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What is the best advice you were ever given?

Husbands of more than one wife have to be better than the average. They have more experiance than monogamist so they have alot we can all learn from. So put the best advice you recieved for being a great husband here, and the things that make your marriage work.
 
Proper mental outlook. Marriage is a covenat for life. Between God and the couple. There is no way out or runnong from it as those who provide not for their own are worse than infidels. (like benladen) and i wouldnt want it any differnt as i love the security of the permence of marriage.)

Pray, pray pray, then fast and pray. I havent got anything or anywhere except through prayer.

The more dramitc she becomes the more quieter and non-emotional i need to be.

Wash the dishes, and when ever she is stressed take over watching kids or cooking or what ever she is doing so she knows i am there for her. Problem is i cant always be there for her as i have to be at work sometimes.

Really value and treasure her, a good wife is rare to comeby there might not be another one out there... she is worth what ever struggle or differnces you have to settle to work out issue with her for a happy marriage, And choose your battle, be consitsnt and dont change important standards but give into her request and emotional needs (like taking her to thrift stores while you watch the kids in the car so she can relax)
 
Don't dig up bones once a disagreement is settled it is done don't bring up who gave into to who there is no score keeper
Be settled before sleep no matter if it is all night long and calling off work the next day do not sleep or part until it is decided and you can truly say I sorry and I love you

Do not gripe about the under clothes in the bathroom if where your spouse lay something when done don't gripe about it or fuss. If it bothered them they wouldn't have left it there you will use more energy fussing about it and cause more damage than if you put the item where you want it to live

One parent corrections at a time. If the children have mis behaved do not side with the child in front of the children wait until you can excuse your selfs it is much easier to roll back punishment then mend a crack in the wall of parents- children be of one voice

Don't try to fix everything. Some times all that is néed or wanted is an understanding ear she doesn't always want your two cents most of the time she wants your two ears and both arms

Be the man of your house admit wrong or lack of knowledge always refer or defer to the word of GOD

Above all be kind and gentle in all you say or do

Coram deo
Jack P.
 
The best advice I was given was from my dad. This doesn't just apply to being a good husband, but father, son, wife, employee, employer . . . well, you get the point. He said, "Son, God gave you two eyes, two ears, and one mouth for a reason. It was a Devine plan to look and listen a lot more than you talk."
 
My Grandfather would always tell me to Always stay down wind. I use to believe he meant to mind my own buisness. It took me years to realize that he meant to Look at a situation from all angles before taking something head on.
 
The best advice I think I ever got was from a secular university professor. His basic message was that we should not be looking at marriage as two structures leaning on each other for support. If one structure depends on the other that much to remain standing, what happens when one structure is removed for some reason? Collapse.

Rather, we should look at marriage as two structures that can stand alone, but are placed deliberately next to each other for proximity and to create a more attractive overall structure. If one is removed, the other may not look as beautiful alone, but it remains intact.

Moral: we are still individuals responsible for our choices and our spiritual walk. Our spouses will inevitably disappoint us, and we will disappoint them, but we need to not allow that disappointment to destroy us as individual agents serving the Almighty.
 
I suppose it would have been a bit of more general advice that I received from my father on the topic of situational awareness which I believe everyone should be able to see as quite useful in life and marriage be it mono or plural. I don't recall his specific words but today it wold be to always check your six. Good advice all the way round. To my mind, while I will not claim to have achieved perfection in this respect, it is a good idea to be as aware as possible of any potential problems that are brewing so that they may be addressed immediately before they grow.
 
I don't have a "best"...there are so many great ones. The one that I most frequently have the choice to live several times each and every day is: "If you can't something nice about someone, don't say anything at all."
 
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