date1
dāt/
verb
gerund or present participle:
dating
- establish or ascertain the date of (an object or event).
"they date the paintings to 1460–70"
synonyms: assign a date to, ascertain the date of, put a date on
"the sculpture can be dated accurately"
- mark with a date.
"sign and date the document"
- have its origin at a particular time; have existed since.
"the controversy dates back to 1986"
synonyms: was made in, was built in, originates in, comes from, belongs to, goes back to
"the building dates from the sixteenth century"
- indicate or expose as being old-fashioned.
"disco—that word alone dates me"
- seem old-fashioned.
"a movie that will date quickly"
synonyms: become old-fashioned, become outmoded, become dated, show its ageMore
"the best films don't date"
old-fashioned, outdated, outmoded, passé, behind the times, archaic,obsolete, antiquated;
unfashionable, unstylish, untrendy;
crusty, old world, prehistoric, antediluvian;
informalold hat, out, uncool
"the graphics look somewhat dated"
antonyms: modern
- go out with (someone in whom one is romantically or sexually interested).
"my sister's pretty judgmental about the girls I date"
synonyms: go out with, take out, go around with, be involved with, see, go steady with;More
datedwoo, court
"he's dating Jill"
court
kôrt/
verb
dated
gerund or present participle:
courting
- be involved with romantically, typically with the intention of marrying.
"he was courting a girl from the neighboring farm"
synonyms: go out with, pursue, run after, chase; More
- (of a male bird or other animal) try to attract (a mate).
- pay special attention to (someone) in an attempt to win their support or favor.
"Western politicians courted the leaders of the newly independent states"
synonyms: curry favor with, cultivate, try to win over, make up to, ingratiate oneself with;
informalsuck up to, butter up
"a newspaper editor who was courted by senior politicians
The diffrence between dating and courting is the intent. One is a relastionship in of itself and the other is a stepping stone for those intent on marrying. Some want to link courting to the Jewish Betrothal thinking it makes courting Biblical.
The term "betrothal" in Jewish law must not be understood in its modern sense; that is, the agreement of a man and a woman to marry, by which the parties are not, however, definitely bound, but which may be broken or dissolved without formal divorce. Betrothal or engagement such as this is not known either to the Bible or to the Talmud, and only crept in among the medieval and modern Jews through the influence of the example of the Occidental nations among whom they dwelt, without securing a definite status in rabbinical law.
In the Bible.
Several Biblical passages refer to the negotiations requisite for the arranging of a marriage (
Gen. 24; Song of Songs 8:8; Judges 14:2-7), which were conducted by members of the two families involved, or their deputies, and required usually the consent of the prospective bride; but when the agreement had been entered into, it was definite and binding upon both groom and bride, who were considered as man and wife in all legal and religious aspects, except that of actual cohabitation.(
Courting is not binding)
The root
("to betroth"), from which the Talmudic abstract
("betrothal") is derived, must be taken in this sense;
i.e., to contract an actual though incomplete marriage. In two of the passages in which it occurs the betrothed woman is directly designated as "wife" (
II Sam. 3:14, "
my wife whom I have betrothed" ("erasti"), and
Deut. 22:24, where the betrothed is designated as "
the wife of his neighbor"). In strict accordance with this sense the rabbinical law declares that the betrothal is equivalent to an actual marriage and only to be dissolved by a formal divorce.
After the betrothal a period of twelve months was allowed to pass before the marriage was completed by the formal home-taking ("nissu'in," "liḳḳuḥin"). In case the bride was a widow or the groom a widower, this interval was reduced to thirty days (
Ket. v. 2; Shulḥan 'Aruk, Eben ha-'Ezer, 56). After the dispersal of the Jews had brought them into contact with the Western peoples, this arrangement was felt to be inconvenient and out of harmony with the prevailing views. It therefore becamecustomary to perform the entire marriage ceremony, betrothal and home-taking ("erusin" and "nissu'in"), at one time; and an affiancing or engagement similar to that prevailing among non-Jews was introduced. This was not an entire innovation, as its roots already existed in the custom of "shiddukin" or consent to marry, which existed in the days of the Talmud and probably also in the Biblical age. It was considered indispensable by the rabbis that a man should gain the good-will and consent of his prospective bride before entering upon a contract of marriage. Rab, the Babylonian amora, was accustomed to punish severely any one who married without first having persuaded and gained the consent of his wife (
Ḳid. 13a; Yeb. 52a et al.).
What was in the Talmudic age a mere personal matter became in later times a formal custom, which was celebrated with much pomp. At these occasions it was customary to make out a formal contract to marry and to stipulate that a penalty should be imposed upon either party who should fail to fulfil his or her part of it. Such agreements were known as "shiddukin" (consent to marry), and also as "tenaim" (conditions), or among German-speaking Jews "ḳenas-mahl" (penalty-feast), because of these stipulations and penalties. They are still customary in many countries in modified form.
There is now no legal duration of time between betrothal and marriage, the length of the engagement being left entirely to the option of the parties concerned, except that the marriage may not take place in less than seven days after the agreement to marry has been reached (
Nid. 66a; Shulḥan 'Aruk, Yoreh De'ah, 192).
