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Poly Family Interviewed

@Jennifer, I am very sorry about what happened to you, and any distress related to my post. Please let me assure you, I had not read your earlier posts, and that no part of my post above was at all directed at you. What little I then-knew of your situation was nowhere near my thoughts when I composed that message.

The last paragraph was directed at #MeToo. It was something that occurred to me after I had written the rest of the message. Other than the comment about #MeToo, the only purpose was to add to what was said earlier regarding Exo 22:16-17.

Regarding your questions for me, I am uncertain if it is appropriate for me to comment here about any matters of jurisprudence as it relates to your situation. I'm sorry. :(
I am actually pretty far into my healing so your post did not hurt or offend me.
 
@Jennifer, I want to say very sincerely how much I admire your grace and character. I think you're handling this better than I am. Today as I drove home from school this very thread was on my heart because I know there will be other women and girls who visit the site and utimately will encounter our testimonies. My heart aches that they will see how this subject of abuse has been handled by this BF family. Never in my wildest dreams would I have seen this thread going to the depths or direction it has when I started it a week ago Thursday night. At this point, the thread has been totally derailed. Nevertheless, there's a reason all of this has happened the way it has. So we'll see where it goes from here.

Some of the posts by certain people are so blatantly calloused, cold-hearted, and demeaning, I struggle to understand their continued and adamant assertion that they are patriarchial men, deserving of all homage and reverence. They blast, slam, and decry the feminazies, as do I and you and @Patricia. But when 3 women from this family in BF quite innocently and openly have shared real life personal abuse and trama with no hidden agenda, those men have mocked, ignored, and downplayed the facts. When they were faced with real hurt, they looked the other way and decided that wrangling over $$$ should decide how that violated girl/daughter/woman should be treated by the rest of society, family, and pervert! God help us!!

I want to say a special thank you to the men who stepped forward with sound reasoning and questions confronting the naysayers.
 
Please help me understand what you're saying here.
Hashtag (#) MeToo is a movement that attempts to encourage other victims to come out about their attackers.

I’m not sure how legitimate the claims are and frankly I’m a bit skeptical of some of them. I just find it hilarious that this movement utilizes a symbol that for years has been known as the pound (lb) sign. In other words, Pound MeToo.
 
#MeToo is basically trial by media. The epitome of 'believe all women' and their desire to eliminate any rights or protections of justice that get in the way of their power.

It's presented as being about justice for victims, but they don't really care about justice.
 
@rejoicinghandmaid,
It was me, I started it with the last paragraph of my post http://www.biblicalfamilies.org/forum/threads/poly-family-interviewed.14562/page-4#post-177623

My remark there was an allusion to #MeToo, and Jennifer replied (http://www.biblicalfamilies.org/forum/threads/poly-family-interviewed.14562/page-4#post-177627) to that post, expressing what I took as displeasure at my remarks, and after reading her message, I perceived that she might have thought I was taking a swipe at her, which I was not, but instead commenting on #MeToo. In my second message (http://www.biblicalfamilies.org/forum/threads/poly-family-interviewed.14562/page-4#post-177654) replying to her reply to my first message, I elucidated that point, and that was the first place in the thread that #MeToo appeared; me explaining the meaning of what I wrote in my first post.

For what it's worth, I'm sorry for contributing to the derailment of your thread.
 
@Jennifer, I want to say very sincerely how much I admire your grace and character. I think you're handling this better than I am. Today as I drove home from school this very thread was on my heart because I know there will be other women and girls who visit the site and ultimately will encounter our testimonies. My heart aches that they will see how this subject of abuse has been handled by this BF family. Never in my wildest dreams would I have seen this thread going to the depths or direction it has when I started it a week ago Thursday night. At this point, the thread has been totally derailed. Nevertheless, there's a reason all of this has happened the way it has. So we'll see where it goes from here.

Some of the posts by certain people are so blatantly calloused, cold-hearted, and demeaning, I struggle to understand their continued and adamant assertion that they are patriarchial men, deserving of all homage and reverence. They blast, slam, and decry the feminazies, as do I and you and @Patricia. But when 3 women from this family in BF quite innocently and openly have shared real life personal abuse and trama with no hidden agenda, those men have mocked, ignored, and downplayed the facts. When they were faced with real hurt, they looked the other way and decided that wrangling over $$$ should decide how that violated girl/daughter/woman should be treated by the rest of society, family, and pervert! God help us!!

