Just got back from Ruth's. She has to get ready for work, and the children are going to another sitter's house for the night. We talked and talked and talked, about what is happening lately. Although she agreed that this has been happening shockingly fast, she also believes that perhaps she and Mr. Froggie needed that little push from me (and she also said I am pushy! :shock: ), so they could finally see what I see. And now they do. Yesterday and today they have finally seen what I see. They still think I'm bonkers, but that is why they love me. :lol:
This morning we all had to drop into our workplace to pick up our Christmas turkeys. But we have nowhere to put FOUR frozen whole turkeys! (Our 18 year old son also works at the same place we do). But another team mate/friend has FOUR freezers, and said we could store our turkeys at her place. (yes, this story is relevant) So anyway, I had to go to work, so Ruth and Mr. Froggie took dear son home, then drove up to our friend's house with the turkeys, just the two of them. Ruth told me this evening that today in the car, the whole situation finally dawned on her with the realization that this is really for real, and not some crazy, flakey idea that I was going to back out on.... she said she realized at that point that she is also every bit as commited, and there is no turning back; we are really going to go through with this, it is not temporary, but life long, even after the kids are all grown.
Ruth went on to explain that she has never had a relationship like this before-- not talking about a poly relationship, but a relationship born out of sincere love and friendship. This is a totally new experience for her, and she had no idea that there are people who have this kind of love and closeness in their marriages. (My heart breaks for her) I keep telling her that I know this, and that is why I'm doing this: because she deserves nothing less than what I have--- I want her to have everything that I have-- I want her kids to have everything that my kids have had. These statements make her head spin, and she cannot fathom it. It is the closest thing I can finally compare to what Christ has done for me. And Christ did it, so I could have everything He has!
So last night she came over and told me she had had a talk with her children. She sat them all down and explained that She and Mr. Froggie and I have made a solemn promise to be their parents-- TOGETHER--- they now have two moms, and one dad. They are welcome to call us "Mom and Dad" if they like, or they can call us by our first names; it is up to them. Oh my word, are they excited!!!
They started calling us "Mom and Dad" immediately. Ruth explained to them that if anything were to happen to her, that Mr. Froggie and I will raise them and love them and take care of them, and that is our promise we all made together. We showed them the rings we got to remind us of that promise. We are not telling them anything about the term "plural marriage," since they will not understand it. But we have simply explained that we are now one family, and will be doing a lot more things together as a family, such as taking a vacation together and going camping this summer. It all went VERY well. We are just blown away at how well it went! Even my own younger son (the one that just turned 16) immediately started calling Ruth "New Mom," and gave her a hug and kiss before going home to his own bed last night, and before going back to school after lunch this afternoon. :shock: Our older son is not quite so comfortable with the idea, but he has very maturely understood that he really has no choice in it, as it is already happening, so therefore he has made the decision to "be okay" with it.
The teenage daughter is somewhere in between the two teen boys: She loves all of us, and wants us all to be happy, and is happy for her mother, but she does not understand how this kind of relationship would even work, and how I would be willing to do something like this. Ruth explained to her that her "picker" is broken, and has probably never worked-- every relationship she has ever been in has been a bad one-- but she didn't pick this time;
we picked her! She also stated that she was attracted to Mr. Froggie at first sight, but that when she saw his wedding ring, she was disappointed, because here was a good man, and he was unavailable.
She explained that when it came to choosing a partner, she never considered Mr. Froggie, because she did not realize he was an option. Truth is, until recently, he was NOT an option! :lol: She explained to her teen daughter that this is really happening, that there is no turning back; this is for real. Teen daughter doesn't understand, but she will be okay with it. She is having a doubly hard time because she is having some drama with her boyfriend that I won't go into at this time.
So anyway.... although things have been happening rather fast, Ruth says she believes she needed it to, and thanks me for that little push. :lol: However, they are going to try to take things just a wee bit more slowly now, since she really wants to plan a special weekend/honeymoon/getaway to "seal" her relationship with Mr. Froggie, and she really thinks it should be AFTER Christmas. However... I have to say, things are really heating up between them, and I am not so sure they can wait that long! :lol: I told her that if it turns out they can't wait, then this is what I want: 1) I want it to be "on purpose," and not because they got caught up in the heat of the moment. 2) That day is their official anniversary date 3) We have to have cake and celebrate, and all they have to say is, "we're having cake!" :shock: Of course, the ideal is to plan a special date and getaway, but life doesn't always go according to the ideals we have in our heads, and I'm okay with that--- I just want it to be a very special and sacred event for them. :lol:
As for Mr. Froggie: I have not yet seen him since we parted ways at work this morning. He is still sleeping, as he works the night shift. But I do want to hear his feelings on all this, and make sure he is okay with how fast things are moving.
As for your question, Diener, about what changed his mind: Well, I have kind of an idea, but I think I will ask him, to be sure before I answer that. Then I will most certainly get back to you.
Oh, and PS: We are also VERY excited about Christmas this year. We are all going to spend it together, and sharing new traditions from each household, and also coming up with some new ones, unique to our new family. This is going to be the best Christmas ever, because this year, Ruth's children are
getting a new daddy for Christmas! (And I get five new children!) :mrgreen:
You are a wonderful master and I am so very happy to be your servant, Beloved!