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The term 'wife'

DeathIsNotTheEnd

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Alright so, this is something that recently has come to my mind.

I've seen a number of comments and some threads have gotten derailed into this topic, but I'd like a 'one-thread catch-all' spot to discuss it :)


What does everyone think of the term 'wife'?

On the one hand, the Bible doesn't use that term. It just says 'woman'. "Joe's woman", etc. On the other hand, most cultures have words specifically to denote a woman who is pledged/bound to a specific man, and other words to denote (or that at least have the nuance) of an unattached woman. 'Single', for instance. In Japanese there are a couple words, for example. The most common one means more like 'dearest', and is genderless. The 'older' one that the dictionary will teach you literally means 'innermost woman', like, 'the woman who takes care of the innermost room of your house'. Some people argue it's 'innermost in your heart'. Then there are other various terms like 'bride', which is 'girl who has a wedding', and 'female member of a couple'. So, different words with different nuances, but none have a literal meaning of 'woman who is bound to a man'.
(Side note: in Japanese myth, the first sin was when the man and woman met and the woman spoke first! Then God made them do it again until the man spoke first, and then it was ok. lol)


In our modern world the term 'wife' has the specific meaning, but it also carries a lot of cultural baggage.

Personally, until today, I always felt the term was really important. Important for me to refer to my women as my wife.
But, today I realized that perhaps God doesn't care for/about that particular word so much. ?

And then I'm left with how to talk about them to other people. Hmm.
 
From a theological perspective wife complicates things because it is associated with a subset of relationships that is narrower than what the Bible refers to when using wife (or rather the translation thereof).
 
From a theological perspective wife complicates things because it is associated with a subset of relationships that is narrower than what the Bible refers to when using wife (or rather the translation thereof).
Right. I mean the Bible just says woman. Abraham's woman. Joseph's woman. A woman was a father's, a husband's, or God's (widows). Even old pagan cultures got it with Norse names like eriksdotter, for instance. But then you introduce
Rome and the catholic church oligarchy and, well...disintegration of tribes and all that. Somewhere along the line women were no longer men's helpmeets but 'just other people', and you could only have one, and it had to be state approved, and etc etc
 
Right. I mean the Bible just says woman. Abraham's woman. Joseph's woman. A woman was a father's, a husband's, or God's (widows). Even old pagan cultures got it with Norse names like eriksdotter, for instance.
That’s the crux of the matter.
Ownership.

To a society that doesn’t believe in the idea that every female belongs to some specific male, can a different word than wife work?
 
Because of differences in the understanding people have in the meanings of a word, it will be necessary at times to use a variety of different words to get the message across. This is particularly the case with how people understand many of the theological terms we use and even normal day to day words. Taking the time to explain what you mean by the words you use can be a wonderful opening to teach the deeper truths of scripture. Perhaps we could consider these differences regarding words like 'wife' and 'wives' an opportunity to use to our advantage rather than an obstacle to get past(?)
 
I like that idea.

So in such a hypothetical conversation...

How would one succinctly go about introducing one's wife in a short, clear way that got the real meaning across?
Hmmmmmmm. I shall have to ponder this.
 
I think y'all may be overthinking this. In almost all social situations where you're meeting new people you can just introduce someone by their name. If someone asks, "so is this your wife?" or "and how are y'all related?" or "how do y'all know each other", then you can make a decision at that time re which way to run with your answer. Some people will get a version of "that's on a need to know basis and you don't need to know", and some people will be people you're comfortable going into more detail with, which is going to take about a paragraph of information anyway—there is no one word that describes the status of additional women in a legally-enforced-monogamy-only culture in a way that doesn't require unpacking with additional explanation, so no matter how you develop that explanation, you're probably going to go through two or three words to complete it (it's sorta like this, and sorta like that...).

If you're not sure which way to go, or if you want to smoke out whether the person is legitimately interested or just being nosy, my favorite term is "partner" because of its helpfully ambiguous connection to both business partner and domestic partner. If offered without further explanation, it generally signals (to the socially aware) that you're answering the question without really answering it. So then they either move on ("that's nice") or they press in, in which case you can either give them the full 411 or you can just change the subject (which signals even to the socially dense that you're not going to talk about it with them).

So instead of looking for a one-word solution (it ain't happening), think about how you're going to tell your story to those you want to tell it to, and how you're going to avoid telling your story to those you don't want to tell. That's a solvable problem.
 
I know who I am to my husband- who cares what others think. Partner, wife, woman, co wife, hey you. God has different names. It seems to just depend on the timing, people he’s dealing with and such. You poor men- it’s just men or husband (except for @Verifyveritas76 he's special- I call him Mr. Incredible).
 
If the Lord would have wanted us to have a specific term he would have given us one. In the Philippines where I live they have sitcoms referring to the "legal wife." Ako Legal Wife (I'm the legal wife) is part of a series of comedy dramas here in which secret or winked at polygamy is the center of the plot. It's apparent to more than us that wife has become a four letter word.
 
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