Poly and disunity, disharmony, division & disobedience

[elkanahtyler]

Well Tejero accepted Pastor Whitten's challenge and tried to teach his ladies about Biblical "wife submission". Excuse my sarcasm, but how could he be so blessed?!?!?!?!?!? One of his ladies told him that all those Scriptures about wives submitting themselves to their husbands are not for today because today's woman is so much better educated and sophisticated. Sometimes I am tempted to think she is a reincarnation of Job's wife. She agrees that she is Tejero's wife in health, wealth, for better but not for worse. Tejero's second lady, formerly a deaconess, told him that he is incorrectly teaching the Word, that she knows the Word better than him, so she doesn't have to submit to him. His third lady has come to believe that polygyny was for then and not for now, and demoted him to best friend status. His other two were not good to her. And the crowning joy is that he appears to be maritally bound to them as long as they want to be his ladies (1 Cor 7:11,12,15), as long as they both live (1 Cor 7:10,11,39). Showers of blessings. The miracle is that Tejero still Loves them.
***Matthew 10:35 For I have come to part asunder a man from his father, and a daughter from her mother, and a [a]newly married wife from her mother-in-law-- 36 And a man's foes will be they of his own household. 37 He who loves [and takes more pleasure in] father or mother more than [in] Me is not worthy of Me; and he who loves [and takes more pleasure in] son or daughter more than [in] Me is not worthy of Me;

He can't do Matthew 18:16,17 with them since their pastors have no respect for him and do not accept their relationship. They would not accept a BF delegation. It's in the Lord's hands. At least the one who has chosen "best friend" status with him has told him that when he needs help with daily living activities, she will be available to help him if he can pay her. Wife #1 told him that he is on his own if he needs assistance if his health fails. Wife #2 told him she is available only as a last resort - she is very small, frail and has fragile bones. It is surely wonderful to be so well loved.
***1 Peter 1: 6 [You should] be exceedingly glad on this account, though now for a little while you may be distressed by trials and suffer temptations, 7 So that [the genuineness] of your faith may be tested, [your faith] which is infinitely more precious than the perishable gold which is tested and purified by fire. [This proving of your faith is intended] to redound to [your] praise and glory and honor when Jesus Christ (the Messiah, the Anointed One) is revealed.

 

[Anonymous]

Well Tejero accepted Pastor Whitten's challenge and tried to teach his ladies about Biblical "wife submission". Excuse my sarcasm, but how could he be so blessed?!?!?!?!?!?

Perhaps Tejero should investigate the Biblical role of husbands as patriarchs, as heads of his wives and not allow them to set the rules. Just thinking out loud.

 

[elkanahtyler]

"not allow them to set the rules"? Tejero sets the rules for their relationships, and they choose to ignore a lot of what he asks of them.
It's a sin to make them submit. We have not Scripture to make them "obey or submit". All one can do is teach and pray.

 

[elkanahtyler]

"24 A servant of the Lord must not argue. Instead, he must be kind to everyone, teachable, willing to suffer wrong, 25 and gentle in refuting his opponents. After all, perhaps God will allow them to repent and to come to a full knowledge of the Truth, 26 so that they might escape from the devil’s snare, even though they have been held captive by him to do his will." 2 Tim 2 ISV
"1 Brothers, if a person is caught doing something wrong, those of you who are spiritual should restore that person in a spirit of gentleness. Watch out for yourself so that you are not tempted as well." Gal 6 ISV
"15 “If your brother sins against you, go and [kindly, gently, humbly] confront him while the two of you are alone. If he listens to you, you have won back your brother. Mat 18

 

[Anonymous]

Mr. Tyler,
I agree that we must not try to force a wife to submit or obey. We as husbands must stand by the Biblical standards, unyielding, and do right. Have you read my article "Marital Bondage is Wrong"? I think it is in the teachings section. I am interested in what you think of it.

 

[Anonymous]

One is left to wonder how Tejero found himself married to such disobedient & rebellious women ? It seems all of them have rejected the Biblical hierarchy set down for families in the N.T. Wifely responsibilities & expectations would be something to discuss and agree upon prior to the marriages. It doesn't sound like Tejero showed sufficient wisdom during the courtship phase. I agree with Pastor Whitten, Tejero needs to become the patriarch of his family even if it ruffles some of the ladies' feathers. God intended for husbands to lead their wives. Tejero is currently living in a matriarchal family, where his wives clearly don't respect him at all.
Blessings,
Fairlight

 

[elkanahtyler]

Tejero does what he wants to do when he wants to do it.
His ladies do not do what he wants them to do when he wants them to do it.

