• Biblical Families is not a dating website. It is a forum to discuss issues relating to marriage and the Bible, and to offer guidance and support, not to find a wife. Click here for more information.

Prayer request Turmoil Ahead

NickF

NickF

Seasoned Member
Real Person
Male
Catie and I are asking for prayers this week and next, basically all this month. We are being forced into a position where we must discuss our beliefs with her parents, and siblings, and some close church friends and family. Added to this we are most likely leaving our church family this week and it's taking a big toll on us mentally and emotionally.

My thanks to the brothers on here helping to distract me from the serious stuff with lively debate, you win for now. But I will return!

I have a few friends I may lose over this stand for truth, and Catie may lose friends as well. We pray God will give them all hearts that are soft and gentle, as well as ears to hear and a desire to honor God above mankind. We are leaning on each other through this but it's not been an easy couple months.

We thank God daily for your friendship, support and prayers.

Nick and Catie
 
You got it, and remember: you can't lose friends by sharing what is on your heart with them. It may seem trite to say, but they weren't your friends if they reject you over this or attempt to punish you in any way; they were just non-friends waiting to be identified. I know that doesn't prevent pain or mourning over the loss of close companions, but Yah always seems to open other doors when cowards jump out of one's windows.

I also pray that you keep everything in perspective. Yah has your back, even if it means being put through a meat grinder; trust Him rather than worry -- and thank Him that He has blessed you with a wife who also has your back. Rest easy in both of those things. Witness your faith and your biblical understanding by just being the example of how patriarchy blesses you and your family.
 
NickF said:
Catie and I are asking for prayers this week and next, basically all this month. We are being forced into a position where we must discuss our beliefs with her parents, and siblings, and some close church friends and family. Added to this we are most likely leaving our church family this week and it's taking a big toll on us mentally and emotionally.
Click to expand...

I lost all of my friends from before when I chose this life. It is definitely not an easy decision and the world makes it as hard as they can on us to choose this. But the rewards can be so amazing and someday I promise you will look back on whatever obstacles have been put in your way and you will say to yourself that it was totally worth it!
 
The Revolting Man said:
You don’t owe anyone an explanation. You don’t owe anyone a fight. It’s none of their damn business. You don’t have to discuss this if you don’t want to. I wouldn’t. There’s no need and there’s no point. You can’t change their minds.
Click to expand...
I appreciate the sentiment, and mostly agree with you. But this is a calculated move on my part, and one I've thought long and hard over. It may be the wrong one given time and distance from the decision. But if there is any chance of maintaining relationships I will do what I can to do so. I owe my family at least that much consideration.

Won't be fighting about it, just showing scripture, and letting the chips fall where they may. I don't expect to change any minds.
 
Last edited:
Family are the worst to deal with as they seem to want to destroy relationships/marriage the most. My heart goes out to you but know this, the rewards will be worth standing up for the Truth.

Others have faced the battle and been victorious.
NickF said:
Won't be fighting about it, just showing scripture, and letting the chips fall where they may. I don't expect to change any minds.
Click to expand...
Keep the focus on what is written. God's Word is living and powerful. Shalom
 
I honor your bravery. May Yah blanket you with confidence in both the present and the future.
 
Praying for you guys. Most here have walked through that fire... it will certainly be an intense but purifying heat.
 
MeganC said:
I lost all of my friends from before when I chose this life. It is definitely not an easy decision and the world makes it as hard as they can on us to choose this. But the rewards can be so amazing and someday I promise you will look back on whatever obstacles have been put in your way and you will say to yourself that it was totally worth it!
Click to expand...
This is something I hope for (not the losing friends part but it's already happening, comes with the territory) but the part where we look back and say "Totally worth it!"



NickF said:
I have a few friends I may lose over this stand for truth, and Catie may lose friends as well.
Click to expand...


Every time a relationship is broken because of God's truth I always think about Mark 10:29-31 Jesus said, “Truly, I say to you, there is no one who has left house or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or lands, for my sake and for the gospel, 30 who will not receive a hundredfold now in this time, houses and brothers and sisters and mothers and children and lands, with persecutions, and in the age to come eternal life. 31 But many who are first will be last, and the last first.”

Will be praying for you guys, as someone who has and is going through something similar, I feel for you both. Praying for peace what ever the out come is for you guys and praying for soft hearts for them too.
 
Last edited:
Praying for you also. We've been through very similar ourselves. It's a rough road, but there is light on the other side, and relationships can heal.

Our children are now in a youth group at the church we were kicked out of years ago, and I am now on the roster of people who teach the children scripture at that youth group. We went through a difficult time - but much healing has occurred over the years with many individuals who were involved in that. People get all self-righteous about this and take a hard-line stand, and we rightly respond by taking just as firm a stand for the truth, leading to painful clashes. But time does soften those wounds, and the key people who are true friends do remember that in time even if for a season they made a big deal out of something they should not have.

One word of advice: If you are called to any official meeting where you may be subject to church discipline, either take a witness or record it with a dictaphone. As I did neither, from the day following the meeting where this happened to me, there were two quite different accounts of it floating around the church - mine and the account of the church leadership. Make sure there is a record of this, so people cannot claim not to have said things that they did say - and so that you do not, through emotion, misinterpret things either. This would prove extremely valuable in our situation.
 
FollowingHim said:
One word of advice: If you are called to any official meeting where you may be subject to church discipline, either take a witness or record it with a dictaphone. As I did neither, from the day following the meeting where this happened to me, there were two quite different accounts of it floating around the church - mine and the account of the church leadership. Make sure there is a record of this, so people cannot claim not to have said things that they did say - and so that you do not, through emotion, misinterpret things either. This would prove extremely valuable in our situation.
Click to expand...
I'll second what @FollowingHim has said above. And take particular care to ensure other women don't get opportunity to have time alone with your wife to turn your wife against you. Perhaps you can encourage your wife to record any "meetings" she has with women who bump into her at the supermarket or whatever(?) You will be able to help her through all the emotional challenges she will face.

The attacks through lies and slander which we experienced was beyond anything imaginable so keeping records will help you a lot when dealing with people. Blessings and Shalom
 
The Revolting Man said:
You don’t owe anyone an explanation. You don’t owe anyone a fight. It’s none of their damn business. You don’t have to discuss this if you don’t want to. I wouldn’t. There’s no need and there’s no point. You can’t change their minds.
Click to expand...
I've prayed about it and taken your words to heart. I agree with you. From a simple tactics standpoint you are 100% correct. And you've changed my plans accordingly. I'm still going to discuss the topic lightly with my in-laws because I am confident they will search scripture and come to the same conclusion I have. We're meeting with them later this evening because they have been asking what's going on and will need to know why we are leaving that church. The whole marriage topic has just been the straw that broke the proverbial camel's back.

I will however refrain from giving my proofs to the pastor because he has not studied to show himself approved and is puffed up with pride. I will let God deal with him as He sees fit. I'll simply be removing our names from their membership roles. No need for a conflict, no need for contention. We will simply depart peaceably.
 
Praying for you and your family!! I agree with what was said above, protect your wife from other women. Also protect your children as there is the possibility of people calling CPS on you for holding this belief, even moreso if you practice it.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top