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Big time backfire!

A

AmyC

New Member
My son just started kindergarten. His first full day was last thursday. It has been less than a week. He has been having problems from the get go. He can not, nor has he ever been able to, sit still. Even in his sleep he moves and rolls and fidgets. I believe he has ADHD and have been trying to set up a meeting with his school counselor since before school started.

I got a call today from the head teacher informing me that my son pushed another boy on the ground then sat on him. When asked why he did it, he said,

"The Devil told me to"

She told me she was conserned he is skitzafrenic. (I know this isnt how you spell it, but you know what i mean)

Sunday at church, the preacher talked about conscience. About how we all sometimes get the thought, "well no one will know if ..(do this bad thing)..." He said if you hear that voice, to run! that it is the devil talking to you. Dane and I talked more about this later in the day. I explained how the devil is God's enimy and is always trying to convince us to do things that God does not want us to do. That we must resist the temptation. I tried to tell the head teacher that. I dont think she believed me. We will be having a talk when he gets home. Please pray for us to have good communication this evening.

Thank you,
Amy
 
Will be keeping you in prayer.....God will give you the wisdom you need! His Word promises that if we ask for wisdom, he will gladly give it!

Blessings,

Doc
 
Remember that He has given you authority over every spirit that serves the Adversary within your house, and the power to 'tread on serpents and scorpions' and 'cast out demons' in His Name.

May He give you His strength,

Mark
 
When talking to a non-believer, especially a counselor, about things of a spiritual nature, you will likely be met with trouble, and labels like schizophrenia. This is not a good place to be, because now, if you refuse to medicate your child, you will possibly be labeled a bad parent.

My suggestion, based on personal experience, would be to take a look at his diet, and weed out things like preservatives, colors, additives, basically anything unnatural. And don't assume that "natural flavoring" is actually natural, that's generally a way for companies to get around having to report smaller amounts of dangerous chemicals.

If you want more information, look into the Feingold diet. The idea is that many of our children's behavioral issues stem from reactions to the chemicals in our overprocessed foods. By eliminating these chemicals that attack our bodies, we can eliminate a lot of reactions to those chemicals that tend to come out in our behavior. I experienced this personally as a child, and have seen the same thing in my own children. With my oldest, chocolate is his worst enemy, and will make him violent, unable to focus, incapable of sitting still, etc. By removing chocolate from his diet, he has gained some self-control. I believe he may have other triggers, but they are not as obvious as the chocolate was for my son.

If you want more information, feel free to ask. Most of our foods have massive amounts of chemicals, and sometimes it's hard to figure out what's good and bad. Food diaries are good for eliminating certain things for a few weeks and then reintroducing them to judge the behavioral changes. My only suggestion is that if you do make some changes, try to make them gradually, especially favorite foods. With my oldest, when we cut chocolate out of his diet, he was allowed to have a "chocolate day" where he could have a tiny piece of chocolate at the end of the day, once a week. After a while we went to two weeks, and eventually we just phased it out. We made sure that he understood that the chocolate had a very bad effect on him, and eventually he accepted it and is willing to go without chocolate, even if it's the only thing available. We still allow it as a treat now and then, but it's pretty rare now.

As for the "devil told me to" comment, is it possible he heard it somewhere and picked it up? Perhaps a cartoon, or a comment from someone you know? Kids pick up all sorts of things, and in my opinion that's a bit young to be dealing with instructions from the devil in a young child. I think explaining to him that he made the choice to do something naughty, and helping him to find other ways around those types of situations would be useful. If he can write, perhaps some appropriate copywork using bible verses from Proverbs (or whatever seems appropriate to the situation). It's harder at that age because understanding of things outside of themselves is still somewhat limited.

Like I said, I would start by looking at the foods your child eats. It's amazing what an effect that bad foods can have on a child. Their systems are still so fragile, and can't always handle the influx of toxins and chemicals that we can.
 
I agree with scaredwife, especially about diet making kids having adverse reactions. Today's episode may have just been an isolated incident, but the overall ADHD tendencies that you have described can be triggered by artificial preservatives and colorings.

Also, if you ever want to prayerfully consider homeschooling, there are a few of us here who you could talk to about it.
 
I knew I forgot something, homeschooling. :D

By homeschooling your child, you can counteract many of the issues that your child may run into by dealing with them directly and immediately. You can correct their behavior as soon as something goes wrong, and teach them right away how to behave correctly. It does still take time and repetition, but you are going to have much better, faster success if you are doing the correcting than if someone else they barely know is doing that correction (if they're lucky to even get direct, positive attention in the first place).

Homeschooling isn't as scary as it may seem, and it can be a lot cheaper than sending them to public school. The lists around here this year added up to around $400, I don't even think I've spent that much on all of my kids combined in the last 4 or 5 years total. And that was just for their school supplies. That doesn't even get into the $13,000 per year that we are taxed to pay for their so-called education.
 