Tejero's ladies do what they want when they want to do it.
Tejero often does not do what his ladies want him to do, especially if he disagrees with it or feels it is wrong.
Tejero does not live in a matriarchy, the matriarchy of his own ladies, and he is not subject to their unpleasant ways.
Each professed and manifested genuine faith in Jesus Christ as their Savior and God when they became mine.
Tejero lives in a family characterized by carnality, childishness, envy, jealousy, wrangling, factions and strife.
***1 Corinthians 3: 1 Brothers, I was not able to speak to you as spiritual people but as carnal people of the flesh, as babies in Christ. 2 I fed you milk, not solid food, because you were not yet able to receive it. In fact, you are still not able, 3 because you are still fleshly. For since there is envying, jealousy, wrangling, factions and strife among you, are you not fleshly and living like merely ordinary people?

 

[elkanahtyler]

Replying to John and his article
"Conclusion: 1. The wife of an ungodly husband may leave her husband if she and/or her children are in danger from him."

Yes but if she and he are genuinely saved it is according to 1 Cor 1:10,11,39. If only she is saved, then she is still maritally bound as long as he wants to maritally house with her, and hasn't left her (1 Cor 7:13,15,39)

2. The wife of an ungodly husband is permitted to leave her husband as a choice, by her desire, but such is not the will of God and will have eternal as well as temporal consequences, which will include the loss of leadership and protection.

Agreed

3. The wife of an unbelieving husband that is rejected or abandoned by him is free to remarry a godly man, only.

Agreed

4. The wife of a godly husband is permitted to leave her husband as a choice, by her desire, but such is not the will of God and will have eternal as well as temporal consequences, which will include the loss of leadership, protection from the husband, but possibly also from God. It is unreasonable to ask God to provide in another way, what He has already provided by a godly husband.

agreed

5. God has never recorded in scripture, instructions justifying a wife to leave or divorce a godly husband. He has however, permitted her to exercise her self-will with sure consequences. In doing so, she is under obligation to not break the marriage bond by establishing relations with another man. Such separation is to be temporary, for the purpose of repentance on either party’s part and healing of the soul.

agreed

6. For a godly husband to attempt to force his wife to remain against her will thwarts the power of the Holy Spirit to work in her heart. His task is to be consistent in his walk with God and to love his wife with all his heart, as he loves God. It is the epitome of the husband’s role to love his wife, with the love of God.

Agreed

 

[steve]

are these "free-range" (fending for themselves) wives, or does tejero the patriarch provide for them?
i have noticed that it really hard to "guide" a self supporting, autonomous person.

 

[Anonymous]

Tejero does what he wants to do when he wants to do it.
His ladies do not do what he wants them to do when he wants them to do it.

Selfishness + Matriarchy is a poor foundation for marriage. Where does God fit in with this equation?

Each professed and manifested genuine faith in Jesus Christ as their Savior and God when they became mine.

Yet they've chosen to disregard God's hierarchy of authority and completely disrespect their husband. Tejero's wives may have been saved but did they embrace plural marriage and/or show an enthusiasm for it ?

Tejero lives in a family characterized by carnality, childishness, envy, jealousy, wrangling, factions and strife.

Why ?
I think it's time that Tejero man-up and put his foot down !!!
Blessings,
Fairlight

 

[elkanahtyler]

are these "free-range" (fending for themselves) wives, or does tejero the patriarch provide for them?
i have noticed that it really hard to "guide" a self supporting, autonomous person.

Tejero and each of his own ladies have their own independent income. Tejero financially and materially helps each as each has need and he has the ability. The ladies contribute no money to each other. Tejero's polygyny is not a model or example of godly polygyny with respect to the relationships between Tejero and the ladies, and the ladies with each other. They became Tejero's ladies because they wanted Tejero, not because they wanted polygyny. Each would prefer to have me in monogyny. The shepherd can lead and call out, but it is up to the sheep to follow &/or listen. Tejero is not the best shepherd, but at least he tries. He doesn't expect the Farilights of this world to understand, especially that putting one's food down on one's ladies is not 2 Tim 2:24-26 or 1 Peter 3:7. When Jesus was on earth, He washed his disciple's dirty feet,
and didn't put His food down on them.

 

[Anonymous]

He doesn't expect the Farilights of this world to understand, especially that putting one's food down on one's ladies is not 2 Tim 2:24-26 or 1 Peter 3:7. When Jesus was on earth, He washed his disciple's dirty feet,
and didn't put His food down on them.

