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Hello from New Zealand - Husband's version

FollowingHim

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I've been discussing things on this forum for a while now but haven't got around to introducing myself, although my wife has. So hello everyone!

I'm an agricultural researcher, and live on a farm in New Zealand, off the electricity grid (which makes life interesting at times). One wife, and four living children all under four years (although I haven't met the fourth yet as he/she is still hiding inside my wife, very antisocial these babies sometimes), plus two that we know of in heaven.

I have long known there was nothing wrong with polygyny, this was impressed on me as a teenager just through my own Bible reading. In my late teens I used to joke that I was going to have five wives - two to work so I could be lazy, a cook, a cleaner, and a personal assistant :D. However I generally thought seriously about it only in terms of evangelism in Africa. I have often heard stories of Christian missionaries converting polygynous African chiefs and requiring them to abandon all wives but one, and felt amazed that any Christian could actually support, much less require, such injustice. But God has developed my thoughts over time. I then realised that polygyny would actually be the perfect way for a missionary to integrate into African society and help his wife run the house in more primitive conditions than she was used to - marry a local girl, she can teach first wife how to live in Africa, first wife can teach second how to function in Western society, it seems perfect. It's just the one thing the church wouldn't allow.

Back in January I was delivering a sermon at our church, and decided to shock people into reading their Bibles by speaking on three topics they would never have heard preached on before due to their controversy (I like preaching on controversial topics, it's far more fun than just hearing "God loves you" for the millionth time). I preached on circumcision, whether cohabitation without State marriage was really a sin, and polygamy. I gave out internet references for all three topics and challenged every member of the congregation to pick one issue they were worked up about and investigate it more fully for themselves. And I chose myself to investigate polygyny further.

I ran across this website and other related ones as part of my research for this sermon. I was amazed to find there were Christians actually living this life in the West, and it suddenly opened my eyes to a whole new world of possibility for my own life! A fortnight after my sermon, my wife wanted to find an internet discussion forum where she could talk about issues relating to larger families (as we don't use contraception we're heading that way rather rapidly!). I remembered this forum and suggested she look here, since polygynous families would be likely to end up with plenty of children! And from that point my wife and I have been on this journey together, learning and praying.

The deep discussions we have had as husband and wife on this issue have drawn us together closer than we have ever been in the past, and we both look forward to a potentially interesting future! God does not impress this issue on many people, and there are few wives who would accept it readily. However He has given me a wife that is just as keen on following His word in this area as myself, and there must be a reason for that. It may be because He has another wife out there for me, but it could be simply that we are to be willing to support others in this area but not do it ourselves. I don't know yet, but I can't wait to find out (and we're both earnestly praying for the former!).

In this forum I have found a group of people who are willing to actually take God's word as their guide, rather than take some denomination's teachings as their guide and selectively use the Bible to justify them. This is a rare group, and I greatly appreciate all of you for what we have learnt from your past discussions and your responses to our queries. I hope to be able to meet some of you some day.
 
Welcome. New Zealand sounds so exotic and nice. Ok anyplace warm sounds nice :) Your journey into poly sounds somewhat familiar. My husband and I have felt poly was allowed in the Bible and have thought it horrible that missionaries force African natives to leave their families to starve since without a husbands support they are doomed. Anyway don't get me started there...advancing on, we decided in December to actually pursue it seriously after watching the second season of Sister Wives and seeing a real poly family at work...The friendship, love and support is enough to make us a little jealous. We are waiting for God to send us 2 wives that way there's no odd man out. When one wife is with hubby the other 2 wives have each other to talk to and watch movies with.
I like your idea about being a missionary to Africa...sounds like a good idea that would work.
Blessings, Polarfamily.
 
Note I am no longer considering becoming a missionary, the West is less Christian now than the traditional mission fields and in more need of evangelism in many ways. Good idea for someone else though, or us if God leads.
 
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