"If he cannot stand up to her, then he cannot stand up FOR her" Amen!
An intelligent Christian man will strive to be the kind of man who is easy to respect and reverence.
I'm training my young men to the standards I have for myself. They are working with me in the garden, with livestock, lifting weights (for me) bodyweight exercises and bands (for the boys and myself). They are expected to act like young men, not like boys. They get emotional and upset about things, and we practice that it is ok to feel those emotions, but that a man does not let his emotions control his head or his behavior. They (10, 8.5, 7) are daily practicing a recognition of and acceptance of their feelings, but to take command of those feelings and their minds and to put their heart into subjection to their will. To master themselves and own their actions. I'm so proud of them for bringing their weaknesses under subjection. When it's time to go weed the garden and they want to climb trees or go swimming, you can see on their faces that they REALLY don't want to go work. But they put on a good attitude like a pair of work boots and use a happy tone of voice and say "yes SIR" and we all go smiling to the garden to work.
A young man (since this video was mostly pointed at how a young man should act) should be practiced in the warfare of the mind and bringing it under subjection to his will. He will need the experience when his passions make him want to pursue a pretty pair of legs that have no substance or character attached to them. When he must work but would rather play. The world is FILLED with grown boys who have not learned this lesson and it's shameful.A Godly man should have the backbone to stand up to the world and obey God rather than man. To confidently say, "I won't bow to you or your Godlessness." He should have the guts to rule his household well. His children should "be in subjection to him with all gravity". 1Tim 3:4. He should be the kind of man that has the reputation of a man of character who's yes means yes, and his no means no.
My personal experience in dating before I found my wife was that being the "nice" guy was weakness and extremely unattractive. Being "romantic", or modeling yourself after the "romantic guy" characters of movies was a waste of time. What was attractive was behaving as if (or understanding the truth that) you have more important things to do rather than chase and worship a woman. I once accidentally captured the attention of the most beautiful woman on campus, simply by believing she was out of my league and not acting like I had a shot or trying to convince her to "like" me. Treated her as just another person. When she made herself available to talk later, being polite and then saying "gotta go, stuff to do, nice chatting" when most men would have been falling over themselves to get in her pants. It perplexed her and she HAD to figure out why I wasn't interested in her. So she kept finding excuses to insert herself into my orbit. We dated for a while but she ended up not being good marriage material. It really taught me a lot about what women actually want, which stands in start contrast against what most of them say they want.
I think Doug is almost spot on with everything he said. (I don't agree with everything he says in general but he's on point with patriarchy and proper authority in marriage)
Women say they want romance, chivalry, treated as equals, to be treated like queens, to have everything provided and to never need to work. And while some of those things are/seem good on the surface, they don't create happiness long term. A woman (heck, all people) need work to feel accomplished and like they matter. They want to be treated like they are treasured. Worship of a woman will inflate her ego but won't make her happy long term. Romance is fun but shouldn't be the focus and direction of a relationship. Few women are mature and wise enough to understand they will truly be fulfilled and happy by coming alongside a man who has a mission, assisting him in that mission. Being swept up into his glory and elevated with him into prominence. That a woman like that will be glorified, will be cherished as the amazing treasure she is. Her worth will truly be above rubies. If a young woman finds a man who isn't afraid to make her uncomfortable, to mold and shape her into a glorious bride, who will iron out the wrinkles with some pressure and the heat of adversity. Who will wash away spots with both his words, and scripture. Who will put her to good use, like a garment that is well worn is soft, comfortable, and looks nice as compared to a disused hoodie left crumpled in a corner with wrinkles almost permanently imbedded into it. She will find a man worth following through any trial or tribulation. That's the kind of man I'm trying to train my sons to be. FWIW
