At least we agree on something then!
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- Thread starter AlexaH
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So, just to get this straight & clear in my understanding...
If I accuse my spouse of kicking me out in the cold on this forum without evidence, I'm fine ...
BUT
If I show evidence where such is a lie, I'm vindictive and cruel.
If I say the right buzzwords & catchphrases on this forum , I'm fine ...
BUT
If I show evidence where such is a lie, I'm mudslinging.
FURTHER
If I give the ENTIRE conversation in unedited form, I'm "selective storytelling".
I'm sorry. When did I turn into Brett Kavanaugh?
If I accuse my spouse of kicking me out in the cold on this forum without evidence, I'm fine ...
BUT
If I show evidence where such is a lie, I'm vindictive and cruel.
If I say the right buzzwords & catchphrases on this forum , I'm fine ...
BUT
If I show evidence where such is a lie, I'm mudslinging.
FURTHER
If I give the ENTIRE conversation in unedited form, I'm "selective storytelling".
I'm sorry. When did I turn into Brett Kavanaugh?
At any point in this conversation, did you show love to her? I'm just wondering, because that is what the Bible says you're supposed to be doing as her husband.
You came on and said your side, and that's fine, understandable. But then you kept pushing it. You posted incredibly detailed private conversations you had with her without her permission. You have posted her cellphone number, her full first and last names, and her email address. You just keep pushing to explain your side.
Meanwhile, Alexa is nowhere to be seen, not at all fighting with you and trying to keep the drama to a minimum on the board.
This whole thread is ridiculous and should have been moved to private messaging about 8 pages ago IMO.
When, at any point, have you thanked anyone for the advice or help you've received on here. The fact that your wife after having not spoken to you for a month actually decided to talk with you to try to work things out should have been a bright light here. You should've been thanking people. Instead you turned around and said that it was 'only because people spoke to her' turning it into a bad thing.
This whole attitude is what's gotten you into this mess. And no, I'm not on her side, and I'm not thinking she's perfect, clearly she's not. But somewhere here there is a middle, there's a truth, and I don't think either of you have it.
You came on and said your side, and that's fine, understandable. But then you kept pushing it. You posted incredibly detailed private conversations you had with her without her permission. You have posted her cellphone number, her full first and last names, and her email address. You just keep pushing to explain your side.
Meanwhile, Alexa is nowhere to be seen, not at all fighting with you and trying to keep the drama to a minimum on the board.
This whole thread is ridiculous and should have been moved to private messaging about 8 pages ago IMO.
When, at any point, have you thanked anyone for the advice or help you've received on here. The fact that your wife after having not spoken to you for a month actually decided to talk with you to try to work things out should have been a bright light here. You should've been thanking people. Instead you turned around and said that it was 'only because people spoke to her' turning it into a bad thing.
This whole attitude is what's gotten you into this mess. And no, I'm not on her side, and I'm not thinking she's perfect, clearly she's not. But somewhere here there is a middle, there's a truth, and I don't think either of you have it.
No. It was helpful to see your evidence that she had lied.
But if you also share personal information unrelated to that evidence, such as her surname, phone number and email address, or other private details of her life that are unrelated to your main point and are not things the whole world needs to know about, that's vindictive and cruel.
No, you didn't, because you didn't share any private information about me that I have not already made public.
You're just acting like a jerk, sharing a private conversation for no reason other than to try and annoy me. Fortunately I'm used to people playing silly buggers and it doesn't phase me.
However the more you post things like this, the more people are going to be quietly thinking "I can see why she left him, I couldn't live with someone who acts so defensively whenever there is a disagreement".
Actually, I posted this here so u could see what I seeing on the PM since I couldn't post a pic there. So, I'm trying to be helpful in TechSupport, but u call it being a jerk. I see that we are far from seeing eye-to-eye on much here.
Ok, sorry I misread that one. Your sarcastic "did I dox you" comment rather led to that way of reading it though.
Posting the pixelated pic was sarcasm.
Asking if I doxed you was legit since w every other pic I post every background pixel gets throughly inspected for offending material and denounced.
Update:
Alexa:
"I will not accept your document that places me as the solely guilty party."