When my nephew went to kindergarten for the first time he was a few days shy of being 5. Within a week the teachers were telling my sister (his mommy) that he wasn't ready for kindergarten. They wanted her to take him out of school for a year. She refused. The next thing that happened is they wanted him tested for ADHD, for what she says is "typical boy behavior." They wanted her to put him on medication so he wouldn't act like a little boy anymore. I am not sure if that is accurate, but the next year, she started home schooling him and she never looked back. She also homeschools my niece and they are doing very well. She takes a lot of care in her home schooling program and last year mixed things up a little by sending them to a special school one day a week. I think for them it has been a very successful enterprise and I believe in the concept whole heartedly.

SweetLissa
 
Amy,

There is some good advice here. Home schooling is certainly a better option in my opinion for some who are able to do it. It really is not as hard as people might think, nor as expensive, as has been pointed out. Some Christian bookstores stock the resources for doing it from the 'Christian' perspective, though one must be careful even there. However, it may be better than some of the purely secular curricula.

Though diet may be an issue and should be looked at, one should not discount the work of the enemy. If your son said what you say he said, it should be taken seriously and dealt with scripturally. Do not discount it or brush it off, as it could lead to more trouble down the road. Those who are not used to dealing directly with demonic spirits and do not exercise their Christ given authority over them suffer accordingly. James 4:7-8 says (NKJV)...

7Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. 8Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded.

If someone is not submitted to God and humbly obedient to Him, the devil can walk all over them. There are specific things that you must do to take a stand against the enemy in these situations. This is clearly a spiritual issue and will not be solved through natural means. Do not let this slide or downplay it. Cut it off from the outset, before it gets out of hand. There are far too many Christians who allow the enemy to work within their lives and the lives of their families and never gain victory over him. Remember this is not what Christ suffered and died for you to have. If you want help, I would be glad to tell you what you must do. You can send me a private message here or e-mail me directly at perfection777@live.com. I have prayed for you.

Be blessed,

Dr. Ray
 
First off while homeschooling is wonderful, and the best way for biblical upbringing, but One has to consider the fact that the parent and/or parents may not feel they should or want to homeschool. Not all are called to teach. Homeschooling is not a cure for all.

Amy,
There would have to be a lot going on for a competent person to suggest a young child has an issue as serious as Schizophrenia. - I know because my sister has 3 boys that had been dx'd with various mental health issues at very young age, all of whom are young adults now. The process of finding out what was wrong was not a "Ah Ha" he has blah blah blah but a long process of wrong guesses and hoping regimes &/or meds would work

My own daughter did various things around 4 to 6 yo that might make one think there were seriuos issues upstairs, all of which turned out to be a personality / behavioral issue that was correctable once the cause was found. - non medical in other words, just highly intelligent and sinful. :o

A lot can have to do with diet as suggested. - could be lack of sleep, unrestful sleep can be as bad as no sleep.
Does the school provide sugar packed snacks / drinks? Candy as a reward? Possibly there are mild allergies, food or environmental.
I have had this issue with the school my daughter goes to currently and after letting all know from the teacher to the principal that if they load her up durning the day and I come to pick up with her wired high on sugar - someone else is keeping her that night - they finally followed my requests. I will not deal with their mess. They thought I was a bit nuts until a few incidences at school - on days where something sugary was given early in the day; Then they found out that they don't want her on sugar either. Concentrated Sugars turn my lil girl into a very destructive child with no ability to consider consequences; extremely bad considering how highly intelligent she is. The school janitor quit after a few of her back to back bad days. No concentrated sugars and then she is smart, respectful, kind-hearted- all that parents could hope for; with high levels of sugars and I can understand how some parents snap.

A school once wanted to dx my brother as ADHD. A change in schools with a more active kindergarten allowed him the physical energy release he needed throughout the day before he could focus on anything. He wasn't ADHD, he was an athletic boy (at 27 he is still athletic, looks like a body builder by just exercising 3 hours a week... yeesh .. anyway) and smarter than his peers. His IQ test put him in the smart guy group. So he was too smart and too physically conditioned naturally for a standard kindergarten classroom.

A square peg in a round hole does not mean that there is something wrong with the square peg... it might be the hole.

While it might seem a bit odd, perhaps a before school exercise routine is needed to help his mind focus. A coworker put his 9 yo on a treadmill every morning starting a 530AM for a 2 mile run. Physically exhausted the kid, but it change him from failing to a good average student. That boy just recently graduated high school and is on a college scholarship for football.

There are so many possibilities that don't involve "oh there is something wrong with the child", it could be something in his surroundings that a small change(hopefully) will be what is needed. Most expierenced teachers will tell you (if they're honest) that the classroom setting is the worst way to teach a child... especially a boy - they tend to need more physical movement while in learning process.

