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Stand firm or stick to the shadows?

MeganC said:
It's always a surprise when women discover something pleasing to their true and wholesome nature. I also think some of these women are surprised to discover they had a wholesome side at all.
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I’ve been saying for a while that the current way polygyny is perceived by men and women is backwards. If we were honest and objective about it, women should be flocking to it and the men should be running from it. Yes, then women have to share their husband, but they also receive a ton of benefits from the situation. Her biggest hurdle is the emotional aspect. Once past that, it is extremely beneficial. On the men’s side, it requires him to have to step up and lean into the things that make the best quality of men so valuable. And it’s not just initially either. Assuming he has multiple wives of child conceiving age, he must constantly be growing in all aspects of his life (which is not a bad thing). Each new wife or child requires him to evaluate, adjust, grow, and overcome in order to ensure that his family is fulfilled and operating smoothly. Many men like the idea of polygyny, but few men are truly capable of doing it in a God honoring way. Just my humble opinion.
 
PaulP said:
I’ve been saying for a while that the current way polygyny is perceived by men and women is backwards. If we were honest and objective about it, women should be flocking to it and the men should be running from it. Yes, then women have to share their husband, but they also receive a ton of benefits from the situation. Her biggest hurdle is the emotional aspect. Once past that, it is extremely beneficial. On the men’s side, it requires him to have to step up and lean into the things that make the best quality of men so valuable. And it’s not just initially either. Assuming he has multiple wives of child conceiving age, he must constantly be growing in all aspects of his life (which is not a bad thing). Each new wife or child requires him to evaluate, adjust, grow, and overcome in order to ensure that his family is fulfilled and operating smoothly. Many men like the idea of polygyny, but few men are truly capable of doing it in a God honoring way. Just my humble opinion.
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It must be also beneficial for men too. Otherwise men would run from any possibility of being married with at least two women.
 
MemeFan said:
It must be also beneficial for men too. Otherwise men would run from any possibility of being married with at least two women.
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It is beneficial to the man also. Just in different ways. I think in the day to day life it is easier to see the benefits for a woman. A traditional mom/wife in monogamy will be ran ragged trying to keep up with everything. The same woman in polygyny has other women to share the burden. As a man, we achieve and I see the benefits in a more long term scale. Much like our roles in a secular monogamous marriage. A man takes on the duty and responsibilities of a father because of the long term gain of a family. If he only looks at the weight added to his shoulders, he would probably just find a woman to have sex with. This is what the MGTOW movement is completely missing out on.
 
MeganC said:
It's always a surprise when women discover something pleasing to their true and wholesome nature. I also think some of these women are surprised to discover they had a wholesome side at all.
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I've noticed that a fun test of a self proclaimed feminist is if they believe a woman has the right to choose to follow that nature. It's one of the paradoxes - the idea that a woman is "free to choose" but if she chooses domesticity, marriage, motherhood, she's inherently oppressed.

Yet ironically, many of them are anti-capitalists also. Which, if you look at how oppressive and joyless a huge percentage of women find the workplace after pursuing the career climb, is ironic. How awful is a system that doesn't force women to participate in that? ;)
 
PaulP said:
It is beneficial to the man also. Just in different ways. I think in the day to day life it is easier to see the benefits for a woman. A traditional mom/wife in monogamy will be ran ragged trying to keep up with everything. The same woman in polygyny has other women to share the burden. As a man, we achieve and I see the benefits in a more long term scale. Much like our roles in a secular monogamous marriage. A man takes on the duty and responsibilities of a father because of the long term gain of a family. If he only looks at the weight added to his shoulders, he would probably just find a woman to have sex with. This is what the MGTOW movement is completely missing out on.
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This is one reason I find the "polygamy is about sex" misunderstanding so amusing. Yes, there's sexual benefits for high drive husbands (and wives) but there are much simpler, less complicated ways for one to simply pursue sex. Which is also why plural isn't a solution to adultery directly. A man who won't honor one commitment shouldn't be taking on another one. Not saying the drive to be with more than one can't indicate part of a capacity for it, but again, there are way simpler ways. Not to be crude but a weak man who can't handle an actual second relationship, the material, emotional, spiritual and time responsibilities of it, could deal with his "immediate" urge in five minutes without the drama.
 
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