I hope I am not off subject here, but as to relationship bubbles and polygynous man sharing, I am a firm believer in each lady having her own dwelling (bedroom, bathroom, kitchen and living room) based on my own polygynous experience, based on the research of anthropologists/ethnologists (see my file/document at the sites given below) - - - - -
Keys2SuccessfulBiblicalPoly - Improved
REVISED: Some Anthropological and Biblical Thoughts on Biblical
Christian Polygyny/polygamy. Some Keys to Successful Biblical Polygyny
COPYRIGHT © October 25, 2003, revised 07/02/08 All rights reserved.
by R. L. Tyler
- - - - - - - - - and based on the experience of successful modern polygynists like the Indian Princess/Maharanni, Devi, also found in the Files/Document section of the groups listed below:
A PRINCESS REMEMBERS
The Memoirs of the Maharani of Jaipur
by Gyatri Devi of Jaipur and Rama Rau
J.B. Lippincott Co.; New York, 1972
REVIEW COPYRIGHT JANUARY 14, 2005; updated June 11, 2005 All rights reserved.
The Maharani of Jaipur, Gayatri Devi, was a thoroughly 20th
century, modern, well educated in England, intelligent and lovely
Indian lady,-- and a polygynist. Her grandparents' palace home was
divided into two parts, each with its own entrance. There were
the "zenana quarters for the women" so that the only men who
would see the women of the family were the husband and the
male members of the immediate family. The Moslems
introduced the custom in the 12th century and many rich and
noble families adopted the custom from the 16th century through
the 20th century. [A Princess Remembers, p.18]
When the Maharani's husband, Jai, first married, an arranged
marriage, his wife was located in the "zenana apartments in the
City palace" but Jai lived in the countryside palace five minutes
away and only saw her when he visited the City palace. The
zenana ladies would often picnic in his country palace, attended
by their maids, which was famous for its beautiful gardens.
[APR, pp 100,101]
It is so much easier and less stressful for each wife to have her own place, and when another wife comes on board, nothing changes in each wife's little private domain, greatly adding to their sense of security and stability.
I believe the first wife should support her husband if he is led to marry yet another, at least in prayer in fasting.
It is best if the present wives are in harmony and unity with their husband if he seeks yet another wife, but that
is an EXTREMELY RARE occurrence. Wives are plagues by fears and insecurities, fear of losing their relationship with
their man, fear of being loved less, being less desired, less needed. With divorce and separation so common today
the temptation to feel insecure in the relationship is very real.
Personally I believe that the polygynist is extremely FOOLISH if he is passionately committed to honoring the principles
of Ex 21, Prov 5 and 1 Cor 7
***21:10 If he takes ANOTHER WIFE to himself, her food, clothing, and conjugal privilege{5772} as a wife he shall not diminish.
[Strong's {5772} `ownah, o-naw'; meaning to dwell together; sexual (cohabitation): — duty of marriage.]
***7:2 but because of and to avoid sexual immorality each man should be [sexually] having his own woman, and each woman should be [sexually] having her own man. . . .4. The woman doesn't have [sexual] authority over her own body, but the husband [does]; in like manner also the man doesn't have [sexual] authority over his own body, but the woman [does]. 5 Do not be denying each other [sexually], unless, it may be, by consent for a time, that you may devote yourselves to fasting and prayer, and again be conjugally cohabiting [sexually reuniting], that Satan tempt you not because of your incontinence
******Prov. 5:18 Your fountain/genital should be blessed; and rejoice and be glad with the wife of your youth. 19 . . . her breasts should satisfy/intoxicate/saturate you at all times; you should be intoxicated continually with her [sexual] loving
If I were the wife of a Biblical polygynist and he was not totally committed to abiding by these principles, I would not trust him, would be greatly tempted to fear and insecurity, and would throw myself into fasting prayer for him and his desire. If he is a godly man and is committed to the principles in the Scriptures above, then the challenge to his current wives is to live according to
***Eph 4:1I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, 2with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, 3eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.
