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Biblical or not

FollowingHim said:
Or as Terry Pratchett put it in one of his many novels, you should choose a wife based on her cooking ability, not her looks. Because looks will only deteriorate, while cooking will only get better. :)
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I once had a very old widow tell me, “find a girl who can cook, because it’s the cooking, not the kissing that lasts”. Although I plan on making the kissing last too :D
 
Asforme&myhouse said:
I once had a very old widow tell me, “find a girl who can cook, because it’s the cooking, not the kissing that lasts”. Although I plan on making the kissing last too :D
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I wasn’t even looking for girl that can cook and my wife showed up. The woman can cook like a top chef, she’s beautiful and good at kissing.... dang, God is good.
I think finding someone attractive is important because I don’t think God would make a helpmeet for me I wasn’t attracted to, it just seems like if they were created to be mine I would find them attractive. It would be a shame to marry someone that you didn’t find attractive and they could of married someone else that found them smoking hot....
 
As long as she can boil water without burning it.

I mean, hey, that advice was to monogamists.
 
There is a saying: when looking for a wife you can expect her to excel at only 2 of the 3: cooking, cleaning or sex.

Although I've too often seen women who fail at all 2 or even all 3.
 
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Asforme&myhouse said:
Truthfully all you really need is a woman who is as dedicated to staying together as you are... the rest can be figured out along the way ;)
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I hope you like burnt food.
 
I know a good man who almost wasted his life on a woman who could cook good food. It was devastating to watch the relationship unfold. She was a very pretty gal, behind his back was another story. It’s frustrating to see families train their girls to be pretty and won’t honor their father, work hard, or keep their mouths shut when necessary. They basically teach these girls ‘be pretty now so you can get that man,’ worry about being a Proverbs woman later. Then when she can’t or won’t be that Proverbs woman men want to blame it on a rebellious spirit, when in fact he was blinded by her outward beauty and never considered her character. Poor fellow that gets the girl that won’t honor/obey her husband but can make food tasty. It’ll end up tasting like gravel in his mouth.
Just an observation- anything burnt tastes a little better with BBQ sauce or a bit of Ranch:D
So, I’ve been told...
 
Man@Home said:
How do you know that so certainly? :eek:
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I don't, it's a saying. I've seen it play out in real life sometimes, but I'm not yet certain how reliable a metric it is. But with polygamy, you can certainly cheat it.

Or do you mean women failing all 3? Well when the subject of conversation is the man seeking help with his deadbedroom, among other things. Besides, when you get to know a family, you quickly find out about the cooking and cleaning and one can often perceive the 3rd by watching their dynamic and really listening to them. Men/women will often make comments that give away their satisfaction with the sexual dynamic and what the balance of power is between them.
 
David D said:
I think finding someone attractive is important because I don’t think God would make a helpmeet for me I wasn’t attracted to, it just seems like if they were created to be mine I would find them attractive.
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Ever seen "Shallow Hal"?
If a man can't look past the skin and actually see the person under that skin, then perhaps "she" is looking at an ugly man that just looks good.
When it comes to a "smoking hot" woman,,, I think my dad expressed it well, when I was only a lad, he said "when it comes to sex, just remember that you still have twenty three hours and fifty nine minutes left in ever day that you still have to get through, look at the person not the body."
 
Aussies said:
Ever seen "Shallow Hal"?
If a man can't look past the skin and actually see the person under that skin, then perhaps "she" is looking at an ugly man that just looks good.
When it comes to a "smoking hot" woman,,, I think my dad expressed it well, when I was only a lad, he said "when it comes to sex, just remember that you still have twenty three hours and fifty nine minutes left in ever day that you still have to get through, look at the person not the body."
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That’s epic!
 
Aussies said:
twenty three hours and fifty nine minutes
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Speak for yourself on that one.