Me:
"I have NO authority to give u what u seek. If u want SPIRITUAL freedom, talk to God. My only authority in divorce is in the case of adultery as I thought u had done. Whether we like it or not, we're stuck w each other ... for better or for worse."
Alexa:
"No, I am not just stuck with you. In fact, I will be calling the storage unit company tommorow you have 10 days to have your possessions removed or I will take legal action including but not limited to changing locks and emptying said storage of all positions. ... I am dead serious I will make an 8 hr drive to change locks."
Fun, huh?
Alexa:
"I will not accept your document that places me as the solely guilty party."
Me:
"I have NO authority to give u what u seek. If u want SPIRITUAL freedom, talk to God. My only authority in divorce is in the case of adultery as I thought u had done. Whether we like it or not, we're stuck w each other ... for better or for worse."
Alexa:
"No, I am not just stuck with you. In fact, I will be calling the storage unit company tommorow you have 10 days to have your possessions removed or I will take legal action including but not limited to changing locks and emptying said storage of all positions. ... I am dead serious I will make an 8 hr drive to change locks."
Fun, huh?
OK, well know that we are still praying for you guys and for complete restoration. May you be guided by the fruits of the Spirit, in your future interactions. There is a lot of forgiveness that needs to take place here.
Latest episode in this drama...
Alexa contacted D, my first attempt at poly, and is spinning an intruguing tale of growing up in Spain. Little does she know that my daughter still chats w D regularly. There's no animosity there. So Alexa lived her for 15 months, but is the expert on everything about us while simultaneously staying on her phone in the bedroom whereas D was here for almost 4 years and knows "nothing".
Anybody got popcorn?
Alexa contacted D, my first attempt at poly, and is spinning an intruguing tale of growing up in Spain. Little does she know that my daughter still chats w D regularly. There's no animosity there. So Alexa lived her for 15 months, but is the expert on everything about us while simultaneously staying on her phone in the bedroom whereas D was here for almost 4 years and knows "nothing".
Anybody got popcorn?
You've made your point. What purpose does this gossip serve?
Look! I know there is lots of drama here, but it is hard to pray and eat popcorn at the same time.
Spankings, death penalty and hell are three examples of God's love for humanity. Do u question His husbandship?
I didn't come here for advice or "help". I came here to tell the truth. In an immense desire to be "helpful", the truth is not allowed to come out. Because of the unhelpful advice she's received here in PMs, the peace we once enjoyed is now shattered and continues to get worse. Please help by STOP HELPING!
By D's own standard, badmouthing to another Ex is a pretty low blow. Again, above board vs behind the back. Public vs private.
Matthew 10:27
What I tell you in the darkness, speak in the light; and what you hear whispered in your ear, proclaim upon the housetops.
It is possible that somebody is telling her anything in private, either here or in real life. However the key people here would be trying to help her marriage, not destroy it.
But this is simply you trying to shift the blame. You want to blame us for breaking up your marriage. She wants to blame you. Everyone wants to blame someone else. Neither of you is trying to find, recognise and correct your own faults. And that is, fundamentally, why you are where you are today.
That is Jesus telling His disciples to preach His word boldly. It has nothing to do with rumours. This is the relevant verse:
Proverbs 11:13
"Whoever goes about slandering reveals secrets, but he who is trustworthy in spirit keeps a thing covered."
Isn't that what I said was the EXACT problem? You think you're being helpful, but you're not.
After over a month of peace following the advice of 1Co 7:15- 16 "...let her leave; ... not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace. ..."
And then ...
So we chat again. But there is no reconcilement. There's no acknowledgement of wrongs, no repentance, just defiance.
Perhaps you have forgotten who the OFFENDED party is here.
Where would she get the idea that the idea that me signing an immoral divorce would suddenly make everything Kosher? Maybe it would be Kosher, but I don't care about rabbi approval.
Again w the malicious judgement of my actions! First you call it gossip now rumors and slander. Apparently reporting a crime is the only crime here. And still no comment on her slander which is provably false?
Eph 5:11-13
"Do not participate in the unfruitful deeds of darkness, but instead even EXPOSE THEM; for it is disgraceful even to speak of the things which are done by them in secret. But all things become visible when they are exposed by the light, for everything that becomes visible is light."
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