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Polygyny or Harlotry

anapaedobaptist

anapaedobaptist

New Member
I was recently watching a documentary on the issue of whether or not to legalize paid harlotry, and over and over again one particular statement/idea was made/presented. This documentary had many flaws and I haven't even finished it yet, but their argument was that these certain women have no way to make a living for themselves, and because their "profession" is illegal, it makes it more dangerous for them. So the statement that kept appearing was that these women are doing what they do, mainly because they would have no way to be taken care of otherwise.

Would not it make a lot more sense for these women to marry into a family and be taken care of the right way? Do you think that this is an area where polygyny would be an answer, or would the problem be equally solved if these women simply married any man, whether that man was married already or not? Or do you think that maybe these women prefer to do what they are doing and would rather do that than being married and in subjection to a husband?

I have always had a heart for those who are downtrodden and not being care for. I wouldn't mind taking a woman who is currently in, or even is just thinking about selling herself off to make a living, and taking care of her. What are your thoughts on the subject? If this were an option, what would be the proper way to go about trying to rescue these women?

James
 
That's a toughie man. I think if you found 20 women in that situation you'd find 20 different answers. I know I've met at least one homeless girl many years ago (not a prostitute) who basically dreamed of being a housewife, so there may well be some out there that would see polygyny as a solution. However I think you'd find many that would meet the suggestion with scorn as well.

You also have to consider there can also be a host of other issues. From drug addictions to STDs to violent tendencies, a woman coming out of that background could be a danger to your current family. Not saying she isn't worth being redeemed or anything, just saying it could be a very complex issue. I'd maybe think it would be better to help them get clean and stable first, before bringing polygyny into it, but that's more up to you and your family.

I do agree that it would be better to be in a poly family than be a street walker, but that seems like easy math to me. Personally, I doubt I could handle that though.
 
As I read the original post, I kept thinking of the prophet Hosea. It might be worth reading the book of Hosea in contemplation of this.

I would say that polygyny is a potential prevention or even rescue for some women, but not for all of them and you'd have to be prepared to help her through a variety of relational issues. I have heard that a great many female prostitutes are women who were sexually abused as children and being a prostitute sometimes gives them a sense of power and control that they would not have in a marriage where they submit to a husband. Submission and trust (both vital to healthy marriages) are difficult things for anyone who's been abused. Just ask any foster parent out there.

Also, there are many young ladies, young men, girls, and boys who do not choose prostitution but are, in fact, sex slaves. Rescuing them means dealing with their pimps/owners. For more information on that you can check out the End It movement or the I've Got a Name organization.

I am aware of these organizations because the enslavement of girls for the sex trade is something that touches my heart deeply. All children should have a childhood, in my opinion. I knew it was going on in many African and Asian countries, but it turns out that it happens here, too.

What all of these people need, is the touch of Jesus, the training and opportunity to do something else, and time to heal.
 
We have to look at this critically. STD's are something very serious....not just with prostitutes but with main stream america, they cause extra medical bills with pregnancies. Pregnancy hormones make genital warts grow gangbusters in some cases so much so that they can obstruct the birth canal and cause less elasticity. They can also cause issues for the woman in the sense of not being able to urinate very easily. That is a huge deal for a pregnant lady! Even with medical procedures to try to take care of this, c-section may be needed.

Higher cost may seem like nothing, but even Herpes can kill or make babies under 6 months retarded. 90 plus percent of Americans have oral herpes, but there is a reason you are not supposed to help with births if you have a break out. Contamination is an issue. One third of babies who contract herpes virus will be retarded, have developmental issues or die, and although it is fairly rare it should still be a consideration.

Those of us who don't have STD's need to be very careful about considering how STD's in our home and a greater chance of contraction could affect our other children. My husband has already made the decision that we will not introduce STD's into our family through any future marriages.

We all need to be humble and realize we don't know everything about this subject, research and pray!

It is wonderful to want to help take care of women who have been debased in this horrible way, but it is another thing to bring diseases home to your family without thinking it through.... of course if you already have these STD's it is much less of an issue and may put you in a perfect place to help and provide a family.
 
Seems to me that as a preventative measure it would be effective for some, but no more than having the ability, drive, and interest in a career. Both take more than a wish to be successful, and both can be entered into without preparation. Similarly, they may be harmed without preparation.

As for what a man should do... listen to our Creator and do as instructed. There is no one answer beyond that. We are not talking careers, family methodology, or statistics. We are talking souls. We are considering every course of action through the Spirit and Word. We are talking relationship.

