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Why do some women stray and others stay faithful?

Scarecrow

Scarecrow

Member
"What makes a woman happy in a relationship? The answer is just as often sex as it is spending time with their spouse."

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/41118523/ns/today-books/

"M. Gary Neuman compiles the voices of different women and explores what makes a marriage work."

If only they really knew...but I guess the age old adage "sex sells" is alive and well...
 
If only they really knew...but I guess the age old adage "sex sells" is alive and well...
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Is that book being marketed to men?

I always thought that commitment as taught in the Bible (which includes servanthood-love and respect) would be the best way to keep one's wife from looking for greener grass.

Instead, maybe I should break out the viagra...? :eek:
 
There is a lot of stuff involved in servanthood, love and respect, including meeting each others 'needs'. Like it or not, the 'needs' are there to deal with.
 
Having been one of the men who has a wife who strayed I found that I could restore my marriage by accepting My faults befor condeming hers. I was a jerk and am a recovering jerk. She was simply looking for approval not to mention unconditional Love and as a selfcentered jerk that I am I was not providing that to her. We were close to the end of a nasty divorce when she started going to a church that told her to forgive me and go back and place heself in the position of submission to her husband. At the time I had no intentions of allowing her to do so and blew it off entirly as a legal manuver. God however has a way of kicking the stuff out of me when need be and it has now been four years and I am happier with her than in the 7 preceding. I strive daily to be her servant and friend against my flesh.
 
I read the article and was moved to anger at the total fallacy of what real men are like. Are we to assume that it is the man's responsibility alone to make sure that every one at home feels good? Spend all the time with the family to make them "feel" loved, and you'll be doing it on the curb or in a homeless shelter. Granted, there are some men who are workaholics, but they are not the norm. Most men desire to spend time with the wives and children, but the constraint of making a living, providing for the family robs them of that dream.I am sick and tired of all this type of propaganda that minimizes good men. If Mom's would praise and honor their husbands with the respect God desires more men would be able to perform as God designed. Both spouses need to do their part to make a happy home.
I recognize the different "love languages", but God's program works best.
 
Oh I must have misread. I took it that plenty of women place quite a bit of importance on physical and sexual satisfaction. It didn't strike me that it was implying a man had to be home all the time to make that work. I read it to suggest that couples need to make more focused time for each other than maybe is happening in a lot of marriages. Huh, I'll re-read it.
 
John Whitten said:
If Mom's would praise and honor their husbands with the respect
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Freudian slip perhaps?

Do you not mean 'wives'??

B
 
Freudian slip perhaps?

Do you not mean 'wives'??
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I don't think so. I often look at Moms and wives synonomously. In many or most cases it gets the same effect.

It didn't strike me that it was implying a man had to be home all the time to make that work.
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Perhaps I misread it or reacted to my morning reading in Conroy's Prince of Tides. However, there have been alot of media messages that attempts to make fathers and husbands feel guilty for not providing income and massive amounts of social time as well. Such guilt further alienates the couple from each other.
 
PolyDoc said:
I always thought that commitment as taught in the Bible (which includes servanthood-love and respect) would be the best way to keep one's wife from looking for greener grass.
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I believe you're correct here, Poly Doc.
I read the article and I'm trying to keep in mind that it's just a small excerpt from a book...but I was amazed at the lack of importance the women seemed to place on "commitment". Quite frankly, I felt I was reading little more than a list of excuses why the women cheated on their husbands. I'm not discounting the importance of marital intimacy within a relationship and I do understand the desire for more quality time with a husband..."BUT" if a wife chooses to cheat (and it's definitely a CHOICE), she has made the wrong choice and she alone bears the responsibility.

Blessings,
Fairlight
 
"BUT" if a wife chooses to cheat (and it's definitely a CHOICE), she has made the wrong choice and she alone bears the responsibility
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I agree, Fairlight.

If a husband has the proper commitment as mentioned in my earlier post, and his woman also makes a proper commitment as taught in the Bible, everything else will follow. Including intimacy. (That old language problem that both Greek and Hebrew use the same word for "wife" as is used for "woman" just popped up again...)

But some men are not husband material, and some women are not marriage partner material. By that, I mean they are not willing to make any serious commitment. They might make promises that sound like commitment, but which get broken at the first hint of any problem.

A successful marriage is not one that has no problems - a successful marriage is one where the husband and his woman work through the problems, usually with the help of a lot of "knee time."
 
PolyDoc said:
But some men are not husband material, and some women are not marriage partner material. By that, I mean they are not willing to make any serious commitment. They might make promises that sound like commitment, but which get broken at the first hint of any problem.
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Very true!

PolyDoc said:
a successful marriage is one where the husband and his woman work through the problems, usually with the help of a lot of "knee time."
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Amen! :)

Blessings,
Fairlight
 
True, True. I took the article to be pointing out that a lot of people think women don't care about physical intimacy but in fact it has huge impact on one's sense of happiness, well being and satisfaction. I wasn't thinking it was making a point about anything else.
 
"it has huge impact on one's sense of happiness"

Not being a woman I can only venture a guess...but I would think that a woman would also feel loved, wanted, and desired as part of that "sense of happiness" when her husband makes love to her...
 
Scarecrow, the shirt and tie is back! The woman has been given her marching orders. Have you considered adding a 'marriage' plate somewhere? ylop
 
ylop said:
Scarecrow, the shirt and tie is back! The woman has been given her marching orders. Have you considered adding a 'marriage' plate somewhere? ylop
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I can't help it, I just cracked up laughing..... :lol:
 
"Have you considered adding a 'marriage' plate somewhere?"

Well since my "bumper" isn't visible on this particular picture there was really no place to attach it...quite honestly I had no idea you were so interested in seeing my butt...if there is enough demand I guess I could have a picture taken and add a plate to my bumper...just for you... ; )
 
There...how is that?

Any interest in continuing the discussion at hand?
 
"And yet Sir Bumbleberry gets criticized. "

I agree...and I tried to get back on topic rather than going on and on for pages...but then a couple of others had to also leave their unneeded and unnecessary comments...I guess there is little hope for a topic once people decide it is more important to leave worthless comments all over the place than participate in a discussion about the topic... ::sigh::
 
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