Due to some reported problems with single women being approached in an unwanted manner by men, we have updated the private messaging permissions, as explained in the rules at the start of this thread (updated today).
Now, when a person first signs up to the website, they can send and receive private conversations, but only with ministry staff. This means that, for example, a woman in a difficult situation who wishes to immediately contact the ladies ministry confidentially can do so with no restrictions. However, a newly signed up single woman cannot be contacted by anybody other than staff, so she cannot be turned away from the forum by an unwanted approach. It also provides protection against scammers - they can only contact the staff, so we're the only ones at risk of being conned into sending thousands of dollars to Nigeria!
Once the person has interacted on the forum to a certain degree (exact threshold deliberately not stated), they will automatically receive the ability to start private conversations with anybody, and receive private conversations from anybody. At that stage, the staff have absolutely no control over who talks to who about what, but it is hoped that by that stage everybody will have had enough interaction here to know that we're mostly good people so even if they have one negative interaction they will know that is not representative of the ministry as a whole - and will know they can report it to staff if they have serious concerns.
This is hopefully a fair balance between the need to protect individuals from abuse and protect the ministry from being misrepresented, and the need to provide people with the ability to communicate privately to give and receive confidential marriage support.
All new signups will also now receive a welcome message, which includes pointing them to these rules so they understand what is considered inappropriate use of the private messaging system.