General A use for Concubines?

[paterfamilias]

Believe me, it can happen with nothing more than her own bedroom.

Oh I know. When my second wife came along we were in a much smaller house. Plus I am mainly thinking in terms of ideals and ideals often take time.
Likely when we move out to the country, we won't have as big of a house as we have now. So if/when we meet a woman who is to be my wife, she may only have a room to herself.
The nice bit will be that we all have land to run round on.

 

[paterfamilias]

Oh I know. When my second wife came along we were in a much smaller house. Plus I am mainly thinking in terms of ideals and ideals often take time.
Likely when we move out to the country, we won't have as big of a house as we have now. So if/when we meet a woman who is to be my wife, she may only have a room to herself.
The nice bit will be that we all have land to run round on.

Ugh...
I had not had even the first sip of coffee when I read Steve's response or failed to read it properly and got it all upside down.

Yeah, I have also had the retreat to their room to avoid the family situation as well.

Now...about that coffee

 

[MeganC]

I have to assume that the small number of these women who were/are sincere in the desire to lead plig life, will in fairly short order be snapped up by the men or couples who are willing to agree to those terms. I also assume that by going along with that notion of immediate equals just by setting foot in the door, that the relationship is all the more likely to be doomed from the start.

Agreed.

I dislike being seen as a bad decision and that a woman would feel trapped in a marriage with me but I suppose I can see how thst might be an unavailable stage in a relationship with some women. Just doesn't sound particularly flattering

"Feeling trapped" doesn't mean I thought I made a bad decision. This is where I get to plead female and say that while there was no where else in the world I wanted to be than to be with my family the fact that my choice to stay or leave was no longer practical was scary. That's just me.

I'm sure there have a been a few astronauts who took off for space and who had similar feelings the moment the rocket started up and their decision to go or not go became irreversible. Like it or not, they were going. There are no do-overs.

with the number of false starts and times we have been ghosted by women who were the day before professing love for me/us, I would certainly need to have the commitment proven more than a little.

Don't take it personally. It is a thing with people to just cut ties without any explanation. It's them and not you.

Well...the flirtation I will receive on occasion certainly is not because I am pretty so I suppose that might explain it

Confidence and assertiveness are always far sexier than mere appearances.

That is very much the plan.
I grew up on a cattle ranch and while I don't know remotely what Nick does for example, I know enough to get started on a bit of a side income on some land. Later I would hope to make it my occupation but I suspect that for the first couple of years I would change roles at my company and work remotely. Be home to help with homeschool as well as chores during breaks from work.
Take my zoom calls in my grubby overalls sort of thing

Land does a lot of things. When we first moved up here the big thing was Steve had plenty of room to store all of the equipment he brought from California. There was and still is a lot of it. And we save money by not paying for storing it somewhere else.

If you have land you can do lots of things simply because you have room. Like maybe you do charter buses? Now you have a place to store them and work on them. Or maybe you have an airplane and can fly off a dirt strip instead of paying for storage and landing fees somewhere else. All sorts of things you can do if you simply have room to do them. Ranching and farming are just the start of what you can do with land.

I have had a notion about having a suite for each wife with a small living area, nice bedroom and bathroom as well as a (kitchenette).
I would not wish to encourage a wife withdrawing to her suite constantly to avoid the family by any means but I can certainly see the need for each woman to have her own space and the ability to escape a bit now and then from a presumably rambunctious house full of kids and a whimsical husband's shenanigans

Just a plain bedroom is nice and cheaper. Especially when you're sick or need peace and quiet. Or when the husband is busy with another sister in his room. It can be practical and it can even be shared.

 

[paterfamilias]

Confidence and assertiveness are always far sexier than mere appearances.

Land does a lot of things. When we first moved up here the big thing was Steve had plenty of room to store all of the equipment he brought from California. There was and still is a lot of it. And we save money by not paying for storing it somewhere else.

