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Me? Obey Him?

Well I saw this post and so I ordered the book. And I have to say that I am a tad disappointed. She gave all the scripture that told us we need to be submissive to our husbands, but didn't give us any working solutions. I have read Created to be His Helpmeet twice now and I think you get the best of both worlds with that one. You get the biblical ground work, and you also get practical ideas on how to implement it. Thanks for the suggestion though. I have another one on order now called THE SURRENDERED WIFE. Have any of you read that one???
 
Morning Ladies! :D

RISE & SHINE AND GIVE GOD THE GLORY! Just want to chime in and sing some praises to God for moving in and through each of us last night with the kick off of the new ladies bible study. Thanks be to God also, for helping us all to glide along through a few of the kinks that are to be expected when setting out on such an adventure. ;) Thankful for the gifts & talents that He's blessed Ms.Heather with, and many of the other lovely sisters in Christ here on this forum and that we're present for last night's study! I truly enjoyed the wonderful fellowship, shared hearts of personal testimony and the shared nuggets of wisdom. Such a lovely source of encouragement. I'm so looking forward to next week's study, where ever God chooses to lead us.

Again, the book has been a true source of Godly direction and encouragement thus far for me in my marriage. For me it has been easy to follow, not to shallow or too in-depth or legalistic either. A good balance all in all. Yes a little more specific direction/advice or tips would be more helpful, but all in all it's a great start on the learning journey of Godly/balanced Submission! :) My dh is already seeing positive results and enjoying my growth in these areas. As I shared last evening, dh isn't fully surrendered to Yeshua in all areas of his life just yet. However through learning the lovely lost art of submission, dh is starting to grow and have more of a desire for things of the Lord! :D Sometimes it's about "baby steps," before getting to the meatier part of our walk or our studies.

As we're not all at the same place, or in the same season within our own personal walks of faith as others may or may not be. Again looking forward to where God will lead us through this study, and growing closer as Sisters in Christ! :D And of course, I'm excited for whatever we may study next. Take care all and Keep on Keepin on with Yeshua, family & friends. Going forth in His Might, Power & Love. Being a blessing along the way & being blessed in return, according to the true motives of our hearts! :)

Warm Wishes,
FOR HIS GLORY ALONE!
Faithful Servant

I PRAY THAT I BE NOT A HINDRANCE!
PROVERBS 3:5-8 :)
 
Well ladies, never could find my copy and just not at a point where buying another one is feasible or desirable right now, so I will have to sit this one out. Hope you have a great study though.

I do note that people keep bringing up Created to be his Helpmeet by the Pearls and I must say, I personally cannot ever recommend that book. Debi Pearl basically says a woman needs to suck it up and do it all herself if her husband is a slothful lazy man and never confront his sin but just accept him as he is. That is not Biblical and we do have an obligation to lovingly point out sin to our husbands and pray for their repentance in the matter and we should not be enabling their sin by looking the other way. Debi Pearl just has a very warped sense of submission and she likes to pick and choose. She is a horrible role model for young ladies and wives. Most of her child rearing advice is harsh as well and I don't recommend them either. In fact, of what I have read so far, I recommend *nothing* the Pearls have put out as they are far to fringe bordering on cult-like thinking. Some of their child rearing advice I *do* consider to cross the line and in my family, we would consider that form of discipline were we to see it used around us as abusive.

I'm sure there are far better sources for book studies done as a group than the slop the Pearls have put out and I sincerely hope you don't try and pawn that hockey off on our young ladies here. I would feel that a gross misuse of our Titus 2 responsibilities.

Becca
 
Greetings Ms.Marley!

So good to have ya here, as I look forward to getting to know you better. :) I hope that you find what you're looking for through this group here, and mainly through Yeshua's leading/direction for your marriage/life; in regard to your journey with biblical plural marriage. I also am interested in gleaning new Godly insights from you, from a Messianic (sry bout spelling!) - Jewish-Torah roots perspective within your own personal walk with Yeshua. Head knowledge tends to "puff oneself up," but I say that "Heart knowledge tends to build others up!" ;) I also look forward to you being able to join us in a ladies bible study here in the future.

Btw, I have heard of the book you mentioned: "The Surrendered Wife." So far I've heard good reviews, and would be interested in checking it out. As with any study or book that I may choose to participate in, before doing so I'm trying to train myself to seek Yeshua's will or plan with it for my life through prayer. As I feel led to continue reading a particular book and involving myself in a study, I want to seek Yeshua's nuggets of wisdom that He has specifically planned for me and my life/or calling. Praying also for his wisdom & discernment to keep away from my heart & mind anything that is not of God for my life. But also for me, trying to remember to seek Godly balance & order in my life. Kind of like the old saying, that sometimes "you don't throw the baby out with the bathwater." Well take care & be Blessed on the path that Yeshua's placed you on.

