Love Times Three book critique

[Diener]

Please take my critique with a grain of salt. I have never lived in a plural family and am a total NUB at living such a calling.

Pros:
Pretty honest about personal struggles
Fairly transparent with how relationships work
Has input from some of the older children
Lots of integrity displayed as to why they are speaking out

Cons: (clearly these are based on person preferences on my part)
The wives appear to be in charge
The biggest reason they get along is because they all knew each other for a long time
All the marriages are separate (He has to please each one instead of them pleasing him)
They seem to be bending to editorial pressure to water down their beliefs and goals in order to get published (not sure on this one, but they seem to compromise a lot on their ideals for their children and how they do things for the sake of being socially acceptable).


I love how they have been honest about a lot of their struggles and how they try to resolve them. I don't always agree with how they handled them, since I tend to be very husband centered. I guess I would probably fit in more with the ideals of the FLDS on how to treat a husband than the IFLDS. That is why it is SOOOOOOO important to choose a husband wisely by prayer!

There were things in this book I would never do. There are things in this book that made me cry and want to "heal" them. There were things in this book that made me aspire to be like them. It was worth reading! Even if all you do is learn more about yourself, it is worth reading. People that have lived the life and made it work are worth hearing out.

 

[Chaplain]

Chaplains Cajun Rose aka Chaplains Rose and I also read the book. I will let her write her views if she wishes but here are mine. I enjoyed the book over all and think it was a good read. I would suggest for those wishing to live or who already are living in a PM read the book. I agree that I think their relationship seems for the most part all "Rosy" because they all, at least the wives did, knew each other from childhood. They had the benefit of having been exposed to this life style from an early age thus it seemed almost natural for them to live this way unlike the majority of us who are finding out about this via revelation from the Lord. I would though like to have them been a little more informative on how issues were really handled and not, in my opinion, glossed over. I would also like to have seen more about how the wives themselves handled personal issues between themselves. The husband, though he does add to the story, seems a bit shy or leary about sharing more of his personal side which would Include more on how he handled serious issues within the family. I guess I was looking for more in-depth sharing about how issues, struggles and situations were handled. Guess that will be in the next book they write. All in all I still enjoyed the book and would recommend it be read by others. Chaplains Cajun Rose is thinking about letting the lady I was courting read it and get her take on it.

 

[Diener]

Yes, I agree that they avoided getting to deeply involved in how all the major issues were handled. The book makes it look like it was just a matter of letting "time heal all wounds". I do believe that if you don't give up on a relationship, that time often does help to heal things (as long as there are serious recurring problems that are happening).

And Joe did seem rather shy. I wasn't sure if that was to avoid angering the women that might read the book or because he really isn't the one that determines how things will be run. He seemed to mostly be a way for all these women to have things the way they wanted when it came to running a plural marriage, though I wouldn't say that they got to have their lives the way they wanted them to be all the time. Just seems like Joe got the short end of the stick. He doesn't seem like a patriarch, but more like the boat they sail on.

Anyway, I have to wrap it up and go tend to the 18 year old now.

 

[steve]

He doesn't seem like a patriarch, but more like the boat they sail on.

with a description like that i may have to get the book