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mattmorgan77

New Member
Over the last year, I have tried to come to grips with the one man / one woman marriage model versus what I am understanding to be the more biblical understanding of one man / one or more women model. As a man who has been happily married for eight and a half years, I am perfectly content to let the status quo be if that is God's calling for my life. My wife, at this time, is not really open to conversation as to the biblical (versus "Christian") understanding of plural marriage, so I seem to be in somewhat of a holding pattern for the time being.

I come from a Southern Baptist heritage, and that brings with it a desire to really understand the scriptures for myself. I, like others here, got a little hung up on the Exodus 21 passage, combined with God (through Nathan) telling David that He had given him Saul's wives (plural). If my God is the same yesterday, today, and forever; why is plural marriage the anathema of the church? Is God wrong for giving David his wives? Who can I express this seeming disparity with among my peers? What would my pastor try to tell me? So, for this last year, it has been somewhat of a lone contemplation. Thank you for this community where one can freely express these thoughts and ponderings.
 
Hi Matt and Welcome!
You are in good company, and the knowledge base on this site is only comparable to the love shared. I have personally spent days reading others stories, and like you said it was most comforting to know there's a community to talk to and share with.
I hope in due time you find what you are looking for.
If you need something just ask.
 
This is also a place where there is help for your wife when the conversation does come up. We are here to support each other and the ladies on this board are a wealth of information, compassion and understanding.

SweetLissa
 
Welcome to the journey. This journey has many rocks, cliffs, narrow trails, as well as lions, tigers and bears, oh my! However, yet, here we stand, by God's grace!
 
Matt,

Mark suggests that this study will be interesting for you. I agree. However, for me studying biblical marriage has been much more than interesting. Though I have not pursued the practice, it has absolutely been life transforming.

Several powerful questions come out of a study such a this, such as: "Why would God allow men to have more than one wife?", "What does this say about Him?", and "What does this say about our natures as human beings and our roles in marriage?" As I approach the answers to these and other questions in light of scriptures which reveal God's heart of ultimate compassion toward all humanity, I find myself changing into a more loving, compassionate, and caring man. I see much more vividly that: 1) Christians must orient our lives to provide for the needs of others, 2) godly people should build families which will nurture the physical and spiritual needs of every member with the focus of developing a righteous character in their children, and 3) that women are not simply objects to be pursued, prizes to be won, or hinderances along the way, but real human beings who have real hearts (some good, some bad). The study has also unlocked more of the Bible to me, since so much of it can not be properly interpreted without an understanding of the strong family-based culture in which much of the Bible was written.

I'm confident in saying that the study of God's word on this topic has freed me to become a better husband to my wife, a better father to my children, a better minister to those outside of my immediate family, and a better man in general. I hope you will find the same joy in your family.

Joe
 
Matt,

Welcome to the forums. Whether or not you and your family choose to pursue plural marriage is not nearly as important as to your search for truth. I was in your position not too many years ago, where the very foundations of my faith were shaken because of the revelation of truth regarding this issue. And although the truth at times can be disruptive, and even traumatic, it does eventually have a certain cleansing quality for the soul.

Much happier now, thank you very much!

Blessings,
 
Welcome! I'm fairly new here too. I used to be one of those wives who used to argue with my hubby over polygamy in the Bible (I had the typical arguments..."God never ordained it" etc.) and wouldn't even entertain the possibility of plural marriage for myself...yet here I am. I am not wild about it, but I have seen the error in my thinking and the LORD is helping me through it. My point: it might not be God's will for your family, but if it is, you might be surprised at how your wife can come around or her heart can be turned. :)
 
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