My experience in seeking another wife has not followed any set path, other than calling on Jesus to lead me and guide me, trusting Him to work and will in me His work and will in the matter. Even to this day we have only the most tenuous hold on the Ephes 4:1-3 experience. My ladies have all had great difficulties with the "wives submit yourselves to your husbands in everything as unto the Lord" experience. As to the Eph 5:33 "the wife see that she respects her husband" principle, when they get disrespectful they find themselves talking either to my back or to an empty room. As to my Lady A, I was without a wife at the time and was sparrowing about seeking the wife that Jesus would provide, after I had committed myself to marry whoever He chose no matter how I felt about her. He miraculously brought us together and told her to marry me. Then there was Lady B who I met and befriended in a supermarket on a cold and rainy night, who said she would be my concubine, did not want to end my relationship with Lady A, after Lady A had kicked me out over an dispute re her kids. Then there was Lady C who I met at a supermarket with her kids, hired her to be my once a week housekeeper, and with whom I fell in love while still separated from Lady A, and separated by 120 miles from Lady B. Lady C said she would be my concubine, did not want to end my relationship with Lady A. Lady A had told me that she would divorce me in a year if I didn't measure up to her standards, and Lady C came on board with only 8 months left before Lady A's "D" day. I met Lady D walking on the side walk in El Centro in 110 degree temperatures, invited her to lunch. Two weeks later she accepted my luncheon invitation and months later she let me know she wanted to be my Lady. She readily and willingly committed to sharing me with Lady A when Lady A and I reconciled after five years of on again off again separation. Lady A accepts Lady D because she is such a godly and committed Christian lady. Both Lady A and Lady D don't like Lady C and want her to stay out of the pictures because she is spiritually such a loose cannon. Lady B wanted her privacy more than me and she bailed after five years. My way is not the recommended way to seek and find another wife, but it certainly reflects real life.
One of the main things that gives me great pause when the thought of marrying another wife is Exod 21:10 and Elihu's experience with it:
###Elihu starts off having marital intimacy three times a week with his wife, Sabrina.
### When ELIHU takes himself another [wife] , Hortensia, his wife Sabrina's food, clothing, their intimate duty of marriage shall not be lessened. This means that three nights he has marital intimacy with Lulu and three nights he has marital intimacy with Hortensia. He draws up and has notarized a LLC to protect and care for his family.
THEN
###When ELIHU takes himself another [wife] , Safronia, he knows that the food, clothing, and intimate duty of marriage of his wives ---Hortensia and Sabrina --- shall not be lessened. So now six nights he has marital intimacy with Lulu and Hortensia, one night and two weekend afternoons of intimacy with Safronia. They have a rotating schedule that determines who he sleeps with each night.
Everybody spends most of the time together Saturdays and Sundays, picnicking, swimming, hiking, singing, dancing and going from house to house potlucking. Safronia is added to the LLC, and they qualify for a small group medical and dental insurance plan.
THEN
###When ELIHU takes himself another [wife] , Mary Lou, he knows that the food, clothing, and intimate duty of marriage of his wives ---Safronia, Hortensia and Sabrina --- shall not be lessened. So now he has to split three of his evenings, having a couple of hours of after dinner marital intimacy with two of his wives for three nights, and after nine marital intimacy with one of his wives three nights a week. He finally gets to sleep at 11. They have a rotating schedule that determines who he sleeps with each night. By now two of his wives have paying jobs and he is able to cut pack his work to 3/4 time. He has obtained a Viagra prescription. Mary Lou is added to the LLC and the small group medical and dental insurance plan. Everybody spends most of the time together Saturdays and Sundays, picnicking, swimming, hiking, singing, dancing and going from house to house potlucking.
THEN
###When ELIHU takes himself another [wife], Harriet, he knows that the food, clothing, and intimate duty of marriage of his wives ---Mary Lou, Safronia, Hortensia and Sabrina --- shall not be lessened. So now he has to split six of his evenings, having a couple of hours of after dinner marital intimacy with two of his wives for three nights, and after nine marital intimacy with two of his wives three nights a week. He finally gets to sleep at 11. They have a rotating schedule that determines who he sleeps with each night. By now three of his wives have paying jobs, two are taking care of the children and he is able to cut pack his work to 1/2 time. Harriet is added to the LLC and the small group medical and dental insurance plan. Everybody spends most of the time together Saturdays and Sundays, picnicking, swimming, hiking, singing, dancing and going from house to house potlucking. They have purchased a ten unit apartment/townhouse complex, each wife having her own apartment in the complex.