Don't I know it.
Part of my criteria is to find the right place with a good amount of infrastructure already in place. One big one over tight wire and dependable water source is going to be a big-ass polebarn, ideally with a living quarters of some kind in it. Mainly for storage of vehicles and equipment but so very much else. Perfect world would be one with a large at least partial wrap around mezzanine with enough square footage for all the storage and then various bays for different types of equipment or back up parts or motors or pallets of this supply or that material under the mezzanine.

it is a topic my future wife will have to learn to embrace as it is something I brainstorm about regularly and am always wanting to bounce ideas off others for feedback. Then that goes for pretty much all of the ranch/farm/homestead concept.
Happily my wife also enjoys the topic and enjoys my tangents and facinations.

If you have land you can do lots of things simply because you have room. Like maybe you do charter buses? Now you have a place to store them and work on them.

Don't I know it.
walk with me for a moment as I show you round my boyhood shooting range that intend to recreate.
it started out as a dry dirt 1/2'ish acre stock tank with about 10ft berm running in a circle.
I could shoot in any direction and not have to worry. Mainly it was targets set up on old metal drums I had set up here and there and entirely too many old cola cans blown to smithereens for it to be aesthetically pleasing bit it was was amazing to a 12 year old boy.

What I will do in future with a (U or maybe an S shap as I no longer live in a desert and don't wish to inadvertently create a stock tank in this instance) similar arrangement is build the closest I can to a full sized version of a carnival shooting gallery as I can manage with reactive targets. That and a nice three gun course naturally.
Now to track down a girl who would gets how delightful woman look all rigged up

Or maybe you have an airplane and can fly off a dirt strip instead of paying for storage and landing fees somewhere else.

please don't tempt me. I will get myself in enough trouble in my war era jeep.
Before I was a dad, I was very much the guy to get a wild hair and build a ultralight or buy an older than dirt Cessna and figure I can just figure it out.
With wife and child though

All sorts of things you can do if you simply have room to do them. Ranching and farming are just the start of what you can do with land.

So many potential side gigs you can do as well...one of which I will tell you about personally later as it might be something your family might consider as well. Good money to be made.

I am looking forward in large part to kids having the opportunity to run amuck on the land and enjoy themselves in a way that is just can't be done in the city or suburbs

 

[NickF]

@paterfamilias you mentioned not knowing what I do for a living. Design compounds like what you’re talking about. That’s a short way to describe my work.

 

[paterfamilias]

@paterfamilias you mentioned not knowing what I do for a living. Design compounds like what you’re talking about. That’s a short way to describe my work.

Not sure where the confusion started. I was referencing not having your level of knowledge...giving you accolades for your expertise

 

[NickF]

Not sure where the confusion started. I was referencing not having your level of knowledge...giving you accolades for your expertise

Why thank you. Would be happy to offer any help should you want it.

 

[paterfamilias]

Why thank you. Would be happy to offer any help should you want it.

I hope you don't regret the offer later as I am like any info nerd with access to a content expert.

 

[theleastofthese]

For myself....I really hate that idea!

I appreciate company and help in the kitchen.

I don't want my own to work in ....alone, or clean.....by myself.

I don't even like the idea of separate rooms. I never had my own room growing up, I have shared a room with my husband for 27 years, a room to myself sounds lonely. I might not mind a room.....for sewing! Or another bedroom off the master for when a young one is sick so mom can be there with greater comfort for her, and less impact on the other adults. My dear husband has taken the couch in previous years and let the little one sleep with me, but another room for that would be nice.

I always felt if you couldn't live together there would really be no point. I wanted more family....not to divide the one we have.

I agree regarding the kitchen; i've never understood why some women find it so difficult to share common areas, like they're some gangsters in a turf war

However, the bedroom is a little more understandable to me; my preference would be to have my own bedroom because I enjoy alone time at times, I'd also like to enjoy some moments with just my husband as well. I'd still love having a large family all the same. It's nice that polygany offers so many options; that's one of the reasons I find it so interesting.

 

[Joleneakamama]

I enjoy alone time at times,

So do I.

I'd also like to enjoy some moments with just my husband as well.

So do we. In fact he also likes one on one time for visiting...or intimacy.
I just like the pillow talks, or being able to touch going to sleep. I'm quite used to that.