I’m just gonna like that Keith! I still think we’re all closer in perspective than we are apart. We’re all just approaching it from different angles.
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Churchianity Lacks PRACTICAL Answers For Single Women!
- Thread starter Frank S
- Start date
With all due respect, you being a younger sister in Christ (I assume you are a Christian), I'm not the one who puts the blame on the father, our Heavenly Father is the One who says a father can and does cause his daughter to commit fornication if he doesn't protect with accountability and rules of his household under his own roof. Please study Numbers 30 and read the scriptural quotes below. According to the Bible, a woman is supposed to be either under her father's (or closest male relative) or husband's roof and authority. It's normally assumed she is promiscuous if she is not, although there may be few exceptions like the case of a wealthy widow. If a woman was divorced without cause, she usually returned to her father's house hoping for reconciliation with her husband.
If a virgin daughter runs away from her father's house, or is forced out because she rebels against her father, that's not his fault, it's the fault of the rebellious daughter, but in today's situation where fathers are supporting, encouraging and sometimes FORCING, pressuring, or bribing a daughter to go to college, he is CAUSING her to be in a situation where she may be pressured, seduced, or raped. I had no biological father to guide me, and I did go on to college. In my case, I was seduced into giving up my virginity. On at least one occasion I claimed a boyfriend to protect me because another guy manhandled me and threatened me in between classes. I didn't have a father or older brother at school to protect me, so my natural reaction, not walking with Christ yet, I looked to a more gentle guy who expected something from me to protect me from another guy. I broke it off when I realized this, but I now understand dating is like prostitution. Young women go on dates expecting to be wined and dined and treated like a princess, maybe or maybe not hoping for an offer of marriage eventually, and the man is wining and dining, nowadays. let's admit it, usually hoping for a sexual exchange, which may or may not lead to an offer of marriage. If I had a Biblical father or some other male relative to protect me and guide me growing up and going into womanhood, this would not have been an issue.
Do not prostitute your daughter, to CAUSE her to be a harlot, lest the land fall into harlotry, and the land become full of wickedness. Leviticus 19:29 (Emphasis mine)
I know this isn't popular to point out these days, but Our Heavenly Father not only says it's possible for a father to "cause" his daughter to be sexually immoral, and He forbids it, but He also says husbands who divorce their wives are responsible for "causing" their divorced wives to become adulteresses:
...but I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality CAUSES her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery. Matthew :32
Whenever a man causes a woman to leave the protection of his house, whether that woman is his daughter or wife, he CAUSES her to commit sexual immorality, whether he realizes it or not. You see, the Father in Heaven knows there is sexual sin in this world, and that is one of many reasons why He came up with the idea of marriage. He knows women are vulnerable in this world, and he gave virgin daughters fathers to protect them from the lusts of men and their own lusts.
If a virgin wants to marry because of sexual desires or because she wants to marry and have children, her father gives her away in marriage. The virgin goes from man who protects her to another. She is not intended to go outside of that umbrella of protection. If a married woman has sexual desires, that's what her husband is for. The only reason for divorce is sexual immorality, and the sexual immorality spoken of is a woman found not to be a virgin while engaged, because, as in the case of Mary, the mother of Jesus, she's pregnant, and so her husband, or fiance, considers divorce. Everyone reading this, please see Luke 1 before you argue with me. Study the scriptures before you get diarrhea of the mouth. Like Proverbs says, don't be the fool that answers quickly before listening and considering. Joseph and Mary were engaged, not married, and they had not had sex yet. She was pregnant, so Joseph questioned her faithfulness to him and their vow/covenant/promise/agreement to be wed. He gave her the benefit of doubt, he thought her to be a chaste woman, or else he would not have proposed marriage as one is not to be unequally yoked. Maybe he figured she could have been raped, but regardless, the Bible says that because he was a just man, he thought to put her away secretly rather than make a public example of her. It was not because he was not compassionate that he considered divorcing her, hence the reason he was considering so thoughtfully what to do. Thankfully, the angel appeared to Joseph and revealed the cause of her pregnancy and her chastity to her husband.
