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Hello Ladies - New member here

Laurenatx

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Hi All,

My name is Lauren and I'm from Leander Texas, which is just North of Austin. I have never been married - I am interested in a polygyny marriage / though maybe God has that in mind for me and maybe he doesn't.

Found this forum / resource and was going to be around and reading and learning.

Lauren
 
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Welcome Lauren! I hope you find some wisdom and encouragement here.
 
Welcome Laurenatx! I'm glad you posted an introduction. Please feel free to ask any questions you like. There's plenty of posts to read if you go through them, so spend some time doing that too.
We have a ladies chat on a Monday evening if you would like to join us, the chat link is at the top of the page. It's at 7.30pm Eastern time.
 
Welcome welcome! There’s lots of great people here :)
 
Welcome! We’re also in Texas, though not near Austin. Hope to chat with you more, especially on Monday!
 
Welcome!
I am always curious as to how a single gal got interested enough in polygyny to consider it personally. I grew up aware of the practice, but never thought of it in a personal way until after I was married with three kidlets.

I rarely remember the ladies chat on the day and at the time....but I hope you enjoy the site and the great ladies that do chat!
:)
 
Welcome from a fellow Texan. We are northeast of Dallas. There is a lot of good information on here and this a great group of people.
 
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@Joleneakamama - I don't mind sharing that....or at least what first made me consider it. Apologies up front that I am not the most eloquent story teller....

There was a very close friend of my mothers / who I grew up calling Aunt and we considered family... She never married but when I was like 9 had gone through the process of getting a sperm donor so that she could have a child / I think she must have been getting close to 40 so decided that she was going to do it etc.

Well then fast forward to when I was 13/14 and she went through some very difficult times...her son was diagnosed with a brain tumor, and blessedly the ensuing surgeries and treatment went as well as possible / and he's still doing well today and has shown no signs of coming back thus far. Sadly only like 6 months later she herself was diagnosed with Stage 4 cancer - things were very tough on her and I can just clearly remember how tough it was for her, having to meet her end and not knowing how her son would be taken care of and raised after she was gone. Her parents were much older when they had her, so they were like in the late 70's? (approximately) when she was going through this. She has a brother who she did leave her son with to raise, but he wasn't exactly a model choice and she had some big disagreements in general with he and his wife about how things should be / just a big general gap in values etc.

So that might seem strange, but I saw a documentary or something about polygyny around the same time in my life, and just the idea of there being a family structure in place to deal with those kinds of things really struck me...that if something like that came along either I would be there for someone else, or that they would be there for me.
 
@Joleneakamama - I don't mind sharing that....or at least what first made me consider it. Apologies up front that I am not the most eloquent story teller....

There was a very close friend of my mothers / who I grew up calling Aunt and we considered family... She never married but when I was like 9 had gone through the process of getting a sperm donor so that she could have a child / I think she must have been getting close to 40 so decided that she was going to do it etc.

Well then fast forward to when I was 13/14 and she went through some very difficult times...her son was diagnosed with a brain tumor, and blessedly the ensuing surgeries and treatment went as well as possible / and he's still doing well today and has shown no signs of coming back thus far. Sadly only like 6 months later she herself was diagnosed with Stage 4 cancer - things were very tough on her and I can just clearly remember how tough it was for her, having to meet her end and not knowing how her son would be taken care of and raised after she was gone. Her parents were much older when they had her, so they were like in the late 70's? (approximately) when she was going through this. She has a brother who she did leave her son with to raise, but he wasn't exactly a model choice and she had some big disagreements in general with he and his wife about how things should be / just a big general gap in values etc.

So that might seem strange, but I saw a documentary or something about polygyny around the same time in my life, and just the idea of there being a family structure in place to deal with those kinds of things really struck me...that if something like that came along either I would be there for someone else, or that they would be there for me.

Thanks for sharing!
I have a mormon cousin who decided she was NOT going to miss out of having children just because she had yet to find a husband, and chose artificial insemination to have a child. She has since married. The bishop etc. in the mormon church had fits trying to decide what, if any, action they should take. She wasn't being promiscuous, and the pregnancy wasn't the accidental result of unrestrained passion. Lol. I'm not aware of any "negative" action taken by "the church" in her case, and I still laugh a bit whenever I think about the perplexity the poor folks must have struggled with.

I can certainly understand the appeal of having people already part of the family you would trust to raise your children in the sad event that you could not. In my opinion it shows some uncommon foresight on your part to consider all those aspects.
I would think being open to whatever God has would help you in trusting you are not missing out on a husband because you chose to narrow the field and exclude the man God had for you.
I did not give God a list of required qualities I wanted in a husband. I left it all up to Him, and have been blessed with more then I could have asked for.
Now I hope and pray that our children all end up as happily married!
 
@Joleneakamama - Completely agree with your point there / I certainly don't know what God has in store for me and I hope to find my way. In my very first post I kind of very shortly mentioned that I don't know if this is what he has in store for me or not.

I don't know if I'm very foresightful (don't think that's a word) - but more like was just at enough of an age to really feel heartbroken for her and the my exposure happening at the same time had my wheels turning - more like it was just right there in front of me to make it be something that I would consider a valuable option as a possibility.
 
I don't know if I'm very foresightful (don't think that's a word) - but more like was just at enough of an age to really feel heartbroken for her and the my exposure happening at the same time had my wheels turning -

I've long told people that life brought the subject up for us, and it was in a way empathy for my hubby's old girlfriend that made me first consider it. They had grown up together, and been friends for years. At about 19 she wanted to marry him, but he was not in a position to marry. Then just a few weeks before we met he asked her to marry him.....and she said no. She probably was not expecting that question, as they did not have a physical relationship (read no kissing and such going on) she also thought to inherit property from the woman she was living with....who didn't overly care for the guy who popped the question! When I came along and he brought me home to meet the family I met her too, and she was very upset. It was heartbreaking putting myself in her shoes, and thinking of how awful it would be to lose someone that way. A few years later her boyfriend decided he was too old for her and dumped her (after living with her for three years!) And it was then that we helped her get back on her feet, and considered her being part of the family. Long story short she decided that life was not for her, and I decided I liked the thought very much and would be very willing to live that way. That was 17 years ago, and it's still a nice idea, but only God knows if polygyny will ever be our reality.
Good thing I'm not holding my breath! :p
 
Hi Lauren.,, welcome!!!!! I rarely remember the ladies chat on Mondays but the one time I did... I really enjoyed getting to know the other ladies. I’m in Kansas but have friends and family in Texas. Feel free to holler if you want to chat.
 
Hi Lauren! I am excited to hear that you live near me ~ we live in Pflugerville. Will you be attending the Ladies Retreat in March? Welcome to Biblical Families!
 
Hello Lauren! Welcome to BF. If you can attend the ladies retreat in Houston, it's a wonder experience to be a part of. You will meet a group of wonderful, heart warming and genuine women. Hope you can join us!
 
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