Warm Wishes,
F.S. :)
 
Thanks.... I did not get that feeling from Debi Pearl at all. I really think her point was to focus on you and not him, to leave him to God, and there were several stories in the book about women who were married to turds, and through their submission their hubbies found faith. Like everything in life, you should take what you like (or what applies) and leave the rest. I look forward to the new book, it should be here in a couple of days.

Maybe it would help to know my background a bit. I was raised by a single mother who is basically a man in woman's clothing. And Josh's mother is sort of the same kind of woman, the boss, the supreme ruler. So neither of us really understand our Yah given roles in marriage, so we are reading all of these things to try and understand better what He has in store for us. I am tired of being the boss, and I am sure he would like to be 'the man'. So we have gotten a ton of good things from Helpmeet and from Me? Obey Him? And we are trying to institute them.

Here is another question, are there any good books out there for him, because even the Pearls don't have one for the man. LOL I guess people just assume that all men know how to be a leader and bosses.... but that just isn't the truth these days.

May Yahweh bless you and keep you,
Marly
 
Hello again Marley,

Thanks for so kindly getting back with me, as I know how busy we women/mommas are! :D Just for clarification, I'm not the original person who posted about the book created to be his helpmeet. I did find a variety of Godly nuggets of wisdom and examples to soak in and apply to my life. However I also found that Ms. Pearl seemed to have twisted certain/not all, scriptures out of their original context.

And yes I also enjoyed some of the stories with examples of how to encourage even the most un-godly husbands towards salvation and melted - compassionate hearts that were once stone cold. But again, some of the stories/examples were way to the other end of unhealthy extremes. The story that stands out to me, was the one where the husband was physically abusing and molesting his son. May have just been a made up situation that Ms.Pearl used as a teaching point. None the less, her advice to do nothing outside of following her husbands lead/bury her head in the sand, & hope for the best basically is what she said was the proper thing to do. Very scary and unwise dangerous advice to be giving!

Yes we are to submit and obey in all things with our dh's, but God does not instruct women of the faith to follow their dh's into sin anywhere in His Holy written words/commands to us! God does hold men/husbands accountable for how they lead, provide for and protect their families, they do not get off scott free. God does not condone or give permission for men to abuse or take advantage of their wives in any way shape or form. We can stand up for ourselves in Christ Jesus, without being in open rebellion to Him or our dh's. Praying for God's protection and seeking His Godly council and direction along the way of any abusive path that some women may be stuck on. I just feel that while Ms.Pearl covered some good spiritual ground with a few moments of Godly encouragement in her book Created to be His Helpmeet, there was more legalisim and insensitive things/comments/advice that was given on a whole. But again, that's why I made the comment that we shouldn't always rush to just "throw the baby out with the bathwater!" ;) God did impress upon me some good-Godly nuggets of wisdom to glean from her particular book, but He also warned me to keep the rest far away from my heart. We all are on different journeys and different levels in our walks of faith. So what book may end up working for some, won't of course work for others. Nothing judgmental or condemning of others opinions here. That was just my 10 cents or more worth! :lol: Take care and Keep on keepin on with Yeshua, family & friends.

Warm Wishes,
Faithful Servant
 
Marley,

Three really good companion books to read are "Disciplines of A Godly Woman" by Barbara Hughes, "Disciplines of A Godly Man" by Kent Hughes, and "Disciplines of A Godly Family" by Kent and Barbara Hughes.

They are really helpful resources and great additions to any library.
 
Hmm... I guess the closer to home point that I was making is that while there me be some good in her books, it is the bad and twisted view of scripture and what submission really is and is not that makes me hesitate to recommend the book to our younger single ladies who are still trying to learn and grow. Much as you would not allow your young children to watch certain movies, books for young wives (and those aspiring to be) can leave permanent impressions and do damage that can be hard to undo. At my age, while I generally do not like to be considered a Titus 2, I accept I am getting there and so these kinds of things are in the forefront of my mind. Yes, there is so good... but for one not well grounded yet in the wifely arts, the bad outweighs that good immensely.

As for books for men, well, there are not a lot but one that comes to mind is "Wild At Heart" by John Eldredge. He has several accompanying books that can be worked through as a group or personal study. That might be a good place to start.

~Becca
 
Greetings & Blessings Ladies,

It is such an awesome blessing to have this forum, with the honor of growing in the Lord together as Sisters in Christ! :D And with that honor comes the responsibility of encouraging, supporting, trusting, and at some seasons - "Speaking the Truth in Godly Love with each other as well." I'm thankful that we all have had plenty of practice at growing in the art of speaking the truth in love with each other, through each of our own personal learning & growing journeys here.

