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Prayer request For a godly virgin woman
- Thread starter James337
- Start date
Exactly. So if he did not "endow her to be his wife", he has disobeyed God, and therefore sinned.
Indeed.
FollowingHim gave you a more polite reply than I think I could manage. I'll defer to his patience and wisdom.
I want to clarify something @James337, because we may have come across overly critical here.
But do continue to pray for what is ideal, and most importantly for the welfare of the woman (women) who is already out there and whom God has planned to be your wife (or wives). Just don't decide you will ONLY consider that ideal, or you might actually miss the very woman God has actually lined up for you. Life is not ideal.
That is actually an entirely reasonable prayer. The ideal woman to find is a godly virgin, and it is perfectly reasonable to pray to find the ideal. Furthermore, if you recognise that your future wife already exists, you can start praying for her today. Pray for her welfare, pray God protects her from the temptations of the world. And certainly pray that she keeps herself pure for you - not just for your own pleasure / preference, but rather because if she can marry as a virgin and be with you for the rest of her life that will simplify her own life and make it better than it would have been had she gone through a more messy path before reaching you.
That statement threw this entire conversation. Although it is entirely reasonable to desire your wife to be a virgin, to rule out dating all women who are not virgins is an entirely different matter and does not reflect God's forgiveness. That's what most of us called you out on.
But do continue to pray for what is ideal, and most importantly for the welfare of the woman (women) who is already out there and whom God has planned to be your wife (or wives). Just don't decide you will ONLY consider that ideal, or you might actually miss the very woman God has actually lined up for you. Life is not ideal.
Brother, I encourage you to focus on personal growth. Instead of focusing on finding the ideal woman, what are you doing to become the perfect husband? Chastity on your part is a good start, but it doesn’t begin to qualify you as an ideal husband.
You have beliefs that you are very adamant about and you seem somewhat idealistic. Sometimes those things don’t mix well with marriage. Quite frankly, I found that my own idealism mellowed with age and I became adamant about values that I hadn’t had in my youth.
Relax, pray for your own growth in addition to praying for your future wife. It’s a long journey, often made excessively complicated by not waiting for Yah’s timing.
You have beliefs that you are very adamant about and you seem somewhat idealistic. Sometimes those things don’t mix well with marriage. Quite frankly, I found that my own idealism mellowed with age and I became adamant about values that I hadn’t had in my youth.
Relax, pray for your own growth in addition to praying for your future wife. It’s a long journey, often made excessively complicated by not waiting for Yah’s timing.
Another thought to add to this conversation: Neither Ruth nor Abigail were virgins when they married Boaz and David respectfully, and yet there was no sin whatsoever that took place. I knew a wonderful couple where the husband passed away at a very young age, and his lovely wife, was pregnant with their first and only child. I would probably have considered marrying her, if I had known that there is nothing wrong with having more than one wife.
To double-down, Ruth was given the incredible honor of being included in our Savior’s lineage.
Even Bathsheba, although she was taken in sin was honored to be the mother of Solomon and also in the lineage.
Don’t despise any in whom Yah sees potential.
Rahab too. I'm pretty sure she was in the line, and she was far from without sin! A prostitute no less.
[Totally a tangent, but the young couple who are buying our house named their baby daughter Rahab.]
Good points, @FollowingHim, but I'm just going to throw in my 2 cents here and assert that, if God has actually lined up a particular woman for @James337 (or anyone else, for that matter), I'm thinking there's no way he is going to be able to miss her.
@James337, two things:
1. I'm intrigued by your username, for a number of reasons, including:
What I pray is that you will find a wife who loves God, who adores you, who has the capability of calling forth your entire potential for leadership, who longs to submit to that leadership, who thrives under your provision and protection, and who awakens the gateways of tremendous passion with which our Father has endowed you. Virgin or not, it won't take you long at all to forget whether she was or wasn't -- or even why you considered it to be so essential.
1. I'm intrigued by your username, for a number of reasons, including:
a. It, as do some of the comments you've made thus far, reminds me of a former participant here with a similar username. I welcome you among us, just as I would very much welcome that young man if he were to return.
b. I wondered if you had chosen a Bible verse, but, alas, there is no 37th verse in James 3, nor is there a 37th chapter in James -- which led me to wonder if you were referring to James 3-7?
