I'm
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Getting through the closeminded parts of accepting PM
- Thread starter Mikki G.
- Start date
I have Wild by Heart! Great book about understanding men. Hunter gatherers they are.
You ever think that "crazy" is a quality. Sons n Daughters have always been considered crazyvto the world.
That's kinda like what my mom said to me. The mindset of a man is that he is suppose to be the provider for his family so he has a mindset of wanting to do everything in his power to fulfill that role. Me and my husband talked about that. I love that he provides for me and my daughter but he can lean on me anytime he wants. I am here to love and support him. To the best of my ability.
Well I am the middle child so I kinda have to be crazy. Lol.
Hopefully you build the kind of relationship where that is not an option.
Start slow and ease into it. Just ask him about the polygamy in the OT and what he thinks about it and take it from there. If he seems to be getting irritated or upset about it back off.
Now that I can do
Mikki,
I too am a middle child. There is not a greater feeling for most men than to know than that, the Love of his life is there. Not just at home, but there. Read some of Ella Wheeler Wilcox's poems. She was an amazing woman with amazing insight. She is great for men, to help them understand women. She is great for women, to help her be creative, that she might see that, " All men are unawakened gods." Remember we all are different for a divine purpose. Real Love is the key that awakens us all to Him.
I too am a middle child. There is not a greater feeling for most men than to know than that, the Love of his life is there. Not just at home, but there. Read some of Ella Wheeler Wilcox's poems. She was an amazing woman with amazing insight. She is great for men, to help them understand women. She is great for women, to help her be creative, that she might see that, " All men are unawakened gods." Remember we all are different for a divine purpose. Real Love is the key that awakens us all to Him.
I just heard Dr. Tony Evans for the first time this morning in church, as he was the visiting pastor. He gave an incredible sermon on Kingdom Men and Kingdom Disciples. I came home to research him and look at his books. I plan to order both: "Kingdom Man: Every Mans Destiny, Every Woman's Dream" and "Kingdom Disciples".
Haha, that's also how I started working on my first wife!
I made sure we saw Big Love... later it was Sister Wives...
Of course bible talk too but it's nice to have something you can veg out to sometimes and let the actors do the arguing.
She really enjoyed those shows and I believe it was really helpful in getting her ready to hear the bible verses.
Hey you mentioned your husband is good at biblical Hebrew.
If he's up for the talk, you might ask him to analyze for you the Genesis 2:24 "... therefore a man will leave his father and mother and cling to his woman and they will be one flesh." If you can work it in innocently (though surely he'll be on to you) ask about that Hebrew word underlying one.
I don't want to say much more because I want you to have plausible deniability if you are truly interested in this verse then you can truly ask him and let him be the source of the answer
In other words, so you aren't "leading" him but are "learning" from him.
Hey can you share a link for the audio?
We understand your heart sister, and being the middle child has its advantages to pulling things together...
You already have that going for you (God blessed you with your particular heart), where many in this world can't get past being just for the "Self" life
So... many can and will "like the romantic idea" of many spouses, but few can commit to giving up them"selves" fully, more than once, where even the full giving of self once, is a rare thing in all of society!
That boils down the real challenge: The toughest part to fulfilling plural marriage is not entering into it (anybody can easily claim it), but it is keeping the marriage focused solely on " giving your all, and being totally transparent with more than just one precious person", and never for what you can get from it, or how it can compliment an ego's portfolio!
As the numbers of truly married people increase in a ploy marriage, the rewards of more pure hearted love surpasses monogamous in an unfathomable expediential rate, but the challenges to overcome the increased numbers of "selves" is definitely much tougher than single or monogamous life!
The question is not so much "if you want this tremendous potential of love surrounding your life", but "are you strong enough to overcome your self perseveration, to give that much love away, without any expectations"?
Once you have truly overcome yourself, the next step is to overcome overwhelming masses of societies selves, and find your humbled soulmate(s)
In college my hope for this world seemed bleak (like my poem below), but I now know "God is a master of overcoming all the odds" if you're with & in Him:
The fear of competition
a plague for all mankind,
it’s more a heart condition
real Wisdom can’t deny.
