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More Comfortable With...
- Thread starter Doc
- Start date
Well... are you looking for a good reason?
There is no good reason, but as far as I can see the logic is something like this:
At least the adulterer is trying (or at least appearing) to be monogamous - sure they stuffed up, but they haven't divorced their wife, and maybe we can help them see the error of their ways and be faithful to her again. God can forgive them, she can forgive him, and everything can be ok again one day.
But the polygamist has made a commitment to the second woman too. He actually intends to keep "cheating" on his wife for the rest of his life. This isn't just a short-term mistake, it's a whole life of "sin".
At least the adulterer is trying (or at least appearing) to be monogamous - sure they stuffed up, but they haven't divorced their wife, and maybe we can help them see the error of their ways and be faithful to her again. God can forgive them, she can forgive him, and everything can be ok again one day.
But the polygamist has made a commitment to the second woman too. He actually intends to keep "cheating" on his wife for the rest of his life. This isn't just a short-term mistake, it's a whole life of "sin".
I believe it is much simpler than you all make it. With adultery it is easy to "look the other way" and pretend nothing happened, making your life appear normal and therefore not bring attention to yourself. If you participate in a polygamous relationship you are saying that you walk to a different beat. You don't follow the "party line" and this makes everyone uncomfortable.
If you tell people you are different from them they might criticise you. They might judge you. They might fire you. They might talk about you. They might feel that you think you are better than they are.
For most it is easier just to conform to the rest of the world than to struggle to think for his or herself.
SweetLissa
If you tell people you are different from them they might criticise you. They might judge you. They might fire you. They might talk about you. They might feel that you think you are better than they are.
For most it is easier just to conform to the rest of the world than to struggle to think for his or herself.
SweetLissa
I think one of the big issues is that Adultery is so prevalent in society. People have become used to it's presence and chalked it up as almost "an unavoidable permanent fixture of society".
Comments like: "Boys will be boys" and the like suggest to me a general cultural feeling that guys will try to do what "guys do". I think the point of divergence is the idea that with adultery, it's like guys trying to sneak cookies from the cookie jar, and sometimes they get caught and sometimes they don't, but they will try... as opposed to polygamy where the women, as free, intelligent, and high self-esteemed individuals, would go along with it.
Or summed up: The perceived game is thus: "The woman has to try to keep the guy for herself, while the guy has to try to get as many women as possible... and in a polygamous situation, she must have just given up."
Oh well...
trying to explain monogamy only to me must be like trying to explain the acceptability of polygamy to others... "It simply does not compute."
Comments like: "Boys will be boys" and the like suggest to me a general cultural feeling that guys will try to do what "guys do". I think the point of divergence is the idea that with adultery, it's like guys trying to sneak cookies from the cookie jar, and sometimes they get caught and sometimes they don't, but they will try... as opposed to polygamy where the women, as free, intelligent, and high self-esteemed individuals, would go along with it.
Or summed up: The perceived game is thus: "The woman has to try to keep the guy for herself, while the guy has to try to get as many women as possible... and in a polygamous situation, she must have just given up."
Oh well...
trying to explain monogamy only to me must be like trying to explain the acceptability of polygamy to others... "It simply does not compute."
Why buy the cow when the milk is free. I think that a lot of adulaters would never dream of taking on another wife but wouldn't mind getting some extra 'tail'. I'm from generation x, threesomes are common place. I have said during hypothetical conversations, "I don't do threesomes, it hurts her. Find another woman to love and care for that's ok with me. Using someone is not." I don't think cheats are looking for more love just some action. Men have not cornered the mark on adultery. Wives often cheat on there husbands and there is no biblical basis for polyandry. I still can't figure why society is more comfortable with it. Some of the statements here have outlined likely contributors.
1) Adulatory is a temporary laps of judgment = A forgivable sin.
2) Polygamy is a commitment = A life of sin. (we don't agree do we : - )
3) Things that are different scare people.
4) Woman who are in a plural marriage are being abused/brainwashed
5) FLDS is creepy (I agree)
6) last but not least, many bible believing christians are just miss informed about the scripture on this subject.
1) Adulatory is a temporary laps of judgment = A forgivable sin.
2) Polygamy is a commitment = A life of sin. (we don't agree do we : - )
3) Things that are different scare people.
4) Woman who are in a plural marriage are being abused/brainwashed
5) FLDS is creepy (I agree)
6) last but not least, many bible believing christians are just miss informed about the scripture on this subject.
DocInKorea said:
18 “If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first.
John 15:18 NIV
Because it is contrary to God's standard as appropriate for people who hate God