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General Jayne New Start in Florida

J

Jayne

New Member
Hi I'm Jayne. A few years back my brother in law announced he was taking a second wife. It was rough situation, he comes from a very active church family. THey did not except it very well. His first wife left. He is still with the second looking to add another. I however seemed to keep an open mind. LOL my husband supported his brother but did not agree also. I think God was preparing me even then for what was to come. Over the years we have made jokes about it, until this past March, he made the joke but his voice was different. I remember the tone, so well. He asked me if God told me to would I allow it. I said yes, I Knew instantly there was someone on his mind. He said he believed God Had brought a lady into his life. She had no clue. We talked and prayed for a month. God still left it on both of us. So he approached her and asked her to dinner. I felt nervous, He was like a teenager overthinking his first date. Poor guy told her i do not want to date you i want to marry you. To our surprise she Listened and took it into consideration. We have had ups and downs, I have definitely failed at being perfect though this, I did not want to be mean or mistreat her. I did not want to be like my ex-sister-in-law. But i did not realize how it would hurt watching him be so happy. i actually had a few mental breakdowns, thinking he just wanted her. I left a couple of time, but both my husband and her talked me into coming back. She struggles with my leaving that it was her fault. In all reality it was my husband seemed happier with her and i didn't want to ruin things between them. We have been married for 28 years, we have 4 kids, 5 grandbabies. We have never struggled being married. but i never had been remotely second in his life. I did not think he could love her more than me. But i told myself he did I now realize. He loves us both! He wants both! She has from day one felt like a sister. We have a lot in common. i believe she loves him. Its getting better, our kids seem to be doing well with it. Some friends not so much. Surprisingly we have found a few who were already looking into this. I believe God is calling men to take on wives for a reason. Its not an easy path but i am willing to do my best. I'm sure i will fail more, all of us will. But we will keep pushing through! Prayer and Studying have been my biggest strength! Thankful i found a source of learning, sharing. I just want other to know were in the same situation and we can help build each other.
 
Hi @Jayne, and welcome to Biblical Families. Thank you for opening your heart and sharing the story of your journey into polygyny. There are many here who find these testimonies a blessing to read. May God continue to strengthen you and your family as you walk together. Shalom
 
We can choose to walk in the truth, or we can choose to continue living a lie. Most people will prefer the lie. Paul said - if I'm trying to please men - I wouldn't be a servant of Christ. And he was physically persecuted for preaching the truth. He lost a lot of friends. But he made a decision. Likewise - we may be asked to leave our 501c3 church. We may lose family and friends. But in the end of the day - truth is truth. Yahushua (Jesus) said people will hate you for his sake, and he is the Word made flesh. He prayed for all of his future believers - that we would be cleansed by the Word of the Most High. That sanctification can take time -- especially if we've inherited lies from our fathers (Jeremiah 16:19) - and we've indeed inherited big lies.

But I'm happy he's lead you to this truth, and you've come to accept it. I also believe the Most High is leading more of his faithful servants into this truth, because the women out there need help. They need to be washed clean by the Word. They need husbands that will take care of them and the children.
 
Welcome, I’m glad that you have found us!
Yes, it’s not all peaches and cream, but it builds the Kingdom.
 
Shalom and welcome
 
Welcome! Happy you are here. I hope your husband and sister wife join also. It would be great to hear from all three of you.

Be sure to check out our ladies chat on Tuesday evenings 7:30 EST. You can find the information under the Ladies Only thread.
 
Jayne said:
Hi I'm Jayne. A few years back my brother in law announced he was taking a second wife. It was rough situation, he comes from a very active church family. THey did not except it very well. His first wife left. He is still with the second looking to add another. I however seemed to keep an open mind. LOL my husband supported his brother but did not agree also. I think God was preparing me even then for what was to come. Over the years we have made jokes about it, until this past March, he made the joke but his voice was different. I remember the tone, so well. He asked me if God told me to would I allow it. I said yes, I Knew instantly there was someone on his mind. He said he believed God Had brought a lady into his life. She had no clue. We talked and prayed for a month. God still left it on both of us. So he approached her and asked her to dinner. I felt nervous, He was like a teenager overthinking his first date. Poor guy told her i do not want to date you i want to marry you. To our surprise she Listened and took it into consideration. We have had ups and downs, I have definitely failed at being perfect though this, I did not want to be mean or mistreat her. I did not want to be like my ex-sister-in-law. But i did not realize how it would hurt watching him be so happy. i actually had a few mental breakdowns, thinking he just wanted her. I left a couple of time, but both my husband and her talked me into coming back. She struggles with my leaving that it was her fault. In all reality it was my husband seemed happier with her and i didn't want to ruin things between them. We have been married for 28 years, we have 4 kids, 5 grandbabies. We have never struggled being married. but i never had been remotely second in his life. I did not think he could love her more than me. But i told myself he did I now realize. He loves us both! He wants both! She has from day one felt like a sister. We have a lot in common. i believe she loves him. Its getting better, our kids seem to be doing well with it. Some friends not so much. Surprisingly we have found a few who were already looking into this. I believe God is calling men to take on wives for a reason. Its not an easy path but i am willing to do my best. I'm sure i will fail more, all of us will. But we will keep pushing through! Prayer and Studying have been my biggest strength! Thankful i found a source of learning, sharing. I just want other to know were in the same situation and we can help build each other.
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Welcome to the party. Very glad to have more successful plyg families on deck even if there were a few struggles.
I very much appreciate the positive attitude and your position with respect to a calling.

The world is going very very weird and we need more than ever to build big strong families
 
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Shalom and welcome!
 
Jayne said:
Hi I'm Jayne. A few years back my brother in law announced he was taking a second wife. It was rough situation, he comes from a very active church family. THey did not except it very well. His first wife left. He is still with the second looking to add another. I however seemed to keep an open mind. LOL my husband supported his brother but did not agree also. I think God was preparing me even then for what was to come. Over the years we have made jokes about it, until this past March, he made the joke but his voice was different. I remember the tone, so well. He asked me if God told me to would I allow it. I said yes, I Knew instantly there was someone on his mind. He said he believed God Had brought a lady into his life. She had no clue. We talked and prayed for a month. God still left it on both of us. So he approached her and asked her to dinner. I felt nervous, He was like a teenager overthinking his first date. Poor guy told her i do not want to date you i want to marry you. To our surprise she Listened and took it into consideration. We have had ups and downs, I have definitely failed at being perfect though this, I did not want to be mean or mistreat her. I did not want to be like my ex-sister-in-law. But i did not realize how it would hurt watching him be so happy. i actually had a few mental breakdowns, thinking he just wanted her. I left a couple of time, but both my husband and her talked me into coming back. She struggles with my leaving that it was her fault. In all reality it was my husband seemed happier with her and i didn't want to ruin things between them. We have been married for 28 years, we have 4 kids, 5 grandbabies. We have never struggled being married. but i never had been remotely second in his life. I did not think he could love her more than me. But i told myself he did I now realize. He loves us both! He wants both! She has from day one felt like a sister. We have a lot in common. i believe she loves him. Its getting better, our kids seem to be doing well with it. Some friends not so much. Surprisingly we have found a few who were already looking into this. I believe God is calling men to take on wives for a reason. Its not an easy path but i am willing to do my best. I'm sure i will fail more, all of us will. But we will keep pushing through! Prayer and Studying have been my biggest strength! Thankful i found a source of learning, sharing. I just want other to know were in the same situation and we can help build each other.
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Thank you for sharing your experiences. My growing family lives in FL near tampa. Hold fast!
 
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