Something @rockfox & @andrew mentioned which I've been thinking about for a while I'd just like to nuance; the concept of our wives actually helping us to accomplish more in our life mission.
In the past, I've argued against the whole "women should not speak in church" bit from the perspective that women in the first century were illiterate and as such did not know scripture; that's also why it was a shame for them to be instructing fellas who often did know scripture. I see this changing dynamic in play here.
In the first century, the dynamic of how much time having a family took away from a righteous man who cared that the kids were instructed properly (i.e. he needed to teach them the bible himself or hire tutors he trusted since the women couldn't do it) is quite possibly/probably different than the dynamic in the first world today.
The women folk today certainly are capable (often moreso) of teaching scripture to kiddlets and shuttling people around (back in the day this was looked on as sinful if a woman was transporting people around without a man), etc. so it very well may be the case a well managed household with many ladies today is more capable of -insert whatever congregational mission/office you want here- than they would have been back in the day. If you went to Afghanistan today and that's where you got your wives from and they are illiterate, it's kind of hard to get them to make the powerpoint slides for the worship music lyrics... you gotta do it all yourself men.
The helpmeetery (inspired by @Slumberfreeze propensity to coin terms) may have been much less back then than today.
Not sure if I expressed that as succinctly as I would of liked but I think this accents the value of proper exegesis; not only understanding linguistically what's going on in the text but also the audience, and what they were dealing with culturally so we can import that to what we are dealing with culturally today; it's very very very different today. our womenfolk know a lot more today than they were allowed to know back then. One of the beautiful things about biblical plural marriage is the very fact that we can select wives who bring different skills and blessings to the family.
So while I actually come in with @Slumberfreeze and @Shibboleth in understanding the text to literally be saying the guy needs to have no more than 1 wife; I see we have the freedom to move in certain areas when we extrapolate out the reasoning for such a restriction (offices were either lowly for guys who are patriarchs [you don't stick a CEO in an internship position] or too time-consuming based on the culture of the day). I've come to the conclusion we have the freedom to move in these areas as our households are in order; of course checking with the holy spirit and carefully considering as it seems our default positions should be "don't do it" but the spirit of the command is the most important here combined with what is most edifying for the kingdom. To sideline righteous men who have their stuff in order because we're trying to letter-of-the-law a verse which is quite difficult to exegete is really missing the point. That said, I think the fella who can manage his wives/kids so well that they take less of his time rather than more is the exception to the rule (I'm talking to you Andrew)
To be fair, polygamists back in the day also have a heck of a lot more kids than we do today. Think 12+
**disclaimer - I'm not advocating female pastors, just commenting on general silence in the assembly vs being able to comment / ask questions also being able to lead when capable men aren't around visa vi Deborah. I hope we won't spiral off topic into that subject.
First I want to say if your using the Letter of scripture as an assassin's dagger to condem others and justify yourself instead of as a sword to protect and guide the faithful of G-d yes it's Legalistic. Using the letter of scripture to fend off the ever growing Abyss that is our Changing world is not Legalistic.
Let me tell you a story of a man name Jed, a poor believer who could barely keep his spirit fed. Went to a church that claimed to be spirit led. He had a conversation with a Deacon, said I don't know what's wrong here but something is missin'.
Deacon Jimbo said "Jed nothing's missing, we have programs for the kids, the best praise and worship show, we just added a fog machine, Sunday bible study where we are taught about the Holy Spirit and how to let it guide us, Monday women's meeting where they do whatever they do you know, happy wife happy life, Tuesday men's meeting where we talk about how the Holy Spirit is working in our life, Wednesday Christian book club where discuss Christian beleifs in pop culture, Thursday outreach meetings where we discuss how to make the Church more appealing to nonbelievers, Friday the Elders do financial planing and listen to concerns of the congregation. We have it all."
Friday Jed show up to speak with the Elders. Jed explains that he is uncomfortable with the lack of studying and promoting adherence to scripture in their Church. Pastor Richard Cranium said," Times are changing its a different world now than it was then. It's Legalistic to try to hold the congregation of a Church to follow what scripture says. It's too restrictive. We only need scripture to show us the story of Jesus. We don't need scripture to tell us how to live. We have the Holy Spirit to guide us. " Jed says, "What happens when the Holy Spirit leads us in a way that conflicts with scripture?" Pastor Richard Cranium replies "Just come to me, as the Pastor I'm the one given Authority of the flock and tell you what is proper to beleive.
Two weeks later the congregation is on a charter bus going to a crusade when it wrecks and everyone dies. They're standing in a line for what seems like eternity. Jed ask Pastor Richard Cranium what's taking so long. Pastor Richard Cranium walks over to the Apostle Peter and say "Maître d' when will the seats at the table be ready for me and My congregation?" The Apostle Peter looks at his list and replies "Theres no reservation for you and your congregation." Pastor Richard Cranium demanded to speak with some one in authority. A Man calmly walks up and asks what's the problem. Pastor Richard Cranium yells " I don't know who you are or what your trying to pull here. I'm a Pastor I have lead my flock according to the guidance of Holy Spirit, I have prophesied in Jesus name, and in His name driven out demons and perform many miracles. I demand my seat at the table" The man calmly yet sternly replies "Your right you don't know me and I know you not."
Yes we have the Holy Spirit to guide us. Yes we need to take the spirit of the Law to Heart. We also need to know the Letter of the Law to understand it. Rauch Hakodesh will never lead you to compromise scripture for a changing world. If you being lead to adapt how G-d ,through the Holy Spirit, told us in scripture how to live our lives because the world is changing, it's not the Holy Spirit leading.
This is not a Torah VS No Torah arguement. It equally applies to the directions given by Rauch Hakodesh in works of the Apostles. This is why I believe it's important to understand what scripture is actually saying. This is not directed at @IshChayil but inspire by his post.
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