Through this process in understanding plural marriage, I have had to learn to let go of “submission” to my pastor and I have had to really learn what it means to “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.” (Eph 5:22). Submission has become one of the biggest tests in my life. By me finally learning to let go of my control, I have handed the extra weight of responsibility to my husband. Realizing I am obeying God’s command to my life to submit has ultimately lifted the weight off of my shoulders. Should my husband lead me in the wrong, that is HIS mistake and he will be held accountable to Christ. When I WILLFULLY refuse to follow him, I am held accountable for my actions. One of the most amazing stories of submission to me is Sarah to Abraham. She obeyed him to the point of almost adultery, YET, God protected her and in return praises her in the NT for her faith.
1 Peter 3:5-6
“For in this manner, in former times, the holy women who trusted in God also adorned themselves, being submissive to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, whose daughters you are if you do good and are not afraid with any terror.”
Is following your husband painful at times? Yes. Can he make mistakes? YES. But, who doesn’t? Do you trust God enough to submit is the real question.
In the beginning of learning about plural marriage, I wanted my husband to talk with our pastor too, but it was BECAUSE I knew the pastor would side with me and tell me he was in the wrong. I thought my husband was being deceived and leading us to a cult. After months of asking questions, seeking and learning, I saw how pastors don’t dig into marriage because they don’t want to lose the congregation. $$$
I certainly
THOUGHT I was hearing God tell me how wrong my husband was, but really it was emotions. I do not trust myself to be the final decision on anything anymore, and I thank God for a strong man to lead and take the responsibility off of me
seriously, such a blessing!
Women are not logical when it comes to PM, it is the most emotional thing I have ever experienced. It cut deeper than anything. I actually thought it would have been easier on my heart to have my husband tell me he loved someone else and didn’t want me anymore, than for him to say he wanted to love someone also.
@EternalDreamer, unfortunately, you are not in a quick fix place. It’s going to take lots of time and lots of talking and even more patience than you will have ever thought humanly possible (X2)