Some feminist non-Christian women, yes, I've heard that from them, but I'd expect nothing less from their mouths. But the type of women I speak with, no.
Maybe I'm just sheltered.
The lack of empathy here for the men's perspective and men's needs isn't helping your case any.
In America, for all practical purposes, there is little difference between feminist and non-feminists, Christian and non-Christian women. If anything, the Christian women are worse because they attribute their feelings to God and have a church undermining their husbands at every turn. Even the very best of women out of homeschooling subcultures will still struggle with these things because feminism is the cultural air we breathe church culture is feminist even when it purports to be against it. There are Christian councilors openly advocating women to engage in outright abusive behavior in order to control their husbands and the advice to men who are struggling with dead bedrooms plays directly into women controlling them through sex.
Christian women are also more likely to cloak it not in terms of righteousness instead of control. It's not loving to expect me to have sex when I'm tired. It's sinful for me to do sex that way. I shouldn't reward a sinful husband with sex. It's wrong for me to have sex with my husband until he quits porn. Sex is dirty. Sex except for procreation is wrong. I'm not feeling like sex because he's not loving me right or he's not righteous enough. It's wrong to expect me to have sex when I'm not feeling it, he's unloving if he doesn't help out more so I feel like it. But it's still all really about control.
Has your wife gotten 3 hours of sleep in the last 24 cause the baby won't sleep? Ya, its best not to keep her up for sex. But that's his judgement call. And that's not what leads to deadbedrooms, that's not how this plays out in real life, that's not the situation when most men hear "I'm too tired". It's insulting to men to suggest that it is.
When people suggest it's wrong for men to ask their tired wives for sex, that such men are selfish, you're handing the keys to the castle over to women, contradicting 1 Cor 7 and making men mere figureheads in marriage. When you give wives justification to put men off 'because tired' they'll run with that in all manner of situations out of keeping with actual fatigue. The sob stories about situations when she really is too tired are mere veneer on handing control of sex over to women.
knowing that this is only a stage of a life and not a permanent situation in their marriage.
"This stage" like what, while you nurse the kid for 12 months? Depriving a husband of sex for a 'stage in life' sets a pattern for the rest of marriage. Furthermore, it will never end. First it's the nursing baby, then its the sick kid, then it's the next baby, then its the PTA meeting, then its being a soccer mom, then its 'well we just grew apart I don't know what happened'. Either you value your husband enough to keep him sexually satisfied (even when you're tired) or you don't. Either you trust your husband to make that judgement call or he's not your head.
No Christian will excuse men for not fulfilling their responsibilities because they "don't feel like it" or "they're too tired". But with women it's different? Hello pedestal!