THEN
###When ELIHU takes himself another [wife], Betty Lou, and he knows that the food, clothing, the intimate duty of marriage of his wives ---Harriet, Mary Lou, Safronia, Hortensia and Sabrina --- shall not be lessened. So now he has to split seven of his evenings, having a couple of hours of after dinner marital intimacy with two of his wives for three nights, after nine marital intimacy with two of his wives three nights a week, and Sat and Sunday morning intimacy with his wives. He finally gets to sleep at 11 and sleeps until 7. They have a rotating schedule that determines who he sleeps with each night. By now four of his wives have paying jobs, two are caring for the children and he is able to cut pack his work to 1/2 time. He had to get a medicated lotion from the doctor to soothe the irritation of the skin on his genital. Betty Lou is added to the LLC and the small group medical and dental insurance plan. Everybody spends most of the time together Saturdays and Sundays, picnicking, swimming, hiking, singing, dancing and going from house to house potlucking.
THEN
###When ELIHU takes himself another [wife], Scherazade, and he knows that the food, clothing, the intimate duty of marriage of his wives ---Betty Lou, Harriet, Mary Lou, Safronia, Hortensia and Sabrina --- shall not be lessened. So now he has 3-5 pm marital intimacy with one of his wives three times a week before dinner, has to split seven of his evenings, having a couple of hours of after dinner marital intimacy with two of his wives for three nights, after nine marital intimacy with two of his wives three nights a week each, and Sat and Sunday morning intimacy with his wives. He finally gets to sleep at 11 and sleeps until 7. They have a rotating schedule that determines who he sleeps with each night. By now four of his wives have paying jobs, three are caring for and homeschooling the children and he is able to cut pack his work to on call consultant work. He continues to have to use medicated lotion from the doctor to soothe the irritation of the skin on his genital, but now also has to have a prescription to help him deal with his lower back pain and spasms. Sherazade is added to the LLC and the small group medical and dental insurance plan. Everybody spends most of the time together Saturdays and Sundays, picnicking, swimming, hiking, singing, dancing and going from house to house potlucking.
THEN
###When ELIHU takes himself another [wife], Mizriamine, he knows that the food, clothing, and intimate duty of marriage of his wives ---Scherazade, Betty Lou, Harriet, Mary Lou, Safronia, Hortensia and Sabrina --- shall not be lessened. So now he has 3-5 pm marital intimacy with one of his wives six times a week before dinner, has to split seven of his evenings, having a couple of hours of after dinner marital intimacy with two of his wives for three nights, after nine marital intimacy with two of his wives three nights a week each, and Sat and Sunday morning intimacy with his wives. He finally gets to sleep at 11 and sleeps until 7. They have a rotating schedule that determines who he sleeps with each night. By now five of his wives have paying jobs, three are caring for and homeschooling the children and he no longer works for pay and helps home school his children. He continues to have to use medicated lotion from the doctor to soothe the irritation of the skin on his genital, but now also has to have a prescription to help him deal with his lower back pain and spasms. Mizriamine is added to the LLC and the small group medical and dental insurance plan. Everybody spends most of the time together Saturdays and Sundays, picnicking, swimming, hiking, singing, dancing and going from house to house potlucking.
###THEN Mizriamine,-Scherazade, Betty Lou, Harriet, Mary Lou, Safronia, Hortensia and Sabrina get to go to Elihu's funeral, Elihu having died of heart failure while performing intimate duties of marriage, dying with a tired smile on his face. After mourning his wives had a beach party and Bar-B-Q with assorted wine coolers, mourning, singing and dancing until the late hours of the night. At that time they decided to start a child care and home schooling center, and look around for Elihu's replacement.
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/OrthodoxB ... gePolygamy
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/PolyPolygamyPolygnyNJesus
http://biblicalmarriagepolygyny.yuku.com/forums/66
http://www.scribd.com/people/documents/ ... nnie-tyler
http://www.flickr.com/groups/christian_polygyny/ -
http://www.flickr.com/groups/christian_polygamy/
http://www.shtyle.fm/community.do?cid=41185
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/BlackPolygyny/
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/BrownPeop ... anPolygamy
http://biblicalmarriagepolygamypolygyny.webs.com/
http://groups.google.com/group/polygamo ... s_of_tyler
http://meetup.com/SanDiegoChristianPolygyny
