It’s marital capitalism.
The women that bring the most to the table should be able to pick from the best that is available. And vice versa.
There should be no argument about qualifications.
What should be and what is are two different things.
You're correct; it's marital capitalism, but, as men, we can't escape that we're currently living in a world in which 80+% of the women have been hypnotized into believing they 'deserve' men in the top 10-20%. The
only way that could actually work would be widespread acceptance of polygamy (not possible at present) combined with widespread acceptance of the bottom 80% of men anesthetizing themselves with drugs that would make them not care that they're going to be basically partnerless.
What's called for is education for women that focuses on learning things about intersexual dynamics that
they just don't want to hear. But we're all just wasting our time whistling Dixie arguing about what men and women are currently doing wrong. We can all be potentially right about our arguments, but in the absence of women being enlightened about what their
reasonable mate expectations should be -- requiring that most rewards would be removed for female delusion -- it won't matter if we're right or wrong on either side. 80% of young women will simply continue ratcheting up their body counts with 20% of the young-to-early-middle-aged guys who are only rarely going to marry them, while those young women will simultaneously remain categorically unwilling to
formally share those top-20% guys as they continue to
informally offer themselves up to those same men for casual sex. This is the the ongoing condition of our times and, absent radical changes of approaches on the part of
men, this will only continue to gravitate toward what looks inevitable at this point in time:
90% of young women considering only
10% of young-to-early-middle-age (20-35 y.o.) men as attractive enough to qualify as potential sexual and marital mates.
The choice for men is to either (a) become full patriarchs and refrain from further rewarding women for exhibiting Female Independence Delusion (which is a strategy that has the potential for
forcing women to collectively reassess their presuppositions); or (b) accept the fact that, for most 20-35-year-old men (not to mention those of us who are older), for quite some time the only willing-and-able female mates are predominantly going to come from the
bottom 20% of women. Most of us married our current wives during a previous era not characterized by the current dynamics, but
young men are choosing from among women who have been entirely indoctrinated by our secular culture and were raised by
mothers and fathers who were themselves also entirely indoctrinated by government schools and our secular culture.
If, as men, we're unwilling to
expect appreciation and respectful cooperation from our women, we're in no position to expect anything but the dregs -- perhaps dregs with prairie dresses and head coverings who refrain from adultery but dregs nonetheless. The exceptions to this that will only prove the rule will probably continue to inspire wishful thinking among the remaining men, but, rather than the dynamic of whether or not we're
worthy,
male failure to promote and expect respectful cooperation (submission) with patriarchy will provide the nails that men continue to pound into their own coffins.
Risking boring those reading this, I'm convinced that anything that even remotely smacks of seeking female approval has nearly nothing to do with whether men seeking any form of marriage will successfully find women who are willing and prepared to be married to them. [I submit that it's almost axiomatic that the best list we might be able to make for what
not to do as men could be compiled by just asking the
women in our lives what they think we should do with our time, energy and resources.] We can find
sex partners, but even most among us who are ostensibly married but tolerate disobedience, demands for a full voice without full acceptance of responsibility, disrespect, or insufficient appreciation for the full range of provision, protection and due benevolence men collectively provide women are not even close to being in the type of relationship prescribed by Scripture -- or in alignment with common sense. Instead, we're in voluntary enslavement to our women.
And when we choose that path rather than standing tall and
expecting respectful cooperation we're also embarrassing ourselves no matter how much we convince ourselves that we're possessed of full manhood or wearing the pants in our family. Those who know me know I've had to confront this very thing in myself, so I'm not just callously casting aspersions. IYKYK, and OYKYCUI.
