Please tell me what you think. This is a real family that I know personally.
Husband and wife and 3 kids go to church every Sunday and Wednesday, etc. Husband goes through a cycle every year where he falls off the wagon into alcohol, meth and hookers. Literally, no kidding. He stays at the local dump hotel with the prostitutes, and leaves the wife to fend for herself and the kids. He comes home once a week maybe for laundry, etc., and of course huge arguments happen at this time. He gets jailed repeatedly, and finally at his low point he repents, cleans up and she takes him back. This happens every year, the church puts him through discipline and then he is "restored". Finally after 5 years the church tells him that he is not welcome. The wife always takes him back.
This last time, he does every thing the same, except he skips the hookers and just has numerous affairs. Numerous meaning that the "other women" find out about each other and get pissed and fight it out at the local walmart much to the embarrassment of the wife who is told all about it. He is so wrapped up in the drugs, he does not remember talking to me in town, or why the cops are arresting him because he can't remember that he was grabbing at women in the store. The economy goes south, his construction business is bankrupt, and she moves out to his parents house to get away from him. He is still not clean or sober. He goes to the parents house, smacks his dad around in front of the kids, cops arrest him and now after many court room appearances, he is not allowed to see the kids or parents or the wife for a year. He is still not sober, still with one of the girlfriends, and still obviously away from God, and living out of state.
Their oldest boy is 13, just like mine and were good friends until we severed family get togethers because of how the husband acted. The other boy is 6 and the little girl is 2. The mom cannot finish her degree because she can get no financial aid because he did not do the taxes last year. Etc, Etc, Etc.
She is thinking about divorce, obviously. She says that she has forgiven him every time including this last time, but really does think that he is gone spiritually and does not want to end up dead at his hands. She is struggling with the thought that he might clean up and want to come back and should she give it one more try. ( everybody says not only no, but heck no).
Can she divorce him righteously in God's eyes?
Is she free to marry again?
Where is the line between forgivenes and forgiving but not taking him back?
Again, this is not a scenario, this is reality. We have given her a car because she was without one with 3 kids. No car and no way to get groceries, etc. We have helped out some with other stuff. She is a good friend. They were good friends.
Please pray for her and the kids and of course, the husband as well.
Thanks,
Paul
Husband and wife and 3 kids go to church every Sunday and Wednesday, etc. Husband goes through a cycle every year where he falls off the wagon into alcohol, meth and hookers. Literally, no kidding. He stays at the local dump hotel with the prostitutes, and leaves the wife to fend for herself and the kids. He comes home once a week maybe for laundry, etc., and of course huge arguments happen at this time. He gets jailed repeatedly, and finally at his low point he repents, cleans up and she takes him back. This happens every year, the church puts him through discipline and then he is "restored". Finally after 5 years the church tells him that he is not welcome. The wife always takes him back.
This last time, he does every thing the same, except he skips the hookers and just has numerous affairs. Numerous meaning that the "other women" find out about each other and get pissed and fight it out at the local walmart much to the embarrassment of the wife who is told all about it. He is so wrapped up in the drugs, he does not remember talking to me in town, or why the cops are arresting him because he can't remember that he was grabbing at women in the store. The economy goes south, his construction business is bankrupt, and she moves out to his parents house to get away from him. He is still not clean or sober. He goes to the parents house, smacks his dad around in front of the kids, cops arrest him and now after many court room appearances, he is not allowed to see the kids or parents or the wife for a year. He is still not sober, still with one of the girlfriends, and still obviously away from God, and living out of state.
Their oldest boy is 13, just like mine and were good friends until we severed family get togethers because of how the husband acted. The other boy is 6 and the little girl is 2. The mom cannot finish her degree because she can get no financial aid because he did not do the taxes last year. Etc, Etc, Etc.
She is thinking about divorce, obviously. She says that she has forgiven him every time including this last time, but really does think that he is gone spiritually and does not want to end up dead at his hands. She is struggling with the thought that he might clean up and want to come back and should she give it one more try. ( everybody says not only no, but heck no).
Can she divorce him righteously in God's eyes?
Is she free to marry again?
Where is the line between forgivenes and forgiving but not taking him back?
Again, this is not a scenario, this is reality. We have given her a car because she was without one with 3 kids. No car and no way to get groceries, etc. We have helped out some with other stuff. She is a good friend. They were good friends.
Please pray for her and the kids and of course, the husband as well.
Thanks,
Paul
) that she still has a living husband that she is bound to, so the masses, both inside and outside the church, would seem to be in more or less unanimous agreement that she can remarry whomever she pleases. Give her the facts, show her the passages, and then allow her to make her own choice. That's all we can do.