I know that through the past year that I've been here among you wonderful ladies, that I've learned so much and God's Holy Words have just opened up to me, and come alive in my heart & mind like never before. I feel as though "my dry spiritual bones," have had an awesome time of Refreshing here! :) So I'd just like to thank you all for sharing your testimonies, your hearts, advice & book recommendations. We each as members of the body have been gifted with different talents, experiences & learned wisdom. That is what makes the body fit together and work beautifully in God's plan. We each have a different job to do in His Kingdom. We each are able to bless others on some level with the different gifts and talents given us, that we are then able to help further His Kingdom. :)

So as we journey together, part of the job of sharing wisdom requires recommendations and warnings towards any unbalanced, unsafe, false & dangerous teachings that may be floating around out there in this big world. But not without each of us taking any & all concerns to God in prayer first & foremost for what He'd have for us. Especially since we're all at different places/seasons within our own personal walks of faith with Jesus. And with that said, I'd just like to thank all of you who have been sharing wisdom regarding these book recommendations as of late.

I do agree with and see both sides, praises & concerns about Ms.Pearl's book that both Marley and Becca have shared with us. Marley, thanks again for recommending the book: "The Surrendered Wife," as I've heard good reviews. I would like to read that one next. Becca, thanks for pointing out that within the realm of younger ladies or ladies that are "new in Christ," without any previous training, knowledge or wisdom/life experiences as a Christian wife or mother, that yes Ms.Pearl's book "Created to be His Helpmeet," could be very daunting, dangerous & confusing information to take in. I guess that with these particular situations, I would maybe recommend reading this book with an older & more seasoned Christian if you will. To help bring Godly- balanced order & correction in regard to some of Ms.Pearl's twisting of scripture, advice, etc.

Anywho, I myself am very much looking forward to the next meeting/study session of the current book that we're going through! :D As I look forward to the lovely time of fellowship because of the study. I hope that you all will have a chance to get in on this wonderful study & time of fellowship. Take care and continue on the path that God has placed each of you on, finding direction, wisdom & His Peace & Joy along the way!

Warm Wishes,
FOR HIS GLORY ALONE,
F.S. :)
 
Hello Ladies,
It was a pleasure to talk to you guys and hear your thoughts and get to know you a little better last Monday night.

After talking to the other staff, I have decided to have the discussion for the Bible study right here in the Ladies forum. That way everyone can post their comments and the questions and responses don't go too fast for some of the participants. We will reserve Monday nights for ladies fellowship time. Of course, you are welcome to talk about the book, but you can also discuss anything else that comes to mind. It will be chance for us to have some girl time and get to know each other better.
So...same time, same place. http://express.paltalk.com/index.html?gid=1322739211

I think we have all the kinks worked out. I apologize for the fiasco last week and to those of you who weren't able to get into the room. I am still learning the ins and outs of Paltalk.

See you there!

With love,
Heather
 
I don't understand. You said that you were going to have it right here in Ladie's forum but directed us to the "paltalk" site. Can you please clarify for me?

SweetLissa
 
Love said:
We will reserve Monday nights for ladies fellowship time. Of course, you are welcome to talk about the book, but you can also discuss anything else that comes to mind. It will be chance for us to have some girl time and get to know each other better.
 
Hello Ladies,

I wanted to try and explain about the changes in the Bible Study a little more in depth. After talking with Heather after last Monday night, we decided that the Paltalk venue was not really what we were going for with the Bible Study. It made it hard to give complete thoughts or in depth thoughts for that matter regarding the book. So...we decided that we would put it on the forums. This gives each lady a chance to talk in depth about what God has put on her heart after reading portions of or the whole book. We would like to encourage you to post after reading anything that makes an impression on you. (Please let us know what chapter you are referring to though.) We would like to end the Study on Valentine's weekend, at that time you can post your overall thoughts on the book.

CindyW did bring up a good point about the privacy issue. So we have decided that we will have this thread ONLY on the private ladies forum. Now, if you are not a member of the private forum but are a member with your OWN username (not one shared with your husband) then you just need to go to the BF's home page and click on FOR WOMEN link. This will give you step-by-step instructions on how to request to be a member on the private forum. We will approve ladies as quick as we can. For those ladies who are NOT members, you will have to decide if you want to become a member and read others thoughts or just read the book yourself without the comments. We regret if this puts anyone in a bind but Heather, Lissa, and I thought this way would serve a greater part of those signed up for the Bible Study. Having our discussion on private forum also lets those ladies who could not be apart on Monday nights to join in.

As for Paltalk on Monday nights, we will still be doing that. Many ladies enjoyed the social aspect of it and you can spend as much or as little time on it as you want. BF is all about connecting with people so I hope all of you will spend at least some time on Paltalk on Monday nights. We do not have an ending date for this, so it can be an ongoing thing for our ladies. If you need more info on Paltalk then PM Love (Heather) or check past postings regarding it.

I hope I have explained things sufficiently for everyone but if you have a question let us know. Lissa, Heather and I do so much appreciate your patience regarding the Bible Study. It is our first and we are doing our best to make things work well for all.

Hope for the future,
julieb
 
Hi Folks,
Sounded like from the last post that we were on for Monday nights at 7:30 eastern on PalTalk.... I logged on and the room was apparently not active. So, what's the latest?
 
Try again, Linda, She just opened it a few minutes ago. Go to Me? Obey Him? p. 7, link at bottom of page.
--Kelly Deanne
 
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