Perilous peril?...
I can face the peril!
Perilous peril?...
It's too perilous!I can face the peril!
I’m not saying I know how to cut that fine line, I’m just saying I’ve seen the results of the free dating, the cloistered courting, the courting dad and the arranged marriages and I can unequivocally say that I’m not impressed with any of them for various reasons.
It's too perilous!
Ok, I'll try to give the possible start of an answer...Agreed. But that's my problem. Too many questions and too few answers.
Bottom line several years later, the two ‘godly’ young men who’d never had the opportunity to reveal their character had either been sleeping around and then abandoned their family or had become overwhelmed with providing for the family (read lazy) and had just left their family. The young guy with all the issues had a true heart for God and had been steadily growing more into His likeness and had become a wonderful husband.
At the point that we were talking, the pastor was very pleased with this son in law, but was still perplexed and didn’t have a lot of advice except caution and don’t try to marry them off young.
IMO his mistake was to assume that the young men actually had character, when in reality, they were still coasting off the tailwind of their parents character.
A person I know was a youthgroup leader, and started dating one of the other leaders. They then got married rather quickly when she got pregnant... That would have been very difficult and embarrassing for them to explain both to parents, the church, and the youth group. However, the end result is that they have a highly successful marriage, that has lasted when others around them have failed. And they're still very active in the church. The beginning was not what their parents would have wanted, but the result was fantastic. So as much as we don't want our kids getting into that situation, protective as we are of our daughters in particular - provided they're hanging out with the right set of friends in the first place things can still work out well. And that sort of incident can also be a great witness about how to do the right thing.
I have noticed a small group of young adults in our neck of the woods who are self determined to remain virgins til marriage, guys and girls. I havent been able to put my finger on the why behind it yet, but I do know that they seem to be from assemblies that I would have considered somewhat liberal in theology, and yet they are turning out young men and women who are not in your face about it, but are almost defiant in their stance against casual sex or premarital sex. It has truly turned my preconceived notions on its head and whenever I can, I try to find out more about the reason behind it without it turning into an interrogation. So far, I havent been very successful in getting to what I feel is the prime motive or catalyst behind this.
What Christians are doing now though essentially requires a young man to show up ready to get married before we let him find out if he wants to marry our daughters.