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Is this right

  • Thread starter Thread starter James A
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James A

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I recently have been looking into the Bible a lot and have come to a thought that I feel has not been touched on in detail. So here goes. Lets say a man marrys his first wife. They therefore become one person. Holding that thought in your mind the one flesh then should not both the man and the wive vet potential the next wife. Say the hushband finds a potential 2nd wife. Should the wife not sit down and talk with her to see if she has the gaulities that would benefit and enhance the marraige of the first wife and hushband. I think in the instance Of the first wife if she is out shopping and makes a new friend and she is a perfect fit to add to the marraige they start preparing her mentally and emotionally to the possiblity of marraige. Or do you think the man should do everything and the ladie sit idol once again I am asking for advice not to be disected in my words that the thread does not leave any fruit for us to learn
 
Do you think also the past experiences of the lady is a bump you have to possiblie overcome
 
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I think the first wife should definitely be involved. In fact I wouldn't step into this if the first wife had the least bit of hesitation. Trying to rail road something like this down the throat of a first wife sounds foolish to me. That's my thoughts on it. I would rather my wife do most of the "dating" too . If your first wife gets along swimmingly with your second wife and their best friends, well i'd say you've won the lottery and you have this thing whipped..... And you may only have to invest in one king size bed.;)
 
So your saying the second wife is easier for the man because the firsts wife uses her emotional and mental experience/maturity. I would love to get some responses from ladies who have parents that have multiple wifes or wives that are in a multiple wife marraige
 
that's how I best see doing it with zero experience. I plan on taking it extremely extremely slow. A second wife I'm sure could be one of the best things but if done right but done wrong or too hasty could destroy an otherwise happy mariage. That is a lot to shoulder so I think I would be using every feeler i had on how the relationship is forming. And your first wife is definitely the best you have.
 
I love my wives, but I will let the Creator of the universe lead me.
 
You're conflating two very different issues here by assuming a particularly extreme interpretation of one phrase in the text - "one flesh", namely your statement that they become "one person" - and then running off down the implications of that without stopping to question whether your interpretation of that phrase was correct to begin with.

The term "one flesh" does not mean they become one person, one spirit. If it did, then patriarchy would not exist. It is most simply understood as meaning "they have sex, come together physically". There's a whole host of further discussion we could have on that, it may mean more, search the archives. But does not mean that the man's headship, free will, or unique individuality disappears. Nor the woman's individuality for that matter. They're not one person mentally - but they are united physically.

Having said that, involving number 1 in a courtship is wise, for a whole host of reasons. But that's a separate issue and comes back to logic and wisdom, not scriptural principles of oneness.
 
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