No, of course Jesus didn't "put his foot down ON THEM"...but HE did LEAD them and they followed HIS LEADERSHIP. "Tejero" has not been the leader in his family and he is suffering the consequences because of that. Biblical polygyny is not abusive but the Bible has clearly laid out an heirarchy of authority. It would be nice if Tejero paid attention to ALL the verses pertaining to marriage and the family. Clearly Tejero's way isn't working out too well.

Tejero's polygyny is not a model or example of godly polygyny with respect to the relationships between Tejero and the ladies, and the ladies with each other. They became Tejero's ladies because they wanted Tejero, not because they wanted polygyny. Each would prefer to have me in monogyny.

Yes, I agree....and marrying women who never wanted to be part of a polygynous family is a recipe for dysfunction and/or failure.
Blessings,
Fairlight

 

[elkanahtyler]

Fairlight wrote: "It would be nice if Tejero paid attention to ALL the verses pertaining to marriage and the family."

Please let Tejero know and me know which Scriptures pertaining to marriage and family Tejero has failed to pay attention to, so the problem can be worked on. How do you know Tejero failed to pay attention to them?

 

[Anonymous]

Please let Tejero know and me know which Scriptures pertaining to marriage and family Tejero has failed to pay attention to

Oh that would take all the fun out of it for Tejero ! He needs to look them up for himself

How do you know Tejero failed to pay attention to them?

Go back and read Tejero's original post. That's how I know...it's fairly obvious.
Blessings to Tejero,
Fairlight

 

[God_Is_My_Judge]

It would appear to me that Tejero made some mistakes in his young life. It would also appear that he is fully aware of this and needs no one to remind him of it. I bet he definately knows all about the flaws in his situation with all the causes and effects throughout the years that lead up to it better than we do, and needs no one to harass him with unwanted advice and platitudinous reprimands. It strikes me odd that Tejero never asked for advice, maybe he understands that women and people in general have a mind of their own and he can't force them to do anything and at this point can only pray for them. Maybe an appropriate response to what he said would be "wow that's a harsh situation you have landed in there, I'll be praying for you and your wives" so I guess that's my reply to him.

 

[Isabella]

Re: Asking for advice

I agree with you, people make mistakes, I think there are many people here and in other places that have made unfortunate relationship choices over the years that they now regret. However, I think there is a big problem when someone choses to tell, advise and educate other people, when they haven't actually got their own houses in order.
It is something I am seeing over and over again and I just don't understand it.

Bels

 

[steve]

just a question here to clarify;
do any of tehero's ladies ever share their bed with any other man?
not trying to be confrontive here, just making sure that we are on the same page

 

[God_Is_My_Judge]

Re: Asking for advice

I agree with you, people make mistakes, I think there are many people here and in other places that have made unfortunate relationship choices over the years that they now regret. However, I think there is a big problem when someone choses to tell, advise and educate other people, when they haven't actually got their own houses in order.
It is something I am seeing over and over again and I just don't understand it.

Bels

I agree with you but to be honest, I read this whole thread pretty thoroughly and didn't see any attempt at advice or education on Tejero's part, just a series of statements about his personal situation. Also, what really frightens me, are people who teach, ect. as you are saying and act perfect, but who are really just hiding some far uglier skeletons in their closet behind that Godly facade and all of their great swelling words of emptiness. I do appreciate that you gave an honest plainly spoken reply and didn't mince words or try to act all phony-holier than thou though. I like real, honest people, feel free to PM me
~Dan

 

[Isabella]

That is really kind of you Dan.
I appreciate I am allowed on here with the indulgence of the other regular posters who put up with such a wild woman in their midst!
I have a very strong belief in and respect for all people trying to form strong poly relationships in this world which is widely unsupportive of us.
I hope that that support and respect crosses all our other boundaries.

kindest regards,
Bels

 

[Anonymous]

It would appear to me that Tejero made some mistakes in his young life. It would also appear that he is fully aware of this and needs no one to remind him of it. I bet he definately knows all about the flaws in his situation with all the causes and effects throughout the years that lead up to it better than we do, and needs no one to harass him with unwanted advice and platitudinous reprimands. It strikes me odd that Tejero never asked for advice, maybe he understands that women and people in general have a mind of their own and he can't force them to do anything and at this point can only pray for them. Maybe an appropriate response to what he said would be "wow that's a harsh situation you have landed in there, I'll be praying for you and your wives" so I guess that's my reply to him.

Without going into any unnecessary or embarrassing details. My responses to Tejero were based on my many experiences dealing with him over the last three years.

I think there is a big problem when someone choses to tell, advise and educate other people, when they haven't actually got their own houses in order.

I agree !!!
Blessings,
Fairlight