As to the "devil made me do it"... My daughter "lost her mind" frequently and would cry when she left it at grandma's. When she did something wrong - it wasn't really her, it was her MIND. Her MIND made her do it. Call him out on situations when he is trying to push responsibility away from himself, even at a young age he needs to be "taught" accountability. It can take a while, took a couple years with my daughter.
 
As for the "devil made me do it" comment, children are parrots and they will repeat whatever it is you least want them to repeat. As a child I was "too honest" meaning I tattled on my parents and told people far too much for their tastes.

And yes, I agree that the teacher was probably guilty of diagnosing a child based on a book she had read. People are far to willing to put others into general categories in the name of trying to help.

I haven't really experienced much difference with diet, but I have heard from others that it makes a huge difference. I have never had children, but when taking care of other's children I found that adding caffeine was not a good idea. So if caffeine is a bad idea, then I bet some of those unpronouceable chemicals are even worse.

SweetLissa
 
One of my more intelligent children is apt to try to push off his behavior onto things like, "I wasn't hitting my brother with that bear, the bear was hitting him. Which is usually followed by a long discussion about how he was the one holding the bear in his hand, therefore he is the one responsible for beating his brother with it. He's highly intelligent and imaginative and creative, and his verbal skills are about 10 levels higher than they should be :) When he was 4, my mom had the kids for the weekend and was dosing out medication. When it was his turn, he said to them "Give me a double". Now, hubby and I don't really drink, and I don't think either of us have ever asked for a double of anything, so I have absolutely no idea where it came from. But he's constantly coming up with lines like that out of nowhere.

We've had to be far more strict with him about taking responsibility for his own actions, and with all our kids, we've tried to continually reinforce that they have to make choices not to steal or talk back, or beat a brother up. Eventually that sinks in and they get better about certain things.

Homeschooling isn't necessarily for everyone, but the younger you start, the easier it is to get into it.
 
Just an aside here, scaredwife:

Look up the word "deodan" sometime for that son! This same principle of inanimate objects being blamed for crime is the actual basis of what are called "civil forfeiture" cases now widely used for property confiscation of everything from cash to airplanes. (Sadly, it's also based on pagan animism, and crept into court during the Dark Ages.) Since the "property" has no God-given Right to 'face an accuser' or a 'Trial by Jury' of equally inanimate 'peers' - most Constitutional protections are short-circuited.

Perhaps he can be shown why a system of Law based on God's Word brings an entirely different perspective!
 
We're getting there :) He's stopped doing that for the most part, and for now, gets in more trouble when he tries to use that "logic" to get out of trouble. For the most part, he's fairly truthful, and I think some of it has to do with his level of understanding and the concept of what he's holding is very much in his own control, as opposed to a separate object. He's a very literal child, so I can see easily how he might not associate the object in his hand to be under his control. You'd have to know him to understand his quirks, and he has plenty :)
 
You'd have to know him to understand his quirks, and he has plenty :)
Click to expand...

That's why God gave him parents, scaredwife, and put His Word in Writing so we could all read it for ourselves! ;)

Blessings,
Mark
 
Update on School -

My son has gotten approved for an IEP, where they will stop punishing him for not being able to sit still by taking away recess, :D . The "real" IEP will be on the 15th. Thank you for all who prayed for us in this situation. Thank you also for all the advice and help offered. The school seems to be willing to work with us to help him get the best public education he can. Woo Hoo!

Homeschooling is currently not an option, though if you know of any good resources on that topic they would be appricated. Is there already a Homeschooling thread? If not there should be...

Amy
 
That's great, Amy! I'm so happy for you that you are relieved by this. Please, tell him that our family says hello.
 
Maybe the Devil did tempt him to do it? If you look at the consept of being a Christian it's nutz. Jessus has delusions of grandure and what about his followers not to mention Paul. I mean that man gets words from god and has a thorn in his side..... SKITZO. Homeschool is the answer I have. My boys have never said that the devil made them do it but I've been much avoiding the topic of "Satan" and "Demons vs Angles" I answer what ever questions they ask and we go with that. So far the boys no the word Sin but we don't use it much. I've read them stories from the bible so they have some dark imagry. I try and directly pray at that momment that it wouldn't come up at the wrong time. Like a visit with there dad. Because he's going to think that I'm teaching them violent things. I'm not suggestion that you need to tailer your suns education, I'm suggesting you say a prayer everytime something comes up that raises a red flag. I'll pray for you. Can you get him into a christian school? Not that would be better but sometimes it is.
 
I don't make my boys sit still in class as long as it's not disruptive. I tend not to want to jump to a clasification because there attentionspand and consentration are great. There is much more to ADHD than sitting still. Boys are full of beans as they should be.
 
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