2. @FollowingHim, @steve, @Daniel DeLuca, @FollowingHim2, @frederick, @MeganC, @eye4them and @Gary Slaughenhaupt have all had great comments, many of them taking the words right out of my mouth, but I will just add that, in my humble opinion, there is a New Puritanism afoot in our land that has made very cozy bedfellows of Marxist postmodern feminists and certain fundamentalist Christians who are challenged by abstract constructs. Both, when it comes down to it -- and this is why they joined forces beginning in the 1980s -- are just downright antisexual. And thus they have, in my humble opinion, elevated themselves to a status higher than our Creator, because they deign to declare as foul the manner in which God created us. Be careful who you listen to about such subjects, and evaluate whether they are either properly representing God and Scripture or keeping your best interests in their hearts. Something to watch out for -- especially with preachers -- is a tendency to represent personal preferences masquerading as the thoughts of God. I've encountered many a priest or pastor who can't seem to get through one sermon or homily without decrying the sins of sexuality -- as if that is the overarching focus of Scripture. In the end, what they're telling you is that they themselves have unresolved hang-ups about sex, and they want to see themselves as sanctimonious for laying them off on you as well.b. I wondered if you had chosen a Bible verse, but, alas, there is no 37th verse in James 3, nor is there a 37th chapter in James -- which led me to wonder if you were referring to James 3-7?
What I pray is that you will find a wife who loves God, who adores you, who has the capability of calling forth your entire potential for leadership, who longs to submit to that leadership, who thrives under your provision and protection, and who awakens the gateways of tremendous passion with which our Father has endowed you. Virgin or not, it won't take you long at all to forget whether she was or wasn't -- or even why you considered it to be so essential.
A thought that came to mind here; God had lined up the Promised Land for the Israelites when they came out of Egypt but they mucked up badly and thousands missed it, dying while wandering in the wilderness. They missed it because they didn't walk by faith and it doesn't seem impossible to me that any of us might do the same, missing His blessings because we don't walk by faith for the blessings He offers.
Just a random thought; my $0.02
I see God's plans as rather multi-dimensional.
It's easy to think of His plan as like a line drawn on a paper map - if you go off the line, well you just went off the plan, better see if you can find your way back to that line and if you can't get back there any more that's just too bad.
But in reality, His plans are more like a GPS unit. He has an ideal plan for your life from where you are right now, and that's marked on the map for you if you follow it. BUT, if you miss that, the map recalculates, and there is a NEW ideal plan for you from where you are today. By definition, it cannot be as good as the first plan, because that was the optimal. But it is the best plan from where you are now. If you miss that, there will be another, and another, until you die. Of course, God knows what you'll do in advance, but that's a separate point.
So He may have a woman lined up as the perfect woman for you, who you will meet as you follow the plan He has for your life. But you might not follow that plan, could go somewhere else, and miss her entirely. No worries - He'll have another plan lined up for you the moment you turn and start following Him. It too will be an awesome plan, but won't be as good as the original. Maybe you'll even meet back up with that same woman, but instead of marrying her at 19 as He originally planned, you'll marry her at 40 and take on a bunch of kids she's had to another man, and you'll never have the children with her that God had originally intended you to have. Of course you'll never know what God's original plan was, so you'll just find it awesome that you found her at 40. Or maybe you'll then reject her because of her past and never taste anything of what God had planned for the two of you at all.
If God decides that you WILL meet her at 19 and marry her, of course that will happen, nobody can resist His will. But I don't think he usually forces his will on us, He has given us free will of our own for a reason.
Yep, I'm just one blind man reading braille elephant, @frederick and @FollowingHim!
I suppose it all depends on one's definition of "lined up." The Promised Land was part of a Covenant, so God lined up the Promise Land for those who did as they were told. Many didn't make it, including Moses, because their faith and obedience wavered. If God lines up a wife for one of us but makes clear that there are hoops to jump through to get to marry her, then that would be analogous to what you're positing. I wasn't entirely clear about it, but I was taking a more focused, literal view of what @FollowingHim wrote ("you might actually miss the very woman God has actually lined up for you"), taking the article 'the' preceding 'very woman' to indicate that there was just one particular woman God had lined up for the one particular James337 in his hypothetical example, focusing also on that James337 might "actually miss" that one particular woman. I just have to wonder why God would bother lining up a woman for James337 if He (being Omnisicent and All) knows that James337 is just going to fail to take advantage of the opportunity. Wouldn't a Sovereign God have a greater success quotient than that? Of course, He might just want to throw spaghetti at the wall to see if it sticks, simply because the exercise delights Him. Who am I to question our LORD if that's his inclination, right?
I lean toward the wisdom expressed by those who assert that our best plans involve preparing ourselves to be the best possible husbands for our future mates -- and the wisdom expressed by those who assert that our best bet is being patient for God's timing (even if it eventually becomes obvious that His timing for us in that realm is that it's never going to happen).
And you know I love you dearly, @FollowingHim, but, no matter how much any of us studies His Word, we can never approach certainly about what God has planned for us or even what His Mind is about those plans outside of what he has made explicit, so I do bristle a little bit when I read something like, "But in reality, His plans are more like a GPS unit." I have unlimited room for you or anyone else believing that you have figured God out better than others, because (at least here in a group like this) we're all striving to know the Mind of God, but each of us as individuals could only possibly fully know His Mind if we were God, so be careful about attaching the 'reality' label to assert dominance of your perspective over that of another brother's.
