.
==========================================================================
1 Corinthians 11:3 New International Version (NIV)
3 But I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.
==========================================================================
Genesis 2:24 New International Version (NIV)
24 That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.
=========================================================================
1 Timothy 3:2-5 New International Version (NIV)
2 Now the overseer is to be above reproach, faithful to his wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, 3 not given to drunkenness, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. 4 He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him, and he must do so in a manner worthy of full respect. 5 (If anyone does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of God’s church?)
==========================================================================
Colossians 3:19 New International Version (NIV)
19 Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.
==========================================================================
1 Peter 3:1-2 New International Version (NIV)
3 Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, 2 when they see the purity and reverence of your lives.
==========================================================================
Titus 2:3-5 New International Version (NIV)
3 Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. 4 Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, 5 to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.
==========================================================================
1 Timothy 2:11-14 New International Version (NIV)
11 A woman should learn in quietness and full submission. 12 I do not permit a woman to teach or to assume authority over a man; she must be quiet. 13 For Adam was formed first, then Eve. 14 And Adam was not the one deceived; it was the woman who was deceived and became a sinner.
==========================================================================
Colossians 3:18 New International Version (NIV)
18 Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.
=========================================================================
In our family, Ron is the leader, the husband, the answerer to God for our actions. The buck stops with him, and he bears the brunt of our actions before God. He takes his role seriously and wants to present us to God as the beautiful daughters God gave into his keeping.
As in all govts., organizations, companies, ships, etc., there must be one leader. God set the husband as that leader of the home. Jesus is the leader of the husband, and God the leader of Jesus. There are always advisors to the leaders (i.e. board of directors, XO on ships, vice presidents, board of elders in churches, wives to husbands) but in all cases, the leader makes the final decisions.
Consider Adam, Noah, Abraham, Jacob, Moses, David, Solomon, and Jesus. All made the final decisions.
Our family is no different. True, all Christians are equal in God's eyes, but all have different roles in His Kingdom. We are married women and thus our roles are different than that of our husband, different, but important in God's eyes. Thus in our family dynamics we as women offer our suggestions, but accept the decisions of our husband as that which God has given him. As a family, we are all under God's umbrella which is over the husband's umbrella which is over the wife.
Here are the lyrics of a song from 'The King and I', as sung by the first wife. I feel the same way about Ron.
Something Wonderful
This is a man who thinks with his heart,
His heart is not always wise.
This is a man who stumbles and falls,
But this is a man who tries.
This is a man you'll forgive and forgive,
And help protect, as long as you live...
He will not always say
What you would have him say,
But now and then he'll do
Something
Wonderful.
He has a thousand dreams
That won't come true,
You know that he believes in them
And that's enough for you.
You'll always go along,
Defend him where he's wrong
And tell him, when he's strong
He is
Wonderful
He'll always
Need your love
And so he'll get your love.
A man who needs your love
Can be
Wonderful.
She'll always go along
Defend him when he's wrong
And tell him when he's strong
He is wonderful.
He'll always need her love
And so he'll get her love
A man who needs your love
Can be wonderful.