Aussies said:
look at the person not the body
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False dichotmy. It's both and. You also need to look at character and chemistry; there are dangerous, but hot women out there you should take a pass on. But looks matter too and it is healthy and good to seek out someone who is attractive to you, whom you will be sexually satisfied with.

One of the contributing factors to the divorce epidemic is people waiting too long to start looking for a mate, forcing them to settle with someone they're not really attracted to and can't stick it out with for the long haul.

Unless of course you think 1 minute sex sessions are just fine; I have higher expectations than that.
 
rockfox said:
Speak for yourself on that one.



False dichotmy. It's both and. You also need to look at character and chemistry; there are dangerous, but hot women out there you should take a pass on. But looks matter too and it is healthy and good to seek out someone who is attractive to you, whom you will be sexually satisfied with.

One of the contributing factors to the divorce epidemic is people waiting too long to start looking for a mate, forcing them to settle with someone they're not really attracted to and can't stick it out with for the long haul.

Unless of course you think 1 minute sex sessions are just fine; I have higher expectations than that.
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High expectations? I think you’re better off going in with low expectations lol.
 
rockfox said:
But looks matter too and it is healthy and good to seek out someone who is attractive to you, whom you will be sexually satisfied with.
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It is true that it is pleasing to be with an attractive person, but if that is so important then, how does a blind man get on? Does that mean that he can never find true love? When Issac took Rebekah he had never seen her before, but he grew to love her and as far as we know never took another.
rockfox said:
One of the contributing factors to the divorce epidemic is people waiting too long to start looking for a mate, forcing them to settle with someone they're not really attracted to and can't stick it out with for the long haul.
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I totally disagree!
The divorce epidemic is more likely due to the fact that the smoking hot wife, just got a little old and wrinkly, and thus was not so smoking hot anymore. But there is always another generation of hot ladies coming through. So the hubby now looks at what hes got and what he could have and bingo, we got another divorce. Loyalty is more important than looks. If through no fault of your own you got caught in a fire and you lost your pretty face, and were covered in burns and scars, would you expect your wife to now "settle" , or would you hope that she would love the man not the picture of what you used to be.
I believe that Jesus said it well at Matthew 19:9.
When it comes to "Settling"I have herd the argument put in a similar way but referring to a wife "settling" for a poly marriage because she could not find a single man. That to is rubbish.
 
rockfox said:
Speak for yourself on that one.
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That’s an average, it would work out to a pleasant half hour once a month for his dad. ;)
 
Aussies said:
but if that is so important then,
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I know it is important, God designed us this way. Does not nature teach you...

Aussies said:
how does a blind man get on
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By smell and touch. Trust me, he can tell. Do you not realize that many people have sex in the dark? Some even with blindfolds on as it heightens the sensations? And some of a man's perception of the hotness of a woman is the subconscious registering of her hormone profile; you can smell them, but you don't consciously realize it.

Not only is finding an attractive woman biologically synonymous with finding a healthy mate, there is some indication people find good genetically compatible matches more attractive. (More here and here.)

steve said:
That’s an average, it would work out to a pleasant half hour once a month for his dad. ;)
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Ya, that's classic drip fed sex. Not healthy.

Aussies said:
The divorce epidemic is more likely due to the fact that the smoking hot wife, just got a little old and wrinkly, and thus was not so smoking hot anymore. But there is always another generation of hot ladies coming through. So the hubby now looks at what hes got and what he could have and bingo, we got another divorce. Loyalty is more important than looks. If through no fault of your own you got caught in a fire and you lost your pretty face, and were covered in burns and scars, would you expect your wife to now "settle" , or would you hope that she would love the man not the picture of what you used to be.
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I couldn't disagree more. That's the classic blame man perspective. The wife goggles specifically mediate against that problem in men. The supermajority of divorces are filed by women. Many of these are women who 'love you but don't love you', 'grown apart', 'not happy', bored, etc.; basically women who aren't attracted to hubby anymore.
 
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