I am not getting your point
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“Mark’s” concubine?
- Thread starter steve
- Start date
The reason they are asking for his name... Islamic culture is rather harsh on single women... they will need the covering that the man can provide...
I don't think it's just Islamic culture, that just one of the last holdouts of a traditional outlook. Look at the covering of 1 Cor 11: it literally demonstrated their being under authority. In ancient Mesopotamia such a covering demonstrated they were a wife as opposed to a slave or harlot.
I don't really see this independence in scriptures; esp. since the whole point is her being his women, that denotes a level of authority involved.
Although I can see the benefit you're talking of, esp. in situations with older women past childbearing who've been alone for a long time. Going to be a lot of those in the coming years.
Christians like to make the husband provider and idle wife at home the gold standard of marriage. Yet look at the Proverbs 31 woman, she made money, a lot of it, and worked extremely hard.
The thing about plural marriage is that while an alone woman would have to work full time to support herself, a woman in a plural marriage needn't work as hard, even if they are providing their own food and clothing. Several women with small businesses or working part time will add up to a lot of income quickly.
My wife has long been a full time homemaker, but idle is something she has never been.
1. Homemaking is a big job! It is an important job! It is almost a lost art. Creating a refuge for rest and respite is a huge win for quality of life.
So many women are stressed out these days, because they have taken on so many of what was traditionally men's roles, but they never really lost the old roles and so they are trying to do everything and really it is too much.
2. Children are obviously important for the future. Having a full time parent is super helpful in my mind. Sure you can have great kids with no full time parent, but I think that is doing it the hard way.
3. Labor surplus. In the old days there was a huge labor surplus with women at home. With women all at work this is all gone. This really helps with taking care of others besides children.
For example, when my in-laws moved in with us on their last days the doctor said mom would only last for a few weeks. She lasted for almost a year. My wife's sisters could only stay so long before they had to get back to jobs. My wife was able to give them full time care without any major change to our income or life.
4. Home based businesses (Proverbs 31 woman).
5. Charity and Ministry - If none of the above there is always charity and ministry at church and in the community. This helps improve the reputation of the family and increase the family influence which can be used for much good.
None of the above is meant to be a put down for families who are organized differently, but a lot that can be said for doing it the old fashioned way if you can in my opinion.
Oh I agree and we have sacrificed much for my wife to be a homemaker. But most Christian homemakers we've observed are not very industrious with their time. They accomplish far less than their great-grandmothers despite the job being far easier due to modern technological conveniences.
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@rockfox, I’ve only done some quick calculations, but it seems like when a wife works, and you do the calculations, does a family come out ahead? She would need a car, car insurance, clothing, lunches, gas, full time baby sitter/daycare, and the lust goes on. The quick figures I’ve come up with, I don’t see the family coming out ahead. Then you add in your child is being raised by someone else. Your wife being a homemaker is fantastic.
This is true, however, it takes a lot of discipline to live in a two income culture on one income. There has to be a steadfast unmoveable goal. For us it was all about the children. We homeschool, but it is only partially to keep them from the unsavory elements. It is primarily so that we can ensure that they have access to the best curriculums available to us.
My situation was more complex. And not everyones situation is the same.
Often yes, it is a net loss. However different peoples cost basis' are different. It is worse if you have to pay for daycare but if you have friends/family/church members who will watch for free/cheap the numbers can change. And it's easier if you only have 1 or 2. Try getting daycare for 5 or 10 or 15! And then once they get to an age to be able to go to public school, you just need them to be watched for a couple hours, if that. Then only the summer becomes an issue. And women who choose to stay home will receive push back from society for 'wasting their lives'.
So people can and do come out ahead. The bigger issue is that their lifestyle (nothing fancy, just the default American one) requires two incomes. In order to get by on one income can take a lot of sacrifice and a lot of work on the wife's part. A generation or two ago that 1 income would have easily supported a family at a middle to upper class level. But between immigration and the mass movement of women into the workplace, real wages are extremely depressed at the same time several essential costs have ballooned and most middle class folk struggle to get by, whether 1 income or 2.
So let me give an attempt to bring this back around to on-topic. How could concubinage apply in this situation? Or multiple women working?
Well, if a husband and 2 wives/concubines each had jobs or home based businesses that required half time work and produced half time income; you end up with 1.5 incomes. That might be enough to make the difference (1 income too small, but with some sacrifice 1.5 could work while giving more time at home compared to 2 full time incomes). And that would be from 3+ sources so if any one source dries up, you're not in a bad way as compared to everyone depending on just the man's job. And that 1.5 incomes would come from 1.5 efforts and leave 1.5 at home efforts; which is more attention for the kids than just a single stay at home mom. Each parent would get some time at home with the kids; including the father who, when working full time just doesn't have as much influence in his kids lives as he should.
What about time-limited concubinage? I don't know how to apply that to this other than to say, it could make a good stepping stone to get into a full wife situation and make polygamy more likely to happen. But I don't know.
Often yes, it is a net loss. However different peoples cost basis' are different. It is worse if you have to pay for daycare but if you have friends/family/church members who will watch for free/cheap the numbers can change. And it's easier if you only have 1 or 2. Try getting daycare for 5 or 10 or 15! And then once they get to an age to be able to go to public school, you just need them to be watched for a couple hours, if that. Then only the summer becomes an issue. And women who choose to stay home will receive push back from society for 'wasting their lives'.
So people can and do come out ahead. The bigger issue is that their lifestyle (nothing fancy, just the default American one) requires two incomes. In order to get by on one income can take a lot of sacrifice and a lot of work on the wife's part. A generation or two ago that 1 income would have easily supported a family at a middle to upper class level. But between immigration and the mass movement of women into the workplace, real wages are extremely depressed at the same time several essential costs have ballooned and most middle class folk struggle to get by, whether 1 income or 2.
So let me give an attempt to bring this back around to on-topic. How could concubinage apply in this situation? Or multiple women working?
Well, if a husband and 2 wives/concubines each had jobs or home based businesses that required half time work and produced half time income; you end up with 1.5 incomes. That might be enough to make the difference (1 income too small, but with some sacrifice 1.5 could work while giving more time at home compared to 2 full time incomes). And that would be from 3+ sources so if any one source dries up, you're not in a bad way as compared to everyone depending on just the man's job. And that 1.5 incomes would come from 1.5 efforts and leave 1.5 at home efforts; which is more attention for the kids than just a single stay at home mom. Each parent would get some time at home with the kids; including the father who, when working full time just doesn't have as much influence in his kids lives as he should.
What about time-limited concubinage? I don't know how to apply that to this other than to say, it could make a good stepping stone to get into a full wife situation and make polygamy more likely to happen. But I don't know.