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Courtship?

Obedient Christian girl

Obedient Christian girl

Member
Female
I've always respected men's God given right to lead, however, sometimes they need a little help seeing what in front of them.
If a girl wants to be courted by a specific man, is there a way for her to express her interest or is her best option fluttering her eyelashes extra hard when hes around?
And on men's side, how should they approach courting a girl, should they contact her father first? Is it alright if he speaks to her directly? What lines shouldn't he cross?
If he already has a wife, should the wife make first contact?
 
Obedient Christian girl said:
If a girl wants to be courted by a specific man, is there a way for her to express her interest
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Just like in junior high, get somebody to be an intermediary.

“What do you think at that Obedient girl?”
And yes, polygyny gives a girl more choices and more opportunities to be proactive.
 
Obedient Christian girl said:
And on men's side, how should they approach courting a girl, should they contact her father first? Is it alright if he speaks to her directly?
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It would depend on the circumstances, very few females consider themselves under their fathers headship anymore.
 
Obedient Christian girl said:
If he already has a wife, should the wife make first contact?
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As a rule, no. By that I mean that there should be no rule requiring it in the marriage. In my opinion.
But a friendship naturally occurring between the two of them prior to his involvement could be a blessing to all.
 
Obedient Christian girl said:
But can she be proactive? Can she make the first move, men aren't exactly experts when it comes to womens cues
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Yes, men can be rather oblivious to women, so it's best to just state what you're interested in bluntly, so he gets the point and can then decide how and whether to proceed. That's the point at which he'd approach your father, if that was appropriate in the circumstances.

Ruth made the first move - she offered to be Boaz's wife.
Then, having accepted the idea in theory, Boaz proceeded to obtain permission from relevant family members. As Ruth was a widow and a long way from home he did not need to consult with her father, in the circumstances he had other enquiries to make instead. But that would be the time to ask a father's permission.
No sense asking a father's permission if you don't even know if the woman's interested in you.
 
FollowingHim said:
The way to a man's heart is through his stomach. Just give him some of that canned food you're working on.
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A woman that knows how to store food and can prep away for the tough times is a gem! Rare and holds great value!
 
Obedient Christian girl said:
An older man is ideal though, wouldn't he be opposed to all of thay junior high drama?
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Logically ascertaining the potential level of interest would seem more pragmatic than dramatic.
 
It could be done in a dramatic way of course, if you asked a dramatic schoolgirl to be the intermediary. Which was no doubt the fundamental problem in whatever situation you are recalling as a "junior high drama".
 
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