Now, if a woman is found to not be a virgin while living in her father's house, it's also on the father, because he either did not lay down rules and enforce them, or failed to protect her. This is why a woman is brought to her father's door step and stoned in some cases of sexual immorality. It brings the responsibility back on the father. It's a reminder to fathers that if their daughter is not raised up in the way she should go, it comes back on the father, too. The daughter dies for her own sin, but the father loses out, too. Not only is the daughter that he was supposed to love killed in the flesh before his eyes, on the father's door step, but this was a reminder to the father that her salvation was lost, and that he did have a part in that. The physical teaches us the spiritual. Raising children is also about saving souls and presenting a picture of how we, daughters of Yah, should look to the protection of our Heavenly Father and stay in His house and abide by His rules. When we step out of those boundaries, we put ourselves in danger, but our Heavenly Father does not push His virgin daughter out of His house unless she refuses to follow the rules the Father lays down in His own house and she leaves in rebellion.
I'm not saying that if your father sent you off to college so that you could get an education, that means that his intentions were bad. What I mean is, our fathers have inherited lies, things of no profit. Jeremiah sixteen:19. My six key is not working. The break down of family and society, the rise of abortions, the dramatic increase in divorce and unfaithfulness, etc...all of these things tell us that our parents. who may have had good intentions, haven't had the most Biblical upbringings, and have come to believe that what's bad for their children is actually good. Things are turned upside down, and it's hurting women, not helping them. If fathers and husbands and young and married women did what the Bible says, there would be not ME, TOO movement, because women would never become victims in the first place.
Not all the blame is on the father, or else the daughter would face no consequences for her actions, and we know we do. I have. We should pray for our fathers, those of us who have them, and women should seek refuge in them (in Yah - meaning do not disobey the Heavenly Father if the earthy father asks you to) if they have no husband to provide that. For those women who have not fathers or husbands, seek the shelter of a close male relative who is not sexually immoral, or a righteous man of faith in Christ and the Bible who you look up to.
There was a time when there was no such thing as college, and people, men and women alike, still today go on to become successful, and even billionaires, who have no college education, or degree. Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob did not go to college, nor Sarah, Rebecca, Rachel and Leah. Yet, they had more knowledge, wisdom, and understanding in their little pinky fingers than you, I, or any college professor. Job was more wealthy than the average college graduate burdened with debt. People homeschool. People do their higher learning online. Who says an 18 year old girl has to be turned out to college alone? Our father in heaven sent men out two by two to spread the gospel, but we send our naive and influential young daughters off to college all alone? I do think we are also called to be set apart. While we live in the world, we are not to be of the world, and the average Christian in college is definitely of the world. Nobody said living in the world, for a woman, has to be done without a husband or father with her in the home. In fact, the Bible says other wise. The single life is a lonely one. It lacks accountability, guidance, and often leads to depression. Where does all this lead? Sin, guilt, and a repetitive cycle.
Chastity belts aren't necessary for young women who have been raised right, who have good guidance and protection from a good father, and who have the right heart. If a girl is determined to sin, she will, and a chastity belt won't stop her. Chastity belts won't stop a rapist or seducer, either. Those seducers are slick. I managed to get through high school with my virginity intact, one of maybe four other girls in my graduating class, but the college guys were more experienced and crafty. I hoped I wouldn't be burned, but I learned my lesson after being burned a dozen times or so until I wound up pregnant. I hope fathers don't think their daughters need to go through to learn. Fathers should not be financially or emotionally supporting a daughter in college so she can have such lessons in life. That's called causing and encouraging her to be a prostitute.
I am one of those college girls who entered college when all I wanted to do was get married and raise children, but other people had other plans for me, like college and a career. I dropped out with debt, wandered aimlessly from boy to boy and job to job, didn't get my head on straight until I wound up pregnant, didn't get married until my late 20s, and only had 2 children because sexual sins and bad decisions led to inability to have more children.
I heard on the radio twice the other day by two different people that the American Dream was to have a home, a nice car sitting outside, a 401k, a marriage, and 1 kid. Could it have anything to do with kids and parents throwing the Bible out the window in college and embracing their liberal college professors' ideas of the American Dream? The modern American Dream, sounds to me, like what will likely become the downfall of America. One kid? That's called a population decrease, or the wiping out of the American people. The commandment is to multiply and fill the earth, not go to college and start a career and a 401k.
The problem continues... Churchianity keeps grasping for, but often not finding, practical answers for single women...
https://www.premierpraise.com/Disco...want-Christian-men-to-man-up-and-ask-them-out
https://www.premierpraise.com/Disco...want-Christian-men-to-man-up-and-ask-them-out
I've read many reports from men that they don't ask out women of their own congregation because they get shot down and then she badmouths them to the whole group, killing his chances with anyone else. I've even heard of them enlisting the pastor to beat him down some more and working to keep local men from dating the women there (all the while non-Christian men have the run of them).
