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The Wife's Conscience vs. Husband's Will

My wife occasionally comments on attractive actors, but I am unable to comment on attractive actresses. Her reasoning is "men look at women differently than women look at men." She thinks men thinking a woman is attractive is thinking about sleeping with her, while women are not thinking sexually. She is very sensitive to "objectification" and I believe has bought into the lie of feminine moral superiority.
Society kind of teaches women that. It goes hand in hand with monogamy. We are always told that once a man is in love with you he will only ever want you and you will be the only one he considers as beautiful, and if he doesn't he doesn't love you.
Honestly a man can look a woman and find her beautiful without lusting after her. To turn it into objectification is to ruin something normal and good. Given lots of men have already ruined that by sinning and becoming real creep jobs but that's not every man and we shouldn't balk at what is normal.
 
It's true, women think differently, we "lust" differently. Nothing really to do with moral superiority, the thought process is fairly consistent among most women, in most cultures.
Oh are you in reference to things like sleazy romance novels and such? At first I was confused because I wouldn't say we lust differently. Lust is lust, girls just have less of a temptation, but yeah girls can fall headlong into the seductive romance side of things. Whereas with men it's more visual.
 
I don't know where you are meeting these girls, but they've probably been living a slutty life and need to repent or you are misunderstanding. Trust me your worry is for naught, in my whole 25 years of life and even talking with married women in their fourties chancing upon a guy naked is a horror story we will tell each other.
These women exist everywhere. And I wouldn’t even say they’re living a slutty life.
 
The reasons behind lust for women are very different from those for men. Even women infatuated with romance movies and novels desire most of the same characteristics in men that other women want as well, their desires are just on a cheaper, superficial level.

Most of the time, when married women are "lusting" after other men, the thought of sex isn't even involved, though it appears that way from the outside. They know it's safe to do so because both the man and themselves are off-limits; they know sex won't actually be attached to the idea.

In other words, it's just hen-talk ;)

It may also be the case that she wants to see how much attention she can get from that married man but has no actual desire to act on anything.
Would you please be so kind and explain a little more? Thanks
Even in cultures that are predominantly patriarchal, women will always struggle with the idea that their husbands desire other women. We don't think like men, we're monogamy-centered. We see the world through monogamous-eyes, the influence of the outside world didn't cause this, the way we're wired did.

This isn't to say that cultural influences don't play a role in how we handle such thoughts, but the thought was always there.
 
The reasons behind lust for women are very different from those for men. Even women infatuated with romance movies and novels desire most of the same characteristics in men that other women want as well, their desires are just on a cheaper, superficial level.

Most of the time, when married women are "lusting" after other men, the thought of sex isn't even involved, though it appears that way from the outside. They know it's safe to do so because both the man and themselves are off-limits; they know sex won't actually be attached to the idea.

In other words, it's just hen-talk ;)

It may also be the case that she wants to see how much attention she can get from that married man but has no actual desire to act on anything.

Even in cultures that are predominantly patriarchal, women will always struggle with the idea that their husbands desire other women. We don't think like men, we're monogamy-centered. We see the world through monogamous-eyes, the influence of the outside world didn't cause this, the way we're wired did.

This isn't to say that cultural influences don't play a role in how we handle such thoughts, but the thought was always there.
I like how you put quotation marks around women “lusting.”

Since lust is a desire to take possession of something that isn’t yours, it sounds like it’s probably not even a thing for us as we are the possession not the possessor…?
 
These women exist everywhere. And I wouldn’t even say they’re living a slutty life.
Fine. I changed my terminology. Let's put it this way: A married woman propositioning a married man who is not her husband is not acting in a decent and moral manner.
In fact it's a step below the usual as most girls in at least the US know that you don't cheat on your boyfriend which they consider a relationship not as strong as marriage.
 
Lusting is generally reserved for describing an intense sexual desire. It can also be used to describe an intense craving (as in she lusted for vanilla ice cream).

Since lust is a desire to take possession of something that isn’t yours, it sounds like it’s probably not even a thing for us as we are the possession not the possessor…?

I think this more describes covetousness.

Of course, this does not preclude coveting someone you also lust for.
 
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Lusting is generally reserved for describing an intense sexual desire. It can also be used to describe an intense craving (as in she lusted for vanilla ice cream).



I think this more describes covetousness.

Of course, this does not preclude coveting someone you also lust for.
Both Covetousness and lust have a negative connotation. They each have a technical definition apart from emotion. To "lust" is to desire and the context of usage tells us a righteous or unrighteous lust. "The Spirit lusteth against the flesh..." (God's Holy Spirit cannot sin therefore lusting is not a sin) I have deduced that Covet means to desire something that cannot be obtained legally, e.g. if the neighbors ox is not for sale then to continue to desire that would be coveting. "Thou shalt not..."
 
Both Covetousness and lust have a negative connotation. They each have a technical definition apart from emotion. To "lust" is to desire and the context of usage tells us a righteous or unrighteous lust. "The Spirit lusteth against the flesh..." (God's Holy Spirit cannot sin therefore lusting is not a sin) I have deduced that Covet means to desire something that cannot be obtained legally, e.g. if the neighbors ox is not for sale then to continue to desire that would be coveting. "Thou shalt not..."
I agree it doesn't always have a negative connotation especially in different contexts. (I heard it once used in argument that one shouldn't "lust" after their wife and I sat there like: "If my husband doesn't look at me and want to have sex we have a problem" But that all might just fall into some pious definition argument) In this case I think it has more than one definition like the word "novel" and you could replace lusteth with something like striving.
 
Hahaha! That is my kind of lust! <3
Very cute. But, what if you had no money to pay for vanilla ice cream? Your desperation(read that as covet) for Vanilla Ice Cream might lead you to steal it. Now what you have is the desire to obtain something that you cannot LEGALLY obtain. You still desire it but have no means to pay for it. Coveting leads to more sin than we can imagine- adultery, stealing, lying, murdering(like King David covering his adulterous tracks), dishonoring parents, making a deal with the devil(idolatry), dishonoring God, working on the designed day of rest, etc. Coveting is the first step down a painful road.
Now IF you have the money and the object is for sale then THAT is not coveting- yes i was able to get that F350 Turbodiesel 4X4 4 door Truck without going into debt! Yippee!! Cash- No bondage for this dog!
 
Very cute
Well it's a good thing I prefer chocolate anyway! That and I am lactose intolerant... I say while eating ice cream... Haha

Don't worry! Just because I want something does not mean I would begrudge another person having it. And just because I am poor and cannot afford it (which I have been mind you) doesn't mean I'm going to steal it. Not everyone is the Donner party. Some people would cannibalize before dying and others would rather starve to death. Everyone can be tempted but just because you are or you are in poor circumstances does not mean you will act on it.

As someone who has pretty much never had money, I rely on prayer, and God has always provided. He takes note of the sparrows and he's been kind enough to take care of me and that's the only way I've been able to have nice things. But don't mistake I've been working since my teenage years, so I'm not an idler just down on my luck.

(I'd be careful about what I say about David and using him as a bad example. God still does things for and reveres David throughout the scriptures after his death. I don't fully get it but there definitely seems to be something about the Lord's Anointed)

:)
 
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