I suppose it all depends on one's definition of "lined up." The Promised Land was part of a Covenant, so God lined up the Promise Land for those who did as they were told. Many didn't make it, including Moses, because their faith and obedience wavered. If God lines up a wife for one of us but makes clear that there are hoops to jump through to get to marry her, then that would be analogous to what you're positing. I wasn't entirely clear about it, but I was taking a more focused, literal view of what @FollowingHim wrote ("you might actually miss the very woman God has actually lined up for you"), taking the article 'the' preceding 'very woman' to indicate that there was just one particular woman God had lined up for the one particular James337 in his hypothetical example, focusing also on that James337 might "actually miss" that one particular woman. I just have to wonder why God would bother lining up a woman for James337 if He (being Omnisicent and All) knows that James337 is just going to fail to take advantage of the opportunity. Wouldn't a Sovereign God have a greater success quotient than that? Of course, He might just want to throw spaghetti at the wall to see if it sticks, simply because the exercise delights Him. Who am I to question our LORD if that's his inclination, right?
I lean toward the wisdom expressed by those who assert that our best plans involve preparing ourselves to be the best possible husbands for our future mates -- and the wisdom expressed by those who assert that our best bet is being patient for God's timing (even if it eventually becomes obvious that His timing for us in that realm is that it's never going to happen).
And you know I love you dearly, @FollowingHim, but, no matter how much any of us studies His Word, we can never approach certainly about what God has planned for us or even what His Mind is about those plans outside of what he has made explicit, so I do bristle a little bit when I read something like, "But in reality, His plans are more like a GPS unit." I have unlimited room for you or anyone else believing that you have figured God out better than others, because (at least here in a group like this) we're all striving to know the Mind of God, but each of us as individuals could only possibly fully know His Mind if we were God, so be careful about attaching the 'reality' label to assert dominance of your perspective over that of another brother's.
Fair point. In fact it's not that different to what I was saying was 'reality'. I was basically saying that in reality God's planning process, whatever it is, is likely beyond our comprehension. But that analogy of its complexity helps my fallible human brain to make some sense of how His plans relate to humans. I may have used the word "reality" in the wrong way.
You can ask ..but are you worthy
I would suggest if you are a man that loves god, and is of substance and real character you will have a better than average chance of attracting a “Godly woman”
If you have no options in front of you then maybe you are not the man you think you are
And it would help to do some honest self evaluation
Or put another way
If you have nothing to offer you are not that attractive to a woman of substance
Sometimes it’s not as simple as
I want, I ask , I get
I would suggest if you are a man that loves god, and is of substance and real character you will have a better than average chance of attracting a “Godly woman”
If you have no options in front of you then maybe you are not the man you think you are
And it would help to do some honest self evaluation
Or put another way
If you have nothing to offer you are not that attractive to a woman of substance
Sometimes it’s not as simple as
I want, I ask , I get
This is an aside, but I feel that it is part of the picture touching on the OP.
Yah gave us a free will, an ability to ignore His will.
This is exactly why Yeshua taught us to pray “Thy Kingdom come, Thy will be done.....”
It’s really quite a pointless prayer if His will is going to be done at the end of the day no matter what our choices are.
He is willing that none should perish, but yet so many do.
Yah gave us a free will, an ability to ignore His will.
This is exactly why Yeshua taught us to pray “Thy Kingdom come, Thy will be done.....”
It’s really quite a pointless prayer if His will is going to be done at the end of the day no matter what our choices are.
He is willing that none should perish, but yet so many do.
@James337
I hope that you don’t feel beaten up by these responses to your posts.
This forum is filled with strong, deep thinkers and we believe that iron does sharpen iron. Sparks fly, but we have your best interest at heart.
You want friends?
You probably won’t find a better group than this. They would go with you through thick and thin, but truth will always be of paramount importance.
I hope that you don’t feel beaten up by these responses to your posts.
This forum is filled with strong, deep thinkers and we believe that iron does sharpen iron. Sparks fly, but we have your best interest at heart.
You want friends?
You probably won’t find a better group than this. They would go with you through thick and thin, but truth will always be of paramount importance.
I don't want to derail this thread but I think it's important we understand the passage correctly which is being referred to here.
The reference is from 2 Peter 3:9; The Lord is not slack concerning His promise, as some count slackness, but is longsuffering toward us, not willing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance.
In context, Peter is writing to refute the notion that God is slack concerning the promise of the Second Coming of our Lord. The time is part of God's redemptive plan; the salvation of sinners. A check of the Greek grammar reveals that the words "us", "any", and "all" are referring to the same people. They are those of the same redemptive situation as Peter himself. God is longsuffering, so once all of "us" have come to repentance, He will exercise divine wrath and judgment; Christ will return. Not one of God's people will perish. This passage is not a proof text for God being unable to fulfil His will. It actually proves the exact opposite. Shalom