The world is full of takers,
self-sustainers, opinions oh so high.
How can any fear our Maker?
Without a Parent all would die.
Why do masses hide in Masses
living lives they learn to hide,
donning souls with dark glasses
all consumed, with no answer why?
Ever notice who shrinks back
when conversation turns on high?
God is not your competition,
your Ego feeds you a lie.
I know this world is not my Home,
I’m simply passing through.
I know my fate is safe, but I worry;
What in Hell will you do?
Sadly, this world is what you have to sift through, but have faith... your soulmates are in there somewhere and the endless blessings are also there for sure!
How persistent are you to stay faithful, to sift through this world of selves: that is your biggest question at this point!
Many are called, but few are chosen and given the total humbleness to succeed....
That much said: true "Poly/Self Depravation/Faithful Co-Dependence" commitments in life, is as close to God's real heart as you can ever come on this earth!
(To prove the sad existence of what is in this world to sift through, look back and watch the reactions of the dark glasses...)
You already have that going for you (God blessed you with your particular heart), where many in this world can't get past being just for the "Self" life
So... many can and will "like the romantic idea" of many spouses, but few can commit to giving up them"selves" fully, more than once, where even the full giving of self once, is a rare thing in all of society!
That boils down the real challenge: The toughest part to fulfilling plural marriage is not entering into it (anybody can easily claim it), but it is keeping the marriage focused solely on " giving your all, and being totally transparent with more than just one precious person", and never for what you can get from it, or how it can compliment an ego's portfolio!
As the numbers of truly married people increase in a ploy marriage, the rewards of more pure hearted love surpasses monogamous in an unfathomable expediential rate, but the challenges to overcome the increased numbers of "selves" is definitely much tougher than single or monogamous life!
The question is not so much "if you want this tremendous potential of love surrounding your life", but "are you strong enough to overcome your self perseveration, to give that much love away, without any expectations"?
Once you have truly overcome yourself, the next step is to overcome overwhelming masses of societies selves, and find your humbled soulmate(s)
In college my hope for this world seemed bleak (like my poem below), but I now know "God is a master of overcoming all the odds" if you're with & in Him:
The fear of competition
a plague for all mankind,
it’s more a heart condition
real Wisdom can’t deny.
The world is full of takers,
self-sustainers, opinions oh so high.
How can any fear our Maker?
Without a Parent all would die.
Why do masses hide in Masses
living lives they learn to hide,
donning souls with dark glasses
all consumed, with no answer why?
Ever notice who shrinks back
when conversation turns on high?
God is not your competition,
your Ego feeds you a lie.
I know this world is not my Home,
I’m simply passing through.
I know my fate is safe, but I worry;
What in Hell will you do?
Sadly, this world is what you have to sift through, but have faith... your soulmates are in there somewhere and the endless blessings are also there for sure!
How persistent are you to stay faithful, to sift through this world of selves: that is your biggest question at this point!
Many are called, but few are chosen and given the total humbleness to succeed....
That much said: true "Poly/Self Depravation/Faithful Co-Dependence" commitments in life, is as close to God's real heart as you can ever come on this earth!
(To prove the sad existence of what is in this world to sift through, look back and watch the reactions of the dark glasses...)
Hey you mentioned your husband is good at biblical Hebrew.
If he's up for the talk, you might ask him to analyze for you the Genesis 2:24 "... therefore a man will leave his father and mother and cling to his woman and they will be one flesh." If you can work it in innocently (though surely he'll be on to you) ask about that Hebrew word underlying one.
I don't want to say much more because I want you to have plausible deniability if you are truly interested in this verse then you can truly ask him and let him be the source of the answer
He loves studying. He loves that he can learn something new and apply it to himself. It's one of the things I love about him. I'm so use to thinking black and white. And use to thinking that there is no in between. But my husband sees the good in everything and so he is constantly learning how to evolve personally. Love love love him for that
We understand your heart sister, and being the middle child has its advantages to pulling things together...
