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What are multiple moms called by their kids?

Bartato said:
If you are willing to share, how does your family go about this issue? This is all hypothetical or theoretical for most of us. You actually live it.
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We don't really have any rules about it. I usually get called mama or mommy when the kids speak to me and when they talk about me it's Mama Megan. They do mostly the same with Cyd, Macy, and Amy but the older kids sometimes just call Amy by her name and she's okay with this. I don't think it would bother me much if anyone called me Megan. It would be weird but I'd be okay with it if it ever happened. I do notice it changes over time what the kids say like they used to be more formal with the Mama Megan, Mama Cydne, Mama Macy stuff and then it just got shorter.

Steve is always dad to the boys and daddy to the girls.
 
MeganC said:
We don't really have any rules about it. I usually get called mama or mommy when the kids speak to me and when they talk about me it's Mama Megan. They do mostly the same with Cyd, Macy, and Amy but the older kids sometimes just call Amy by her name and she's okay with this. I don't think it would bother me much if anyone called me Megan. It would be weird but I'd be okay with it if it ever happened. I do notice it changes over time what the kids say like they used to be more formal with the Mama Megan, Mama Cydne, Mama Macy stuff and then it just got shorter.

Steve is always dad to the boys and daddy to the girls.
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Thank you for sharing. Much appreciated 👍
 
Leslie Pease said:
Ok so funny question maybe.. Lol how do your kids differentiate between calling different moms in your houses?? Like do they all call you different names? Do you just know the difference in each kids voice so you know whos calling which mom? Like when they say "mom!" are all the moms in the house like "what?!" And then what do you do? Haha I know it's probably not a big deal but my husband married my sister so I'm not sure how different our kids are gonna be sounding compared to each other and I kinda like the idea of us being mom to each others kids..it seems that it would bring a home closer together than segregate it.
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In my experience the kids call each mom Momma A or Momma B depending on their name. So like Momma Amy or Momma Charlotte.
 
Sam Speaks said:
If the women consider themselves sister-wives then why shouldn’t the children call the other woman Aunt [first name]. She is not related by blood, but neither is the woman who marries your uncle.
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An aunt doesnt have the same authority as a mom. And they are acting like a mom to the other woman's children, not just popping in and out of the house every once in a while like an aunt would. They are a full time mom to the other womans children just like their birth mom(if both moms are living in the same house together that is.)
 
Leslie Pease said:
An aunt doesnt have the same authority as a mom. And they are acting like a mom to the other woman's children, not just popping in and out of the house every once in a while like an aunt would. They are a full time mom to the other womans children just like their birth mom(if both moms are living in the same house together that is.)
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Exactly.
 
I was talking with a lady friend yesterday, and I was telling her why I want to call the other mom "Stepmommy" and not aunt or by given name. And she gave me the idea of: instead of calling her "Stepmommy", I can call her "mom" in a different language. And I think I might do that instead. 😄
 
Leslie Pease said:
An aunt doesnt have the same authority as a mom. And they are acting like a mom to the other woman's children, not just popping in and out of the house every once in a while like an aunt would. They are a full time mom to the other womans children just like their birth mom(if both moms are living in the same house together that is.)
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I dont know about you all but when Aunt Sandy or Aunt Nina told "Jack-Allen"(always with the middle name) I had better well get after it and obey!
 
Emily said:
I was talking with a lady friend yesterday, and I was telling her why I want to call the other mom "Stepmommy" and not aunt or by given name. And she gave me the idea of: instead of calling her "Stepmommy", I can call her "mom" in a different language. And I think I might do that instead. 😄
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Thats what we ended up deciding to do for my sister. She is going to be called the hebrew word for mom.
 
I think it makes a difference how old the kids are. You join a family with adult children they clearly aren't going to start calling you Mom. You have a family with babies, then they grow up knowing "other mom" has authority over them. It doesn't really matter what name is used as long as everyone is comfortable. You understand the relationship boundaries no matter what name is used. If they are teenagers, insisting they use a particular name is basically asking for a fight, as long as it's respectful let them have a say. My kids (8 and 10 originally, 18 and 20 now) call my husband and my sisterwife by their first names, but if a stranger/teacher/school friend said "who is that?" They would answer "oh it's my step mom/ stepdad". Nobody has ever questioned how they live with Mom and step Mom at the same time. People are just so used to blended families they never really think it through.
 
Emily said:
I was talking with a lady friend yesterday, and I was telling her why I want to call the other mom "Stepmommy" and not aunt or by given name. And she gave me the idea of: instead of calling her "Stepmommy", I can call her "mom" in a different language. And I think I might do that instead. 😄
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I think this is a great idea
 
eternitee said:
I think it makes a difference how old the kids are.
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I agree. We have four over 18 and they are no way going to feel someone just a few years older is an authority figure, or a mom. They already know her by her first name. They are respectful, but they have a mom and I'm still here. My dad remarried after he and my mom divorced. I call my step mom by her first name. She is not my mom. My mom is still living. I do call my mother in law mom.

*shrugs*

I'm sure it will be different with younger children.
 
NickF said:
I'm from the south, and it's a normal honorific for a close family friend to be given a title of aunt or uncle. So a close friend of my mom has always been Aunt Deb. No blood relation but she's always been my aunt. It's always been a term of endearment and easy to explain. So IMHO if it were ever an issue where you needed to be wise as a serpent and harmless as a dove, it seems like the most non-jarring term to use would be aunt. Sometimes children can speak when they should be silent, or say more than is wise, or miscommunicate and cause undue drama through poor choice in words. Some of those instances could cause a degree of danger or scrutiny that is not desired or warranted. I say, blend in best you can and go with a soft, accepted term.
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I can second this. As southerners we can make anyone a relative lol. My niece calls my friend's "Aunt+ their name." I was going to suggest calling the other mother's- Mother then insert their name.
 
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