I want to say a special thank you to the men who stepped forward with sound reasoning and questions confronting the naysayers.

When an individual responds to theological, statistical, or economic questions with anecdotal personal tales of woe and trauma; they are dropping the emotional equivalent of a thermonuclear bombshell. At best they are emotionally reacting out of past trauma. At worst, they are emotionally manipulating the discussion and are anything but "innocent" with "no hidden agenda".

In either case, there is no response in defense of God's law that will not escalate the situation and cause more hurt feelings to one who has already experienced enough trauma. So I choose not to engage them. That this bothers you says more about you than anyone else.

I choose to accept the will of God regardless of how I feel about it. I will not be swayed by the cares of the world. The law of God is just, true, righteous, and perfect. Even when I find it offensive. No, especially when I find it offensive.

When a person says "And could you possibly explain to me WHY a woman would ever want to be shakled to her rapist?!?". They are not asking a logical question of understanding. They are making a rhetorical statement. To answer such an emotional question sets up the questioners emotions as the arbiter of the law of God. For that person to accept a different point of view requires one to give an answer that makes them feel good about that emotional conclusion and, spoiler warning, there is no response that will do that.

But if you (or anyone else) do indeed want understanding, confess to God on your knees that, even though you find it extremely offensive, His law is just, and ask for Him to grant you understanding and healing. If you can do that, and these verses are a challenge to your faith such that you feel you must wrestle with them, message me privately and I will help.
 
At worst, they are emotionally manipulating the discussion and are anything but "innocent" with "no hidden agenda".
Ok, no hidden agenda. There is ‘No Way’ on God’s green earth my daughters will ever marry their rapist. I would never allow it. In addition, there are additional stipulations regarding that scripture.

I have said this in other posts, sin or no sin, I would not force my daughter to live under such a volital situation. I would however, make sure the offender is behind bars.

This may be offensive to you, but I’m no longer a young man trying to find his way in life. Am I cherry picking? I don’t believe I am, but if I am I stand behind what I say. I have been tested in the past and have a strong protective side to me. I have in the past and will in the future protect those I love. Heck, I didn’t like the previous administration, but when Biden showed up in the Washington LZ in Baghdad, I would have taken a bullet for him. Right and wrong never change. And just because you may not agree with someone, does not change these facts.

And how much more valuable are our daughters? As I said, sin or not, I would not allow them to marry their rapist. Period!
 
This gives a more comprehensive understanding of the passage and how it actually worked in real life.

https://www.chabad.org/parshah/arti...ewish/Does-the-Torah-Punish-a-Rape-Victim.htm

And so to push this even further, it appears that sex did not create the marriage in this case. But if the idea that it did, would she be able to marry someone else after the rape producing marriage, or remarry for those who believe she is married now after sex/rape but did not choose to marry?
 
This gives a more comprehensive understanding of the passage and how it actually worked in real life.

https://www.chabad.org/parshah/arti...ewish/Does-the-Torah-Punish-a-Rape-Victim.htm

That is an attractive interpretation, unfortunately it requires reading into the passage the woman's consent. It references this interpretation as being from the Talmud. Does anyone know where in the Talmud this is from or where this verse is discussed?

I see in the Hebrew an alternate understanding that would historically make sense, but can't confirm it. I'm wondering how the Talmud guys viewed this passage.
 
I thought it gave references in that one. I read several, some of which were presented by self proclaimed feminists IMO this does not discredit the passages, it just means that maybe they’ve done a little more homework in this area than others.

I did a google search for rape in Jewish Law or something like that.
 
In addition to forcing the man to provide for her (food, clothing, shelter, and children who will receive an inheritence) without the ability to divorce, this law also provides an incentive to betroth daughters at an early age. Because elsewhere in the chapter, if a betrothed woman is raped, and cries out for help (or is in a place where such a cry would not be heard) then only the rapist is killed.
 
My great grandfather was in his early 20s when he met my great grandmother. She was 15 at the time. He respectfully requested to court her. Did so with the fathers permission for about a year.
Then came the request for her hand in marriage. Then the father walks her down the isle and power is stranferred.
Happily married life long. :)
Great gramps died at age 98, and grams several years later passed in her early 90s.
Same here. But my great gramps was mid 20s when great gramma was 15.
 
Same with my in-laws, may they rest in peace. Different times back then apparently.

Less crazy times.

Quite a few of my ancestors of prior generations had >10 year age differences. All resulted in lifetime loving relationships.
 
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