You already have that going for you (God blessed you with your particular heart), where many in this world can't get past being just for the "Self" life
So... many can and will "like the romantic idea" of many spouses, but few can commit to giving up them"selves" fully, more than once, where even the full giving of self once, is a rare thing in all of society!
That boils down the real challenge: The toughest part to fulfilling plural marriage is not entering into it (anybody can easily claim it), but it is keeping the marriage focused solely on " giving your all, and being totally transparent with more than just one precious person", and never for what you can get from it, or how it can compliment an ego's portfolio!
As the numbers of truly married people increase in a ploy marriage, the rewards of more pure hearted love surpasses monogamous in an unfathomable expediential rate, but the challenges to overcome the increased numbers of "selves" is definitely much tougher than single or monogamous life!
The question is not so much "if you want this tremendous potential of love surrounding your life", but "are you strong enough to overcome your self perseveration, to give that much love away, without any expectations"?
Once you have truly overcome yourself, the next step is to overcome overwhelming masses of societies selves, and find your humbled soulmate(s)
In college my hope for this world seemed bleak (like my poem below), but I now know "God is a master of overcoming all the odds" if you're with & in Him:
The fear of competition
a plague for all mankind,
it’s more a heart condition
real Wisdom can’t deny.
The world is full of takers,
self-sustainers, opinions oh so high.
How can any fear our Maker?
Without a Parent all would die.
Why do masses hide in Masses
living lives they learn to hide,
donning souls with dark glasses
all consumed, with no answer why?
Ever notice who shrinks back
when conversation turns on high?
God is not your competition,
your Ego feeds you a lie.
I know this world is not my Home,
I’m simply passing through.
I know my fate is safe, but I worry;
What in Hell will you do?
Sadly, this world is what you have to sift through, but have faith... your soulmates are in there somewhere and the endless blessings are also there for sure!
How persistent are you to stay faithful, to sift through this world of selves: that is your biggest question at this point!
Many are called, but few are chosen and given the total humbleness to succeed....
That much said: true "Poly/Self Depravation/Faithful Co-Dependence" commitments in life, is as close to God's real heart as you can ever come on this earth!
(To prove the sad existence of what is in this world to sift through, look back and watch the reactions of the dark glasses...)
Getting past the "self" thought will be the hardest thing for me
Just keep seeking wisdom and learning His will, and let it soften you...
Your husband's curiosity will have to know why you've grown, and what you've found out
With my family,
I start by simply trusting Him, telling myself "no matter how urgent things appear, God's got all this" (Hebrews 4:13)
then I stay mindful that He always follows through where I can't, and never give up (Hebrews 6:10-12),
next I willfully give in to the power of God's heart, knowing He needs me in this family (1st Peter 3:1- 2),
and finally I realize my every action and motive is important to accomplishing His purpose (Titus 2:4-5)!
Remember Sister,
Trust with Diligence;
Submit and be Faithful...
This will speak more to your husband's soul, than us wives could ever hope to verbally!
Mikki, you are already far ahead of most; praise God for you valuing His heart of love!
In a world full of judges and opinion worshipers, honesty and humbleness is always, and forever will be, "our only cure"!
Never underestimate your position, a wife is a key piece to His plan!
This is His love letter to me (and you):
Nothing in all creation is hidden from God's sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account. God is not unjust; he will not forget your work and the love you have shown him as you have helped his people and continue to help them. We want each of you to show this same diligence to the very end, so that what you hope for may be fully realized. We do not want you to become lazy, but to imitate those who through faith and patience inherit what has been promised. Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.
May I gently say that if your husband is not drawn to this lifestyle, it may not be a good fit for him.
If he is not a good fit for it, he may try it just to please you.
You will rue the day if that happens, because it takes incredible commitment to do it well and it will fail if his heart and soul are not in it.
Oh I understand that. Just because I'm for it doesn't mean he has to be. I love him either way. I love him for him. If I tried to force this on him it makes him into something that he is not and that isn't the man I love so yeah