GRR... I am annoyed at two of our more public voices

[Michaeltreeguy]

Yesterday I was watching another YT video from a very public christian polygamist when I heard him parroting some of the thinking that I have been hearing from another of our friends that likes to parle with people.

They have been making statements that in my view water down the legitimacy of a man wanting more than one woman. The statements go something to the effect of, you should not plan to have more than one wife. Or, It has nothing to do with sexual desire, I just want to cover more women. In yesterdays "Live" the statement was made that you should NOT come into marriage saying, "I want to have four wives". And that you do not know how many God will bless you with and you should only take a wife if God tells you to take a wife. It should not be your idea but God's idea.

That statement was so OFF BASE that his wife who was with him in the "live" asked him point blank, how can a man know if it is God's idea or your own?

Here is the truth of it all. We Can have a plan. We SHOULD have a plan. And, plans can change. But to say that it should not be your idea is nuts!

How many times have we heard a young girl or a recently married young lady say that she intends to have X number of children. It is her role to have children and for her to be making plans to have X number is not something that we should scorn her for. We all know that she may end up unable to have children at all. She may end up being fertile Mertle and have more than she wanted. Each child she gets we count as a blessing from God but that does not mean that she should not plan for the number that she wants.

The EXACT same thing should be true for men. As young men still single or early into married life, if a man were to say, I plan to have 3 wives someday, that should be perfectly fine. We all know that he may never find the first woman to marry him. He may end up as an incel. That is life. But, with a plan, the likely-hood of life playing out somewhat close to the plan goes way up!

Another trend is telling men what are the legitimate reasons for wanting another wife. Saying that the only valid reason should be for covering a woman that needs covered.
Well DUH! IF you are desiring to cover a married woman that is a major issue. But a man may desire to take another wife for any of the reasons that he sees fit to marry her. Stop trying to say how other men should be thinking!


So, to our public facing friends, STOP being weak in the debate!
It is OKAY for men to have a desire and plan for more than one wife!!
Stop telling men the reasons that you find acceptable for them to desire a wife.
STOP telling people that you publicly debate that it has nothing to do with physical desire. There is nothing wrong with that being a legit reason for the desire.

And to the two I am speaking to, thank you for being in the public arena and engaging on this topic.

I agree with your points, however I would recognize that men are growing in their knowledge and understanding, and that boldness and a matter of fact, type of attitude develops overtime slowly for some quickly for others

 

[Man_in_the_Middle]

I agree with your points, however I would recognize that men are growing in their knowledge and understanding, and that boldness and a matter of fact, type of attitude develops overtime slowly for some quickly for others

Hear hear! I very much agree with this statement! I have tried to approach this without malice and in a way that could be received. There is wisdom in the council of many and thus this forum seems to be a great place to discuss it.

Shalom shalom...

 

[itsayswhatitsays]

Shalom and welcome to the forum.

While I appreciate the criticism, I find it ironic that you use a pseudonym and no picture while criticizing men who have their real names and real families in the public eye...

Oh please, Pete.
I find your videos amazingly awesome when it comes to facts, but you are still significantly beta when it comes to being a strong male without being ashamed of sexual desire.
Having a desired for frequent carnal knowledge as approved by scripture, unabashedly, and without remorse, is fine regardless if you want one wife or twenty.
Hear you are getting laid with two women, and acting like your motives are so holy.

Even men that claim to be male feminists and let women tell them what to do are trying to ultimately have sex.

That is the nature of man.

There isn't anything at all to apologize for.

Even the statement, "I am going to have three wives so I can have each of them every day, and that is my primary reason for getting three wives:" is a completely valid and moral statement.

If I am incorrect, point out where it is incorrect, but don't bring a holier than thou attitude.

 

[NBTX11]

Sexual desire is definitely one of the motives for obtaining more women. But that alone can’t be the only or even main motivation, because once you “know” her, you’re responsible for her for the rest of your life. It would behoove you to consider if it is worth it to you before you pursue sexual relations.

 

[itsayswhatitsays]

Sexual desire is definitely one of the motives for obtaining more women. But that alone can’t be the only or even main motivation, because once you “know” her, you’re responsible for her for the rest of your life. It would behoove you to consider if it is worth it to you before you pursue sexual relations.

That is all well and good.
But am I incorrect in what I have stated?

 

[NBTX11]

That is all well and good.
But am I incorrect in what I have stated?

You are correct in that sex is a factor. Not the factor but a factor. I can desire to cover a woman, protect her etc, and still want to have sex with her.

 

[itsayswhatitsays]

You are correct in that sex is a factor. Not the factor but a factor. I can desire to cover a woman, protect her etc, and still want to have sex with her.

I portend that if my only reason for wanting her was sex, that is just fine.
Also, if the only reason I want her is because I want someone to cook and clean, and I have no desire for sex with her, that is also just fine.
I get to have, or not have, any reason at all for wanting 1, 2 or 1000 wives.

 

[NBTX11]

I portend that if my only reason for wanting her was sex, that is just fine.

Ok but that would be a dumb reason to get married if you had no desire to be a husband in every other aspect.

What happens if for some reason you’re incapable of having sex anymore. Maybe either you or her become incapacitated. Maybe she requires constant care. You’re stuck with her.