Wife vs. Concubine

[R.A. Harris]

In Old Testament sources there is a clear line of delineation between those who are called "wives" and those who are called "concubines." There are two clearly separate terms used to distinguish between the two ("eset" for wife and "piylegesh" for concubine), though the specifics of the distinction seemed to vary over the centuries.

Tongue-in-cheek references to the in-novel ending of Dune notwithstanding, is there an agreed-upon (and Biblically-and-Toraically-sound) definition of what the distinction actually was? And how applicable, if at all, is that distinction in modern society?

For the sake of full disclosure, I've read seven books attempting to answer both of these questions and found seven different answers.

 

[Bartato]

I think there are several threads where this is discussed. Maybe you should do a topic search on it.

 

[Bartato]

I think Hagar might have been called both a concubine and a wife. There seems to be some overlap. I think of a concubine as a wife that didn't receive a bride price. Usually they started out as maidservants.

 

[FollowingHim]

They're both wives - most of those few women who are called "concubine" in scripture are also called "wife" elsewhere, the words are used interchangeably. So a concubine is a type of wife - some wives are concubines, but not all wives are concubines.

The most useful post on the whole forum regarding the question of what makes a concubine is, in my opinion, this one:

Concubines... just a bit of mental jousting.

I have seen just how the use of that word causes beastie to go into full harrasment bite mode. Is like interactions with a demon characters in the movies. It must have spiritual overtones too. That word paints a red big bulls eye on your back. Is interesting how the adversary is activated with...

www.biblicalfamilies.org

It's a bit dense, my summary of what I took from it was as follows:

I'd like to have a rough go at translating the core point there into English and a modern context, if I may, removing all the hebrew words like ketubah, for the benefit of readers and so you can check that I've got this right.

Basically,

• a woman who enters the family with formal contractual arrangements (marriage contracts, documents denoting inheritance etc) is a "wife".
• a woman who moves in without such formal contracts (or with fewer contracts) is a "concubine"

If so, this actually aligns quite well with modern practice, and fits fairly seamlessly into a modern context. Wife = wife, concubine = de-facto partner. Roughly.

The take-away message being that we must consider both formal wives and de-facto wives to be women who are to be treated as scripture tells us to treat our women. The only real difference may be when it comes to inheritance. We are able to treat both completely equally with regards to inheritance, as Jacob did. However, if because of the particular circumstances we leave different assets to each and their children, that is allowed for also and is not condemned, because we are to treat them fairly but not necessarily equally. For instance, a wife who spent 20 years building a business with you may inherit that business along with her sons, while you may choose to not give a de-facto second wife who came in later a share in that in your will for reasons of fairness.

For our purposes, we can take a second "wife" by giving her suitable written marriage contracts (not legal marriage paperwork, but a ketubah etc). Or we can take a second woman without such formal contracts, and that's also completely acceptable - but because she had no contracts, she'd have more limited inheritance rights. That's just a practical legal fact. And scripturally, a woman without such inheritance rights would be termed a "concubine" - which is just semantics and not derogatory in any way, it's just a word describing her real situation.

 

[R.A. Harris]

They're both wives - most of those few women who are called "concubine" in scripture are also called "wife" elsewhere, the words are used interchangeably. So a concubine is a type of wife - some wives are concubines, but not all wives are concubines.

The most useful post on the whole forum regarding the question of what makes a concubine is, in my opinion, this one:

Concubines... just a bit of mental jousting.

I have seen just how the use of that word causes beastie to go into full harrasment bite mode. Is like interactions with a demon characters in the movies. It must have spiritual overtones too. That word paints a red big bulls eye on your back. Is interesting how the adversary is activated with...

www.biblicalfamilies.org

It's a bit dense, my summary of what I took from it was as follows:

This has been A LOT more helpful than trying to sift through that many pages of back and forth, and it basically lines up with the explanation in Maurice Nelson's The Monogamy Lie and Yoseph Koniuchowsy's Yisraelite Marriage Restored. It seems like the next, and pricklier, question is "what level of formality-in-contract distinguishes a wife from a concubine?"

 

[NickF]

My question is why does it matter?

 

[R.A. Harris]

A valid question, Nick. And it's one I don't honestly have a clear answer for. For some reason I've had a sense recently that I needed to seek an answer to this one. Whether that is the Most High leading me or merely my own curiosity I can't say.

 

[steve]

I will go on record as saying I believe that a different agreement exists with a concubine than does with a wife who isn’t a concubine. Also the “marriage ceremony” was probably different.

I don’t have the time nor mental capacity (mind numbing schedule) to reproduce the details at this point, but I do think the subject is important.

 

[NickF]

If it’s the Sprit leading that’s one thing. But from a practical standpoint there’s no actionable difference in this day and age. Especially if we’re discussing women who’ve not been raised in a polygynous culture and paradigm.

Treat them all as wives. The reality is they will all want to be called and treated as a wife. They will all want to be viewed as valuable. 95+% of women would feel worthless if designated a concubine. The question of concubines is one that is “practically” irrelevant for us in the USA. I say it’s an ancient cultural subset of wife that by all indications seems to be a legal and inheritance based definition difference.

