intro from east

[SouthernCross]

Welcome aerockk. I am in similar situation to yours, in which I have been led to Christian poly through the affections of my heart, and have since done the research to help my head catch up! You can read my intro describing those circumstances here viewtopic.php?f=32&t=4303 I pray that the Lord will guide and bless you as you work through the particulars of your situation - and will be following your story with interest!
I understand and agree with the wise advice given by many here, which is to help a wife come to an understanding of Biblical poly by separating the Biblical foundation from any particular situation. It is rather more complicated, however, when to even raise the abstract idea of Christian poly brings to a wife's mind the 'other' woman mentioned by her husband (and in your case living under your roof). It is nice to hear from another brother coming to things from this end, and I look forward to swapping stories and advice with you!

 

[aklirich]

@aerockk, How is your family doing now? With submerging yourself in the word, prayer and fasting, you will keep the enemy at bay from your home. As you take up the role of the pastor of your home (which you are); laying your hands on your wife when she is sick, share the scripture together regularly (not necessarily only on marriage) and so on, you will gradually keep the enemy at bay from your home.

A little thought, Eve was tempted when she was alone....... you need to continue to cover your wife with the word and with prayers.

 

[aerockk]

Alirich
Everything is going good thanks for asking.
Southern Cross
I did read your post before I did mine.How are things going for you?
I am amazed at support that is found here which is much needed because without this fellowship it would be a lonely for most.
Aerockk

 

[CecilW]

Are we pragmatists or followers of Christ?

Seconding the answer "Both". It is a proven truism that ...

Folks won't care how much you know until they know how much you care.

Jesus used this technique often by first healing everyone who needed it, then teaching. (And sometimes t'other way round.)

It seems likely that if a man takes his wife onto his lap, puts his arms around her, and tells her that her pain is his own, as they are united in love, then lets her cry and talk and push him away & pound on his chest & get whatever she needs to get out out, all within the acceptance & safety of his loving arms, it might just go a long way towards fixing things. At least so say several women I've asked...

What is MY authority to speak? 15 years ago, I tried the other approach. Tried to teach theology. Tried to logically explain to my dearly beloved wife of 20 years why she should simply change the way she felt. Why it was wrong to feel as though a dagger had been shoved into her chest & was being repeatedly twisted!

I lost her. Heartbreak & tragedy. Not only for thew two of us, but for our 4 children as well.

Don't DO dat! Teach the Word, to be sure. But please! FOCUS on healing the pain as much as possible via extreme & blatant CARING.

Now the folks who are doing it successfully are free to correct any mistake in this suggestion. I know that they are Teaching the Word ALSO.