Holy Jealousy

[Tlaloc]

While in polygyny we tend to look at jealousy as a bad thing, I think its good to remember that it is not in all cases. Of course it is a problem when women are jealous between each other, when they see each other as competing for a goal rather than sharing a goal. There is a time jealousy is good for women though. For men jealousy is a good thing (provided it paranoid) in terms of position within the family we do not tolerate any rival and we should not.

It was a curious thing, I've been trying to see when my wife would get jealous of me and other women, it seemed impossible to provoke the slightest jealousy (rather, the more I pursued the more she was happy with me for my efforts) I wondered if she even felt jealousy, and then one evening I found she did. Someone was flirting with the main girl we where pursuing, well, she has a fierce jealous streak. She is jealous for me rather than against me, and she really does not like when any other man is even flirting with a girl she wants for me. That made me pretty happy, and reminded me that jealousy, properly applied, is a good thing.

 

[Chaplain]

Tlaloc,
Good post. Jealousy used in the right manner for the right reasons can and will be up lifting to those it is mint to protect and defend but used in or applied in the wrong manner can bring about much hurt and destruction to all involved.

 

[brYce]

Someone was flirting with the main girl we where pursuing, well, she has a fierce jealous streak. She is jealous for me rather than against me, and she really does not like when any other man is even flirting with a girl she wants for me. That made me pretty happy, and reminded me that jealousy, properly applied, is a good thing.

Well, I don't know the particulars of the situation, but I would like to make an observation.

What if the father of the lady your wife wants for you doesn't want you to marry his daughter? If that woman does not belong to you then how is it right for one of your wives to be jealous in that way? We are commanded to not covet anything that belongs to our neighbours — whether that be his wife, house, or his daughter. If emotions reach the point where there is jealousy it might be approaching the point of coveting and we should guard against it. It is not proper to set our hearts upon something that belongs to another man. This lady is her father's daughter and until she is betrothed to you I don't know that it is proper to let feelings of jealousy enflame.

Perhaps what I've said has nothing to do with the situation, so please ignore it if that's the case. I just thought perhaps it was appropriate for me to say this based on what I understood of the situation you presented. Shalom.

 

[DrRay777]

Very good post, (as usual). Godly jealousy is rooted in love and fleshly jealousy is rooted in selfish fear.

Good topic.

Be blessed,

Ray

 

[Doc]

The Scriptures declare that God is a jealous God, and we are in His image. Not all jealousy is bad.

 

[steve]

i think that the safest place to go with this is to be jealous for YHVH's will in all situations
if we are jealous for what we want it may be against His wishes

 

[Tlaloc]

Of course until she is engaged or actually married to us it is something to keep in check, and this example isn't a the clean cut holy jealousy I intended to describe, but it is a nice foretaste of how she will be protective of the other girls when I'm not around. Lord willing this girl is in His will for us, but until she decides to be it is better to keep in check.

Thanks all for the support and I think Love VS Fear is very much the contrast between good and bad Jealousy.

 

[PolyPride]

While in polygyny we tend to look at jealousy as a bad thing, I think its good to remember that it is not in all cases. Of course it is a problem when women are jealous between each other, when they see each other as competing for a goal rather than sharing a goal. There is a time jealousy is good for women though. For men jealousy is a good thing (provided it paranoid) in terms of position within the family we do not tolerate any rival and we should not.

It was a curious thing, I've been trying to see when my wife would get jealous of me and other women, it seemed impossible to provoke the slightest jealousy (rather, the more I pursued the more she was happy with me for my efforts) I wondered if she even felt jealousy, and then one evening I found she did. Someone was flirting with the main girl we where pursuing, well, she has a fierce jealous streak. She is jealous for me rather than against me, and she really does not like when any other man is even flirting with a girl she wants for me. That made me pretty happy, and reminded me that jealousy, properly applied, is a good thing.

This is very interesting. I have been asking for a while now how do poly-oriented women handle jealousy in relation to another woman their husband is with. Your story is one that I did not expect. Thanks for sharing!