I think our ability to focus is a blessing, but it should not negate our entire view. In all things, reflect the Father's heart. When we do that, our actions and words bear good fruit in all areas.
 
Back to the question on whether harlotry should be legal, prostitution was legalised in New Zealand several years ago for the reasons you state. At the time I opposed this along with most Christians, but have come to think it was actually correct. The main reason to keep prostitution illegal is because it is morally wrong - but the State has no business making a moral judgement. So on what authority does the State ban prostitution?

It is interesting to ponder prostitution in the Old Testament carefully. It is repeatedly spoken against in very harsh terms in scripture, and is certainly a bad idea morally. But in terms of the law, it was not actually forbidden outright - there were laws against temple prostitution, and laws against forcing your daughter to become a prostitute, but no actual punishment specified for a woman who ended up as a prostitute. Consider Solomon, when two prostitutes came to him with a dispute over a baby. He didn't arrest them for prostitution and have them punished - he ignored their prostitution entirely and just judged their dispute. The Hebrew law is actually incredibly merciful to such women. Why should secular law be harsher on a moral issue than God's law?

Polygyny is a potential prevention for prostitution, because no virgin decides "I want to be a prostitute". It is women who have been used and cast aside by men who become prostitutes. So if we can teach men that they actually need to be committed to the women they sleep with, and that even being already married is no excuse to abandon a woman, then fewer women will be used and cast aside, and fewer will end up in prostitution. In theory anyway.

For more reading, check out "Thelyphthora" on the books & links page. http://www.biblicalfamilies.org/links
 
Good post FH. I guess my take is that legalization would mean protections and resources for the women. Too many girls and women are forced into the life as slaves, and have no recourse because if they turn to the law they can be prosecuted.
 
It has been my expieranced through working with foster kids, and other who have worked with homeless people that if a woman decides to sell herself in american it isnt out of despiration but out of willful rebellion. This type of person wouldn't be safe to have around your home. I know. Of a people who took one into their family and live to regreat it geatly. A despirate homeless woman in america who doesnt want to sell herself, and would be safe around your family, will often find her way to relitives, a homeless shelter or to a church. I knew an couple in their fifties who did this as a ministry, the woman also found husbands for them too.

Other reasons i dont think someone wouldnt want to take harlots into their home is the STDs that you would expose your first wife too. Also i personally believe that the voluntary sexual union joins a woman to a man for life. Therefore a man can only marry a virgen or widow, otherwise he makes her to comit adultury.

Sex slaves would be a differnt story as they had no free will in what happened to them, but after they have been conditions and forced into servitute i think they would be so tramatized that they would need a lot of counseling before they would ever be ready for marriage if they would ever trust a man again. Also there are ministries that specialize in this area and provide profffesional couseling.

Its a natural desire in every man to want to rescue the damsel in distress and marry her. But. Whores are not damsels in distress and i doubt they would change even if you married them. Look at hosea who kept having to find his wife and buy ber back from other lovers.
 
My comment will be simple and brief.

Jesus once spoke about a person divorcing his wife causes/forces her to commit adultery (Let's not get into the detailed specifics of this, I'm only referencing the general idea). On the other hand, there are wives who would commit adultery because they want to, though their husbands have not divorced them, etc.

I don't think Plural marriage would be the cure-all for prostitution/adultery/whatever-other-evil-thing the hearts of people are inclined to do... BUT:
I do believe the justification of "these women have no other way to survive in this life" would be shot clean out of the waters.

The reality is, in fact, that due to unrighteous systems of men across the globe, people often get stuck in bad situations. Now that I'm on a roll, by the way, this thread is similar to what I was thinking when I started the "Polygamy for economic survival" thread.

Sure, there may be women out there who choose to be prostitutes through a drug habit, abuse issues, or whatever. However, for that young woman who is on desperately hard times and truly believes she has NO OTHER CHOICE but to sell her body... Plural Marriage should be another choice.

Also, I think this conversation could be expanded to include women occupied as strippers.
 
One says...

Samuel said:
It is women who have been used and cast aside by men who become prostitutes.
Click to expand...

Another says...

ServantoftheLord said:
if a woman decides to sell herself in american it isnt out of despiration but out of willful rebellion.
Click to expand...

You're both right. In my experience (9 1/2 years in law enforcement) I've encountered a lot more prostitutes who fit more closely with the second description than the first but both exist.


  • Should prostitution be legalized? In my opinion yes because the government should not try to legislate morality.
  • Is polygyny one possible solution to prostitution? In some cases, yes.
  • Is it a panacea, an automatic cure all? Absolutely not.
 
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