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Time in the game

Mark C said:
One here some of the old-timers would remember, sadly a demonic issue, and abandonment; but I don't count her a loss as long as there is a possibility of t'shuvah. Call it ten years.

First one coming up on 50, still a joy and blessing every day.

And the newest, one year in one more week.

So call it 61 and counting.
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Another show off.
 
paterfamilias said:
Show off
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Well, the whole thread is in response to you showing off!

Seriously, "comparing scores" is a pointless pissing competition. My sole purpose in providing a clear format for it was to highlight that it's not only about quantity of experience, but quality and variety. You need experience before you can offer marital advice - but everyone's situations are unique, and different people will have more relevant experience for each situation that comes along. For instance, some have been through divorce, some have avoided it - both perspectives and experiences are highly valuable for someone seeking advice on a marriage that is trending towards divorce.

So if people are going to compare scores, as humans do, using a more detailed metric allows us to actually see this variety and turn it from a pissing competition into something slightly useful - where we see who we respect as having experience and make sure we pay attention to when they are talking about marriage.
 
Until death do you part.

That's what matters here. There are people who get divorced after fifty years, does that mean they were a success for forty nine of them?

Marriage is a pass/fail proposition where you only really know if you passed when you die.

Failure can occur anytime.
 
MeganC said:
Until death do you part.

That's what matters here. There are people who get divorced after fifty years, does that mean they were a success for forty nine of them?

Marriage is a pass/fail proposition where you only really know if you passed when you die.

Failure can occur anytime.
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True, but if you haven’t had any divorces, you’re succeeding so far.

People that have been together over 30 years, I would guess the divorce rate is lower than the average married couple.
 
FollowingHim said:
Well, the whole thread is in response to you showing off!

Seriously, "comparing scores" is a pointless pissing competition. My sole purpose in providing a clear format for it was to highlight that it's not only about quantity of experience, but quality and variety. You need experience before you can offer marital advice - but everyone's situations are unique, and different people will have more relevant experience for each situation that comes along. For instance, some have been through divorce, some have avoided it - both perspectives and experiences are highly valuable for someone seeking advice on a marriage that is trending towards divorce.

So if people are going to compare scores, as humans do, using a more detailed metric allows us to actually see this variety and turn it from a pissing competition into something slightly useful - where we see who we respect as having experience and make sure we pay attention to when they are talking about marriage.
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Well someone needs more whimsy in their lives.

The thread was not jut not pointless, I rather thought my introductory remarks were clear.
It was intended as a light fun but relates to
our primary fascination topic.
Hence my lampooning of the who should give advice notion. Where people are presumably still slagging each other off. Dunno, don't care honestly. My interests lie elsewhere.
Perhaps it is your not being American. My intent though was to cause the reader to imagine in their minds eye a small booth offering marriage advice ala Lucy from the Peanuts cartoon offering psychological advice for $.05. Only the price has been crossed out and bourbon has been scribbled in...in crayon.
Also the litte girl is missing and a big ugly gorilla in redneck finery is sitting behind the booth with his boots on the desk.

Point being that the more people talk about practical and utilitarian aspects of plural marriage is with a good positive and hopefully good natured whimsical fashion the better.

Can't believe I have to explain whimsy to a man who owns sheep. Would think you were bally acclimated by real world experience.
 
MeganC said:
Until death do you part.

That's what matters here. There are people who get divorced after fifty years, does that mean they were a success for forty nine of them?

Marriage is a pass/fail proposition where you only really know if you passed when you die.

Failure can occur anytime.
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Failure qua failure is....well, it is difficult to quantify.
I am revising my number up by the way based upon the entirely too serious FollowingHim criteria. I am at 50 now so presume you can see me looking smug about the fact that i have been married nearly as long as I have been alive. Next shot off the mark and I will soon eclipse my own lifespan by decades. Decades I say....
Anyway, in re failure.
I had a marriage end at seven and a half years. Managed to beet the average on broken mono marriages by a skosh and am left with loads of good memories as well as some other memories. Most importantly I have a wonderful son and have not had my enthusiasm for plural marriage so much as dented.
I still feel confident that it is not just a viable alternative to monogamy but in many cases vastly preferable. That those who have been inculcated by the childish anti plig-life blather since those bally Johnny-come-lately Roman's ant the lumpjeads which fell in line...well, it is not my fault they can't think in straight lines.
The advantages are legion and should be obvious to anyone who can be bothered to dust the cobwebs put of their brainpan.

Anyway...some marriages end. Just the way it goes. Is it failure?
Not blaming anyone else by any means but I know I did not fail and that having been put in a tough situation, I learned a lot.
Now...who is on deck for a whimsical prepper loon type?
Come come now...make sure to form an orderly queue. No pushing please. There is enough silly bastard to go around
 
frederick said:
Bring back Lucy! 🥰
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Pfffft!
You want squeeze time and overtly mean advice, you go with the little girl.

You want time by the campfire, adult libations and a no shit advice aimed designed to get to a solution with only mild(ish) bullying...you go with the ugly gorilla.

Tastes vary but there is one clear choice. And he can be found in double-h boots making wry commentary and comping on a cigar.

Accept no 9/10 year old little girl substitutes
 
paterfamilias said:
Well someone needs more whimsy in their lives.

The thread was not jut not pointless, I rather thought my introductory remarks were clear.
It was intended as a light fun but relates to
our primary fascination topic.
Hence my lampooning of the who should give advice notion. Where people are presumably still slagging each other off. Dunno, don't care honestly. My interests lie elsewhere.
Perhaps it is your not being American. My intent though was to cause the reader to imagine in their minds eye a small booth offering marriage advice ala Lucy from the Peanuts cartoon offering psychological advice for $.05. Only the price has been crossed out and bourbon has been scribbled in...in crayon.
Also the litte girl is missing and a big ugly gorilla in redneck finery is sitting behind the booth with his boots on the desk.

Point being that the more people talk about practical and utilitarian aspects of plural marriage is with a good positive and hopefully good natured whimsical fashion the better.

Can't believe I have to explain whimsy to a man who owns sheep. Would think you were bally acclimated by real world experience.
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Everything before I said the word "seriously" was equally non-serious and jocular. Reading it again noting that you'll find we are thinking basically the same.
This is the problem with text, we can't see each other's faces.
 
frederick said:
I will give you wise counsel, Grasshopper... . Never go with the ugly gorilla, or you too may become ugly.
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No no no... if you want to look good, you go out with a few fug-o's
Pretty sure that this is a background theme in a bevy of 80's movies
 
FollowingHim said:
Everything before I said the word "seriously" was equally non-serious and jocular. Reading it again noting that you'll find we are thinking basically the same.
This is the problem with text, we can't see each other's faces.
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Ah. Good
Agree
 
MeganC said:
Until death do you part.

That's what matters here. There are people who get divorced after fifty years, does that mean they were a success for forty nine of them?

Marriage is a pass/fail proposition where you only really know if you passed when you die.

Failure can occur anytime.
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Uh, let's count girlfriends too! I have had a girlfriend since kindergarten when I asked Tony to marry me.
 
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