 

[steve]

But from a practical standpoint there’s no actionable difference in this day and age. Especially if we’re discussing women who’ve not been raised in a polygynous culture and paradigm.

Treat them all as wives. The reality is they will all want to be called and treated as a wife. They will all want to be viewed as valuable. 95+% of women would feel worthless if designated a concubine. The question of concubines is one that is “practically” irrelevant for us in the USA. I say it’s an ancient cultural subset of wife that by all indications seems to be a legal and inheritance based definition difference.

There is quite a difference between a wife who comes into the family and says that everything that she owns now belongs to the husband, and a wife who has assets that will never belong to anyone other than herself.
That’s just one minor example.

 

[FollowingHim]

@R.A. Harris, @steve has a very different perspective on this to myself, and to save him retyping it if you use the search feature and find all comments with the keyword "concubine" written by @steve you'll see where he's coming from. For the record, I think he's wrong, but do look up his posts on the subject and consider what he has to say before coming to your own conclusions.

Also, do the same search for posts by @MeganC mentioning "concubine". Her perspective is valuable as she saw herself as a concubine for some time.

It seems like the next, and pricklier, question is "what level of formality-in-contract distinguishes a wife from a concubine?"

Before getting too caught up in this, remember that the word "wife" doesn't actually exist in Hebrew or Greek anyway, so never actually appears in scripture. Every time you read the word "wife", the original is actually "woman". We're told Sarah was Abraham's woman. And Hagar is called Abraham's woman. And, also, Hagar may once be called Abraham's concubine (though it's debatable who is actually being referred to in that verse). But even if she's called a concubine once it doesn't change the fact she was his woman also. Because she was a woman, and she was his!

So, by definition, every concubine is a wife - simply because every concubine is a woman, and a "wife" is just a woman.

This means that the distinction between a "woman" and a "concubine-woman", whatever it is, cannot be very large. So like @NickF, I really don't think it makes a practical difference, and it's probable that the line is very blurry anyway.

 

[MemeFan]

Not again this topic.

This topic is our equivalent of how many angels can sit on pin's head.

 

[frederick]

Not again this topic.

This topic is our equivalent of how many angels can sit on pin's head.

Ok.... so how many can sit on a pin's head? I didn't see your answer yet.

 

[NBTX11]

@FollowingHim so your assertion is that in modern terms, a concubine is a de-facto partner or wife? Would that be what most call a live in girlfriend that the husband intends to permanently be with?

 

[FollowingHim]

@FollowingHim so your assertion is that in modern terms, a concubine is a de-facto partner or wife? Would that be what most call a live in girlfriend that the husband intends to permanently be with?

Yes, that is my assertion. Which, incidentally, means that many of the men here have concubines.

But my other assertion is that it doesn't matter because they're still just as much a wife as any other wife, this is only a tiny little detail regarding what paperwork exists, which is simply a practical matter and not relevant to how God views the situation.

So "concubines" are, at the end of the day, rather boring.

 

[NBTX11]

Yes, that is my assertion. Which, incidentally, means that many of the men here have concubines.

But my other assertion is that it doesn't matter because they're still just as much a wife as any other wife, this is only a tiny little detail regarding what paperwork exists, which is simply a practical matter and not relevant to how God views the situation.

So "concubines" are, at the end of the day, rather boring.

In your opinion, is my second a concubine-wife. We have a verbal agreement with each other to live together as husband and wife for the rest of our lives. I proposed this arrangement to her and she accepted it. I then took her as a wife. I know it doesn’t matter, just wondered what you thought. We call each other husband and wife and live as husband and wife and she’s my wife. There’s no formal paperwork or contracts.

 

[FollowingHim]

In your opinion, is my second a concubine-wife. We have a verbal agreement with each other to live together as husband and wife for the rest of our lives. I proposed this arrangement to her and she accepted it. I then took her as a wife. I know it doesn’t matter, just wondered what you thought. We call each other husband and wife and live as husband and wife and she’s my wife. There’s no formal paperwork or contracts.

I think that if you were to describe your relationship technically in a modern court of law, you would call her your "de-facto partner", because that is the term in our culture that technically describes the legal situation. And if you were to describe that same relationship in a court of law in ancient Israel, you would call her your "concubine", because that was the term in that culture for it and technically describes the legal situation. While day-to-day in either time & place you'd just call her your "woman" or "wife", because that's what she is.

 

[The Revolting Man]

There should be a trophy for every time someone doesn’t gleefully self immolate over a favorite topic. I may have finally earned it.

 

[steve]

Let me say that I don’t want there to be any situation where a wife is not equal with another wife.
Zec has stated in the past that there are no concubines in the Bride, and since that would be the pattern, there should be no such thing amongst us. As I was contemplating that this morning, I thought of the parable of the ten virgins. Five were wise and made it through into the chamber with the bridegroom and the other five didn’t have enough of whatever the oil stood for, and didn’t have the complete experience.

For now, I am just throwing this on the table to be considered.

 

[Mark C]

Just a quick aside, since this topic has been beaten beyond mere death. (Albeit, not nearly so hideously as "Russia Invades Ukraine." )

If the term 'concubine' has become a cultural anachronism, the phrase "modern court of law" has likewise gone beyond - to a sick joke.