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At a standstill

Cindy

Cindy

Member
Female
hello ladies. I'm going to make it a point to be more involved here, but my life as a single mother and a full time nurse can be hectic. I do come in often to read posts and soak in everything I can, but I've been quiet because I've been struggling to move on. Earlier this year I ended a courtship with a famous polygamist family. When I met this family they hadn't become famous yet, but as they did I really felt things change. They desired to grow their family beyond me and that was wonderful, in fact I was SO excited about it, but the person that entered the picture shook me to my core. With respect to the family I will not go into detail, but I really felt that my concerns which I now know were 100% true were overlooked and I was made to feel like I was jealous. Jealous is one thing I am not. I have longed to have a large, loving family for 15 years. I want the work, the sacrifice, the struggle, the joy, the companionship, and the trust. I'm struggling to move forward right now because I gave everything I had and my heart still hurts. I've spoken to someone since then and it didn't go anywhere, but looking back that's a good thing. I'm just struggling ladies. I have so much to give but my heart still hurts because I don't understand how facts and legitimate concerns on my part could be turned around to make someone feel so horrible :(
 
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windblown said:
I am so sorry to hear this, Cindy! You will probably look back on this in a few and think how lucky you are. :) Keep up the good fight and finish the race. :D
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Thank you so much. I already know how lucky I am, it's just the pain of trusting someone so much and seeing how that trust was handled. It makes me nervous to consider trusting someone else again
 
That sounds painful. Sorry you have had experience the heartache, but thankfully it was before marriage.
 
One day the right man* and family will come along, and God will help restore that trust and hearts desire you have.

Haha edited to fix my typos
 
Cindy said:
I will be making more of an effort. I now have every Monday off of work until the end of the year, so I can be here for chat
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That's wonderful! I do really enjoy the chat time. Although where I am that's about time for me to be making dinner, so sometimes I miss it. I hope you enjoy it too :)
 
RainyLondonFog said:
That's wonderful! I do really enjoy the chat time. Although where I am that's about time for me to be making dinner, so sometimes I miss it. I hope you enjoy it too :)
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Hi, RainyLondonFog--just a thought because you mentioned the chat time is when you're making dinner--have you ever considered a delicious crockpot meal for the family on Monday evenings? It's a great way to serve them well but free up some precious minutes when YOU would like to have some time with the ladies. You would put the meal together in the morning or at noon, turn it on, go about your day, and be ready to serve them a steaming hot meal when it's time to eat. There's a smorgasboard of menus available online through google.
 
Cindy said:
I will be making more of an effort. I now have every Monday off of work until the end of the year, so I can be here for chat
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Hello, Cindy. I'm new on here (2 weeks ago) so haven't seen you on before. I really hope you can get in the chat tomorrow evening. It will encourage your heart just to have the good fellowship and healthy community around you. Our Yeshua is an expert at binding up the broken hearted and pouring in the Balm of Gilead. Let His arms of love surround you and allow yourself to rest in His arms! We heal best and quickest when we are resting--mentally, physically, and emotionally. :)
 
rejoicinghandmaid said:
Hi, RainyLondonFog--just a thought because you mentioned the chat time is when you're making dinner--have you ever considered a delicious crockpot meal for the family on Monday evenings? It's a great way to serve them well but free up some precious minutes when YOU would like to have some time with the ladies. You would put the meal together in the morning or at noon, turn it on, go about your day, and be ready to serve them a steaming hot meal when it's time to eat. There's a smorgasboard of menus available online through google.
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That us an awesome suggestion.
I want to make a large solar oven to use as a slow cooker for us, as our family eats too much food for any slow cooker I know of.
Sorry to Cindy for contributing to a derailed thread.
On topic I would echo so many other comments. I'm glad that you figured out your differences before marriage, and hope you find the courage to persevere because in life, what you are looking for is ALWAYS and without fail in the last place you look.;)
 
Joleneakamama said:
That us an awesome suggestion.
I want to make a large solar oven to use as a slow cooker for us, as our family eats too much food for any slow cooker I know of.
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Just curious--how big is your family? I know with our 6 children, sometimes their friends would be over, and sometimes my husband would bring home or invite someone from the church over (usually unexpectedly or w/o notice) so I always felt like I was cooking for an army. lol I always had very large pots and large bowls.

Cindy, hope you don't mind that I'm responding to the derail--I certainly don't mean any disrespect or seem to diminish your reason for creating the thread. :)
 
rejoicinghandmaid said:
Hi, RainyLondonFog--just a thought because you mentioned the chat time is when you're making dinner--have you ever considered a delicious crockpot meal for the family on Monday evenings? It's a great way to serve them well but free up some precious minutes when YOU would like to have some time with the ladies. You would put the meal together in the morning or at noon, turn it on, go about your day, and be ready to serve them a steaming hot meal when it's time to eat. There's a smorgasboard of menus available online through google.
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Thank you, I do have a Crock-Pot that I use several times a month. The problem more so is to remember to put a Crock-Pot meal on Mondays when I make the monthly meal plan. ;)
 
rejoicinghandmaid said:
Just curious--how big is your family? I know with our 6 children, sometimes their friends would be over, and sometimes my husband would bring home or invite someone from the church over (usually unexpectedly or w/o notice) so I always felt like I was cooking for an army. lol I always had very large pots and large bowls.

Cindy, hope you don't mind that I'm responding to the derail--I certainly don't mean any disrespect or seem to diminish your reason for creating the thread. :)
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I'm probably one of the most relaxed people you will ever meet. Go for it. The conversation in whatever way it comes out is wonderful
 
Hi Cindy,
We are new here so I am not familiar with your story, but I wanted to reach out to you and say my heart aches for you. I will pray for your healing. By the way, you have the most radiant smile in your profile picture. God has the most perfect plan for you and sometimes that includes pain to bring us to the better! He is such a good God. He cares about the little details. I will have to share my turtle story with you when I have the time to write more.
 
Jennifer said:
Hi Cindy,
We are new here so I am not familiar with your story, but I wanted to reach out to you and say my heart aches for you. I will pray for your healing. By the way, you have the most radiant smile in your profile picture. God has the most perfect plan for you and sometimes that includes pain to bring us to the better! He is such a good God. He cares about the little details. I will have to share my turtle story with you when I have the time to write more.
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Thank you so much for your kindness
 
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