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Immigration Issues

S

SailNdom

New Member
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First, thanks for this great site. I've been struggling with the biblical side of this for awhile and it has been a great resource.

We've started our search for a second wife and have come across somebody in Australia. Normally if I was single we could get married and go through the normal immigration process. But already being married obviously causes some problems.

The only two options I've come up with are:
1. "Divorce" my current wife on paper so I can marry the second wife. I think this would be ok because nothing really dissolves the true marriage. There would actually be a benefit because my current wife works, the new one wants to be a stay at home mom... so being legally married to her would make it where all three of us have health insurance. The only thing I'm concerned with is the whole "submission to the government" thing.
or
2. There's always the option of finding wife # 3 who's a citizen and they get same sex married which then qualifies for immigation. Legally it would work but seems a little too far out there.

Any thoughts or other ideas?
 
Lol at your #2! I fully understand your thinking though ;).
I'm assuming you're in the USA. Have you looked at the new immigration laws? I'm just wondering because Trump is changing a lot of things right now. I'm in New Zealand and people were talking here about it being difficult for us to get in now, even as a tourist, you have to be interviewed or something? I'm honestly not paying too much attention to it right now TBH. Anyway, make sure that even if you did #1, that she could actually still come in.
Option #3 - move to Australia. I know it probably seems a far out idea, but so is her moving to America. Give it some thought as an option too.

And finally, welcome to Biblical Families! We're always glad when new people turn up. And get your wife and girlfriend to join us on the ladies chat on Tuesday nights. Depending on where in Australia your girlfriend is, it will be sometime on Wednesday morning for her. There's also a whole lot of retreats coming up that would be worth attending. We would if we could, but like I said, we're in NZ.
 
I wasn't going to say this, but I changed my mind. How does your wife feel about option #1? It has all kinds of emotions attached to it, and is not as easy as you think. If that's the route you want to go down, then she needs to be 100% sure about it. Make sure you look past what she says, and figure out how she feels, they can be two different things sometimes.
 
Option #4: Find a third country that has easier immigration laws than either the USA or Aussie, or that your circumstances make it easy for you to emigrate to for some reason, and everyone make a clean break and start a fresh life as a plural family in a new country. Lots of thoughtful Americans are watching the signs and getting out at the moment anyway for various reasons, this might be a good motivation to do something like that.
And welcome to the forum!
 
Thanks for the quick replies and the welcome.

Yes I'm in the US. There's a lot of media hype but nothing has changed for legal visitors or immigrants unless you happen to be from a handful of jihadist countries. But yes, he is going to strongly go after ILLEGAL immigrants.

I know what you mean about the difference between what she says and how she really feels, that certainly has come up before.

And I would love to do the boat idea but I don't think my little 27 footer is up to the task lol

So nobody really said anything about if there were biblical problems with either of those, does that mean you think they are ok?
 
See the "Obey government authorities" section of our "Common Objections" article.

Basically, there are no Biblical problems. Provided it's entirely legal to marry, to divorce, and to live as a cohabitating couple (which it generally is), you won't be breaking any laws, so are still submitting to the government.

Having said that, cohabitation without being married is a legal problem in some states in the USA - Utah, Texas, possibly some others, there are some complex laws mainly relating to historical state-sanctioned religious persecution of the Mormon church. Also some states outlaw "adultery" and define it in a way that could technically apply to polygamy. You'll find some starting info in this thread. We have been intending to get articles up on the legal situation in problematic states but haven't managed to do this yet. This has nothing to do with immigration though, or divorce and remarriage, it is purely about living polygamously. The only places in the world with such laws are a very small handful of US states, and all these laws are rarely enforced anyway. If you really really don't want to disobey any tiny detail of the law, and happen to be in one of these states, talk to a good lawyer about how to set up your family in a way that doesn't technically violate them, or move. For instance, if you moved to Aussie to be with your second wife you wouldn't have to think about this issue at all.
 
There are however serious emotional problems with the routes you suggest. These should be top of your mind, far more important than the legal ones. These apply wherever you are in the world, with every woman. They're far more real than any made-up bits of government paperwork.
 
Thanks... looks like I have some more research to do since I do live in Texas and am anchored here pretty well.

I thought I did the research pretty well but didn't really find anything about Texas other than the general law against bigamy. I know that cohabitation can form an informal marriage but as far as I know there isn't a law against it.

I know the emotional part is going to be the hardest to deal with, I wanted to make sure they were real options before seriously considering them or even going too far into getting to know somebody from out of the country.

Thanks again
 
Option #6 Have her get a visa to immigrate for a completely different reason (e.g. employment), not to do with marriage at all.
Maybe you have the right connections to get her a job, or even employ her yourself, in a way that would satisfy your immigration rules?
 
The H-1 visa program (employment) is really hard. I probably do have the connections if she was qualified but that would be a stretch. Besides it takes years and years for a path to citizeship and it's basically a lottery system.

I've had Au Pair's and those visas are only good a year but can be extended for another year.

Basically both those options would just get her but she'd either have to go back or end up as an illegal. If that was all it took then she can just jump on a plane and never go back. But then that's a whole box of worms.

I'm wondering if option #1 but have my current wife marry her might ease some of the emotional part. At least she couldn't say she wasn't supportive lol
 
You have me thinking here, though.
With medical insurance rates continuing to go sky high, it makes one have to start thinking of alternatives.

I could legally (not spiritually) divorce my first, and take legal custody of kids.
Then, my first could marry the second and have each other covered, while I have myself and kids covered.

The savings could potentially be thousands per year!!!
 
SailNdom said:
I'm wondering if option #1 but have my current wife marry her might ease some of the emotional part.
Click to expand...
I would expect that to make the emotions a whole lot worse, because not only are you expecting her to give up her legal marriage, you're then expecting her on top of that to be the one to actually make your second marriage happen, going through a lot of legal paperwork and lying on it in order to primarily benefit you (you're the one actually getting married). I think your wife will have enough stress on her plate already without adding this on top of it. It's an option to consider, but I highly doubt it's the best one to decide upon.

But just to jump back to your original post for a moment:
SailNdom said:
We've started our search for a second wife and have come across somebody in Australia.
Click to expand...
Have you just happened to come across this woman online and haven't met her in person yet? If so, then forget about all of this until you get to know each other better. It might be that all this is premature and you're going to decide not to face this issue anyway.
 
FollowingHim said:
But just to jump back to your original post for a moment:

Have you just happened to come across this woman online and haven't met her in person yet? If so, then forget about all of this until you get to know each other better. It might be that all this is premature and you're going to decide not to face this issue anyway.
Click to expand...

Was thinking the same thing...but was afraid to bring it up.
 
Its kind of the chicken and the egg... I see what you mean by it might not be an issue at all but it was also nice to explore so that I know there are viable options and therefore worth getting to know her better.
 
Fair enough. The answer is that there are many options, so if it is YHWH's will it will work. With that assurance, proceed to figuring out if it is His will! :)
 
Just as an aside, sorry it's not totally related to the op, but I have often wondered on this same issue and the resources I just received in reading this post were extremely helpful so I wanted to thank you all for being so thorough.
 
Hey what solution did you find?
I'm curious because if I ever want to return to the states with my 2 foreign wives your solution may provide an answer or part of an answer for us.
For now our family is stuck here.
 
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