Notice how the thrust of the article is the problem is the men; how the men need to fix this by asking them out more or committing more. The article is completely from the perspective that women are perfect the way they are and just need to look outside their church to find someone who appreciates them.
When you have 60% women there just aren't enough men. And it won't get any better outside the church; not with metoo wrecking havoc. The true answer is for women to be proactive. If no ones asking you out, that's a sign that you're not desirable enough or are sending signals that scare them away. The only way you can change this is to improve yourself and approach men yourself.
So there is an easy solution, they just don't like it!
And here we get to the crux of the problem. The reason it is so bad is the sex ratio isn't 60:40 as advertised but more like 88:12 because the women are ignoring most of the men. Most men don't "see several women at the same time" or get "a lot of emotional intimacy with a lot of women". That is only true of the very top shelf of men. And there will never be enough of them; even with polygyny. These women are only chasing the most attractive men and then complaining when they aren't good enough to lock one down for dating, much less marriage.
Unrealistic expectations.
I'm sorry....I lost all control and commented on that article. Maybe you all wanna check it out in a few days and see some fireworks? Heh heh..
Ooooo... I love fireworks.... (quote from The Patriot)
Seriously, enjoy watching these exchanges. Looking forward to how it goes. May Yah use you as a beacon!
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So very good you said what you said! Good for you! It's harder for nay-Sayers to argue when a comment like yours comes from a woman. Bless you
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A lack of marriageable men in monogamy-only societies is a situation that has certainly been around for a while.
I wonder if it could be calculated how many women in the last hundred years alone have had to live out their lives never having had a spouse who loved them, provided for them and facilitated the children they wished for. I bet it's very many.
This, a little snapshot from 94 years ago in New Zealand...
https://paperspast.natlib.govt.nz/periodicals/LADMI19251001.2.39
I wonder if it could be calculated how many women in the last hundred years alone have had to live out their lives never having had a spouse who loved them, provided for them and facilitated the children they wished for. I bet it's very many.
This, a little snapshot from 94 years ago in New Zealand...
https://paperspast.natlib.govt.nz/periodicals/LADMI19251001.2.39
(What do you do with a problem like Maria? If you didn’t sing it, I can’t help you)
The Universal Church (Catholic, for those of you from Rio Linda
) actually had nunneries to absorb the , ahem, excess. While Martin Luther kinda sorta accepted poly, he didn’t put it out there as the replacement.
It is a sad number, no doubt. I had an aunt die unmarried and without children, and a friend only a few years older then I. Two in my very small circle is two too many.
This is one of the reasons I am so outspoken about polygyny. If the good men are already taken, why not try and spread the word. The alternative is digging through the leftovers.
How funny that today many women delay marriage to the point they end up marrying men they neither love nor esteem.
I love how the article casually dismisses the idea of polygamy!
It was over three months since that initial coffee interview with Rebecca. And while I had completed the data collection and analysis, the question that everyone was asking was – what are the solutions?
My initial reaction to this was being wary of a one-size-fits-all answer. Indeed, aside from the more than controversial idea of polygamy(!) there is no easy answer.
My initial reaction to this was being wary of a one-size-fits-all answer. Indeed, aside from the more than controversial idea of polygamy(!) there is no easy answer.
While each of these solutions come with arguments for and against,
So I'm wondering what the argument FOR #2 could possibly be????
2. Date outside of church - In the long run, the most obvious pathway that women can take is to date outside of the church. Although a taboo in many Christian circles, over 45 per cent of women and 42 per cent of men in our study said they would consider dating a non-Christian. In particular, 9 per cent of women said they might, because they “do not want to remain single and where they are there aren’t many Christians available”.
We CAN"T have polygamy, but GO AHEAD and date that non Christian over there!!!!
I believe that it is not a decision that is that black/white.
They simply don’t have concrete borders on their options and they allow themselves to be attracted to what is handy.
It’s not a conscious decision to date unbelievers, just a trust in themselves that they won’t make a mistake.
I don't know how you can see this as an UNconscious decision:
over 45 per cent of women and 42 per cent of men in our study said they would consider dating a non-Christian