I've been doing alot of reflecting and praying. It was just revealed to me that I have been selfish. Jessica can no longer have children. We looked at adoption and it didn't seemed feasible. Because of this we got involved in a few children's ministries and orphanages. The fact that she can't give me children doesnt change my love for her but it did put blinders on me when it came to plural marriage. I made a list of things that I needed in a second wife. One of the most important to me was that she wanted kids. This caused me to dismiss a few women ,who had a servants heart, who would have made good wives and wanted to be wives, because they couldn't have kids. I didn't stop to think of how much good it would do for them. They wanted kids but could have any (give me more). We have children, we could have shared with them. They would have got to share the love for a child that is in them and my children would have been blessed with more love. I told myself it was what I needed but in truth it was my own selfish desire to get what I wanted. I guess I made this thread in the hopes that everyone will look at their reasoning behind wanting a plural marriage. We talk about single moms and who's eligible and not, but we don't seem to talk about how we can use plural marriage to glorify G-d much beyond headship. There are a few families here on the forum I think got it right. It's not only about enlarging their family, making things more financialy sound, or filling roles in the family. Which are all good reasons. Its about opening our families up to those who need something from our family. It's about finding a way as a family to serve the Kingdom, to glorify G-d through good works and ministry as a family. Thats my thoughts and opinion anyway.